Author Topic: Freespace-ized old joke  (Read 274 times)

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Freespace-ized old joke
This is the transcript of a radio conversation of a GTVA battlegroup with Vasudan authorities in the Deneb nebula in October 2368. Visibility and sensor range were both significantly impaired in the nebula.

Quote
Terrans: Please divert your course 15 degrees North along the Z-axis to avoid a collision.

Vasudans: Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.

Terrans: This is the captain of a GTVA vessel. I say again, divert YOUR course.

Vasudans: No. I say again, you divert YOUR course.

Terrans: This is the Hecate - class destroyer GTD Lexington, second in command of the GTVA 4th fleet. We are accompanied by three corvettes, four cruisers, and numerous support vessels. I demand that YOU change your course 15 degrees north, that's one five degrees north, or countermeasures will be undertaken to ensure the safety of this ship.

Vasudans: This is the Deneb IIa moon colony. Your call.
Shivans view most other species the way we view infectious diseases. They think they are doing good by curing the universe of them. After all, no one mourns the fate of smallpox.

The Final War For The Multiverse

 

Offline Trivial Psychic

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Re: Freespace-ized old joke
I remember that joke, and not a bad reinterpretation, but that last line doesn't entirely sound Vasudan.  I think it needs some tweaking.
The Trivial Psychic Strikes Again!

  
Re: Freespace-ized old joke
Classic.

Reminds me of the time a single Shivan Cain ambushed a GTVA convoy being escorted by Orion class destroyer Minnow, Fenris class cruiser Pelican, and a picket wing of Perseus.

The Cain opened up with all turrets and fired it's beam weapon on the Minnow, which mostly missed, but carved out a (fortunately) unoccupied hallway in the upper decks of the Minnow.

The Minnow, in turn, brought all available beam emitters to bear, fired everything she had, and deleted the Cain in a matter of seconds.

The comm channels were clear for a moment, until Alpha One of the Perseus wing sent a message to Minnow, where he said simply: "Temper, temper..."
« Last Edit: October 24, 2021, 11:48:36 am by Scourge of Ages »