Author Topic: [WIP] Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within  (Read 190446 times)

0 Members and 3 Guests are viewing this topic.

Offline The E

  • He's Ebeneezer Goode
  • 213
  • Nothing personal, just tech support.
    • Steam
    • Twitter
Re: [WIP] Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within
Bryan, that's not a design document. It's not even an outline.

A while back, I tried to write up a design document for a game I would like to make someday (Oh, and Bryan? If you're thinking of copying any of the phrasing in that document into your own screeds, you can **** right off). I never finished it, for various reasons (chief among them, a lack of time), but having to codify what I wanted to do into a structured document like this helps immensely when trying to figure out the scope of what you want to do. That's what a design document is: Not just a list of mission names and some badly written background.

In your design doc, you spend a lot of time (well, a couple sentences, anyway) on graphical and audio design. You are not at that stage yet; Your first step must be to fully define the story you want to tell, to get a full grasp of what it is you want to do. By "fully define", I am not just talking about the 61 missions you have listed (You're completely insane, by the way, if you think you can complete that many to a consistent quality standard. There's a reason why actually released campaigns tend to be much, much shorter than that.), but everything: Every character arc, every major and minor event.
If I'm just aching this can't go on
I came from chasing dreams to feel alone
There must be changes, miss to feel strong
I really need lifе to touch me
--Evergrey, Where August Mourns

 

Offline Colonol Dekker

  • HLP is my mistress
  • 213
  • Aken Tigh Dekker- you've probably heard me
    • My old squad sub-domain
Re: [WIP] Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within
Dude......I want this game you speak of in your design doc :C
Campaigns I've added my distinctiveness to-
- Blue Planet: Battle Captains
-Battle of Neptune
-Between the Ashes 2
-Blue planet: Age of Aquarius
-FOTG?
-Inferno R1
-Ribos: The aftermath / -Retreat from Deneb
-Sol: A History
-TBP EACW teaser
-Earth Brakiri war
-TBP Fortune Hunters (I think?)
-TBP Relic
-Trancsend (Possibly?)
-Uncharted Territory
-Vassagos Dirge
-War Machine
(Others lost to the mists of time and no discernible audit trail)

Your friendly Orestes tactical controller.

Secret bomb God.
That one time I got permabanned and got to read who was being bitxhy about me :p....
GO GO DEKKER RANGERSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
President of the Scooby Doo Model Appreciation Society
The only good Zod is a dead Zod
NEWGROUNDS COMEDY GOLD, UPDATED DAILY
http://badges.steamprofile.com/profile/default/steam/76561198011784807.png

 

Offline Bryan See

  • Has anyone really been far as decided to use even go want to do look more like?
  • 210
  • Trying to redeem, but under Tiger Parents
    • Skype
    • Steam
    • Twitter
Re: [WIP] Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within
@The E, I knew that wasn't a design document nor an outline.

Yet, I could start writing a design document on it, but that concerns Unreal Engine 4 instead of the FreeSpace Open engine.

As for the story I wish to define, I came up with an initial alternate universe story where the Terrans are wiped out by a cataclysmic event (see the 2018 Mortal Engines film, you are a ME fan) and hundreds or even thousands of years after that. The Parliamentary Vasudan Empire Navy, the dominant galactic power comparable to the UGSF/GTVA, is on the front against various hostile alien races. This story would expand itself to include travel across the universes (as seen in Blue Planet: Age of Aquarius)... It may sound absurd, but... is this story forward. But I do not want excessive exposition, especially on characters and species involved; in this case, the Vasudans, the Shivans, the UIMS, the Battura, the Bosconians and the Sadeen.

Oh, thank you for that.
Bryan See - My FreeSpace Wiki User Page (Talk, Contributions)

Full Projects:
Shattered Stars

Campaigns:
Lost in the Mist - Cyrene vs. Psamtik
FreeSpace: Reunited

Ships:
GTS Hygeia, GTT Argo, SC Raguel

Tools:
FSO TC/Game template

I've been under attack by Tiger Parents like Jennifer Pan...

 

Offline Strygon

  • 28
  • So long, and thanks for all the fish!
    • Steam
Re: [WIP] Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within
@The E, I knew that wasn't a design document nor an outline.

Then why on God's green Earth did you call it a Design Document (in both filename and when referring to said file)?

Quote

Yet, I could start writing a design document on it, but that concerns Unreal Engine 4 instead of the FreeSpace Open engine.

I fail to see how a design document has to be restricted to an engine. You can make design documents about anything, which, of course, includes, and SHOULD include, Freespace 2 mods.
Makes missions sometimes.
Finished Projects: Operation: Cloak and Dagger

Current Projects: Scrolls Part 2 (FREDding), Dimensional Eclipse (Art),
The First Contact War, GTDr Amazon HTL

[23:22] strypolygon: andrew
[23:22] strypolygon: i have one favor to ask of you
[23:22] strypolygon: never try speaking german again
[23:23] Andrewofdoom: No.

[18:50] 島風改八百三: the duck has multipli
[18:50] 島風改八百三: many duck
[18:50] 島風改八百三: left side
[18:50] 島風改八百三: even side
[18:50] 島風改八百三: handle it

[21:34] MP-Ryan: Why on earth would you Google this
[21:34] The_E: why would you not

[06:46] Strigon: how big is a mini-campaign again?
[06:46] Asteroth: smaller than a campaign
[06:47 ]Strigon: thanks

[05:56] Strigon: If I had to take a shot for each time I randomly decided to change the UI sounds, I'd have died of alcohol poisoning by now

[17:36] qazwsxal: time to have some fun
[17:41] z64555: VC++5 is not my idea of fun

[EatThePath] do your missiles do anything absurd?
[Strigon] describe absurd
[Strigon] the entire mod is absurd

 

Offline MP-Ryan

  • Makes General Discussion Make Sense.
  • Global Moderator
  • 210
  • Keyboard > Pen > Sword
    • Twitter
Re: [WIP] Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within
Bryan.  Please read this slowly and carefully, and ask any questions you may have.

You need to define the purpose of your mod.  While it is fine to make mods that focus purely on gameplay, over story, they lose people very quickly.  FSO lends itself to narrative-driven games.  You have dedicated a great deal of text to setting - the where of your mod - and virtually nothing to story.

If you succeed in a five-Act 60+ mission mod campaign - and that seems extremely unlikely - without a story, it is unlikely anyone will actually play it.

I strongly suggest you write a story you want to tell in five linear missions (or fewer!) and build that.  Not a demo, not a teaser, but a 5-mission campaign.  Write a story with a beginning, middle, and end that make sense.  Outline how each mission will contribute to telling that story.  Build a combined gameplay+narrative arc, showing how your story fits and is told through the missions.  Then design the missions themselves, and ensure they are bug-free.

What you've sort-of begun is a grand project that has no chance of success without some organization at the early stages, and that means writing what you want to convey first.  You can't make it up on the fly for the type of project you're envisioning.  Start small, develop your skills, and expand from there.
"In the beginning, the Universe was created.  This made a lot of people very angry and has widely been regarded as a bad move."  [Douglas Adams]

 
Re: [WIP] Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within
Well, it's a start.

In your design doc, you spend a lot of time (well, a couple sentences, anyway) on graphical and audio design. You are not at that stage yet; Your first step must be to fully define the story you want to tell, to get a full grasp of what it is you want to do.

I agree with this but I'd say write it down when you think about it. I don't think you need to know about every detail when it comes to defining the general athmosphere of a campaign.

By "fully define", I am not just talking about the 61 missions you have listed (You're completely insane, by the way, if you think you can complete that many to a consistent quality standard. There's a reason why actually released campaigns tend to be much, much shorter than that.), but everything: Every character arc, every major and minor event.

While I think it's good to have a highly detailed designdoc, which is probably necessary if you want to write something like BP without constantly editing already done work, there're a lot of retail grade campaigns that don't have all details outlined and still managed to deliver good works. Although I have to add that these authors had the ability to do things in their own head without screwing up.

As for the story I wish to define, I came up with an initial alternate universe story where the Terrans are wiped out by a cataclysmic event (see the 2018 Mortal Engines film, you are a ME fan) and hundreds or even thousands of years after that. The Parliamentary Vasudan Empire Navy, the dominant galactic power comparable to the UGSF/GTVA, is on the front against various hostile alien races. This story would expand itself to include travel across the universes (as seen in Blue Planet: Age of Aquarius)... It may sound absurd, but... is this story forward. But I do not want excessive exposition, especially on characters and species involved; in this case, the Vasudans, the Shivans, the UIMS, the Battura, the Bosconians and the Sadeen.

Positive: While I'd have to take another shot now, it seems a little more detailed than the last time.
Negative: You do this rethinking _after_ you already released the demo.

 

Offline Bryan See

  • Has anyone really been far as decided to use even go want to do look more like?
  • 210
  • Trying to redeem, but under Tiger Parents
    • Skype
    • Steam
    • Twitter
Re: [WIP] Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within
Bryan.  Please read this slowly and carefully, and ask any questions you may have.

You need to define the purpose of your mod.  While it is fine to make mods that focus purely on gameplay, over story, they lose people very quickly.  FSO lends itself to narrative-driven games.  You have dedicated a great deal of text to setting - the where of your mod - and virtually nothing to story.

If you succeed in a five-Act 60+ mission mod campaign - and that seems extremely unlikely - without a story, it is unlikely anyone will actually play it.

I strongly suggest you write a story you want to tell in five linear missions (or fewer!) and build that.  Not a demo, not a teaser, but a 5-mission campaign.  Write a story with a beginning, middle, and end that make sense.  Outline how each mission will contribute to telling that story.  Build a combined gameplay+narrative arc, showing how your story fits and is told through the missions.  Then design the missions themselves, and ensure they are bug-free.

What you've sort-of begun is a grand project that has no chance of success without some organization at the early stages, and that means writing what you want to convey first.  You can't make it up on the fly for the type of project you're envisioning.  Start small, develop your skills, and expand from there.
That will apply to HappyNewYear from woutersmits, at the least. And future projects.

Well, it's a start.

In your design doc, you spend a lot of time (well, a couple sentences, anyway) on graphical and audio design. You are not at that stage yet; Your first step must be to fully define the story you want to tell, to get a full grasp of what it is you want to do.

I agree with this but I'd say write it down when you think about it. I don't think you need to know about every detail when it comes to defining the general athmosphere of a campaign.

By "fully define", I am not just talking about the 61 missions you have listed (You're completely insane, by the way, if you think you can complete that many to a consistent quality standard. There's a reason why actually released campaigns tend to be much, much shorter than that.), but everything: Every character arc, every major and minor event.

While I think it's good to have a highly detailed designdoc, which is probably necessary if you want to write something like BP without constantly editing already done work, there're a lot of retail grade campaigns that don't have all details outlined and still managed to deliver good works. Although I have to add that these authors had the ability to do things in their own head without screwing up.

As for the story I wish to define, I came up with an initial alternate universe story where the Terrans are wiped out by a cataclysmic event (see the 2018 Mortal Engines film, you are a ME fan) and hundreds or even thousands of years after that. The Parliamentary Vasudan Empire Navy, the dominant galactic power comparable to the UGSF/GTVA, is on the front against various hostile alien races. This story would expand itself to include travel across the universes (as seen in Blue Planet: Age of Aquarius)... It may sound absurd, but... is this story forward. But I do not want excessive exposition, especially on characters and species involved; in this case, the Vasudans, the Shivans, the UIMS, the Battura, the Bosconians and the Sadeen.

Positive: While I'd have to take another shot now, it seems a little more detailed than the last time.
Negative: You do this rethinking _after_ you already released the demo.
I think I have to agree with Strygon, MP-Ryan and Nightmare about the design document. HappyNewYear is going to be the small project.

Regarding about my "rethinking" after I already released the bugfixed teaser demo for Shattered Stars, what else do I need to change? I wouldn't change the story concept of an alternate universe that's the same universe as the 2018 Mortal Engines film, and the Shivans' war against the Vasudans, UIMS, Battura, Bosconians and Sadeen.

I do know however that Shattered Stars is set after the very last scene of the film, because that film is a box office bomb sadly. :(

It is my solemn duty to create a stealth sequel to that film. For that I wanted to write something like BP without constantly editing already done work.

BTW, I am writing up a game design document based on what The E has given me. When can you collaborate?
Bryan See - My FreeSpace Wiki User Page (Talk, Contributions)

Full Projects:
Shattered Stars

Campaigns:
Lost in the Mist - Cyrene vs. Psamtik
FreeSpace: Reunited

Ships:
GTS Hygeia, GTT Argo, SC Raguel

Tools:
FSO TC/Game template

I've been under attack by Tiger Parents like Jennifer Pan...

 
Re: [WIP] Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within
Quote
I think I have to agree with Strygon, MP-Ryan and Nightmare about the design document. HappyNewYear is going to be the small project.

Errr...... HappyNewYear IS Woutersmits project, HE is the one with the designdocs for that.

Quote
BTW, I am writing up a game design document based on what The E has given me. When can you collaborate?

:banghead:
You should NOT do that.

Oh, and Bryan? If you're thinking of copying any of the phrasing in that document into your own screeds, you can **** right off.

 

Offline Strygon

  • 28
  • So long, and thanks for all the fish!
    • Steam
Re: [WIP] Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within

I think I have to agree with Strygon, MP-Ryan and Nightmare about the design document. HappyNewYear is going to be the small project.



I didn't say anything about the new year project, the only thing I did say was that your design doc is garbage.
Makes missions sometimes.
Finished Projects: Operation: Cloak and Dagger

Current Projects: Scrolls Part 2 (FREDding), Dimensional Eclipse (Art),
The First Contact War, GTDr Amazon HTL

[23:22] strypolygon: andrew
[23:22] strypolygon: i have one favor to ask of you
[23:22] strypolygon: never try speaking german again
[23:23] Andrewofdoom: No.

[18:50] 島風改八百三: the duck has multipli
[18:50] 島風改八百三: many duck
[18:50] 島風改八百三: left side
[18:50] 島風改八百三: even side
[18:50] 島風改八百三: handle it

[21:34] MP-Ryan: Why on earth would you Google this
[21:34] The_E: why would you not

[06:46] Strigon: how big is a mini-campaign again?
[06:46] Asteroth: smaller than a campaign
[06:47 ]Strigon: thanks

[05:56] Strigon: If I had to take a shot for each time I randomly decided to change the UI sounds, I'd have died of alcohol poisoning by now

[17:36] qazwsxal: time to have some fun
[17:41] z64555: VC++5 is not my idea of fun

[EatThePath] do your missiles do anything absurd?
[Strigon] describe absurd
[Strigon] the entire mod is absurd

 

Offline Novachen

  • 29
  • The one and only capella supernova
    • Twitter
Re: [WIP] Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within
Quote
I think I have to agree with Strygon, MP-Ryan and Nightmare about the design document. HappyNewYear is going to be the small project.

Errr...... HappyNewYear IS Woutersmits project, HE is the one with the designdocs for that.

Have to say, that i do not understand who make what for HappyNewYear...  :D

But i did not understand that for the Revenge: Final Conflict upgrade either  :lol:
Female FreeSpace 2 pilot since 1999.
Former Global moderator in the German FreeSpace Galaxy Forum.
Developer of NTP - A Multi-Language Translation Library Interface, which allows to play FreeSpace in YOUR Language.

Is one of my releases broken or not working? Please send a PM here, on Discord at @novachen or on Twitter @NovachenFS2, a public tweet or write a reply in my own release threads here on HLP, because these are the only threads i am still participating in.

 
Re: [WIP] Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within
Well Woutersmits started it. And Bryan... either collaborates with him again or hijacked it indeed. Dunno.

Stealing The_E designdocs is pretty mean though.

 

Offline Bryan See

  • Has anyone really been far as decided to use even go want to do look more like?
  • 210
  • Trying to redeem, but under Tiger Parents
    • Skype
    • Steam
    • Twitter
Re: [WIP] Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within
Well Woutersmits started it. And Bryan... either collaborates with him again or hijacked it indeed. Dunno.

Stealing The_E designdocs is pretty mean though.
I acknowledge that Woutersmits started it.
:banghead:
You should NOT do that.
Why? Is there something amiss? Nyctaeus told me earlier whether I make plans to start a project like that.
Bryan See - My FreeSpace Wiki User Page (Talk, Contributions)

Full Projects:
Shattered Stars

Campaigns:
Lost in the Mist - Cyrene vs. Psamtik
FreeSpace: Reunited

Ships:
GTS Hygeia, GTT Argo, SC Raguel

Tools:
FSO TC/Game template

I've been under attack by Tiger Parents like Jennifer Pan...

 

Offline wookieejedi

  • 29
  • Intensify Forward Firepower
Re: [WIP] Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within
:banghead:
You should NOT do that.
Why? Is there something amiss? Nyctaeus told me earlier whether I make plans to start a project like that.

The E stated he did not want you to copy from his document. Since it is from The E you should follow his statement to not copy from it.

 
Re: [WIP] Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within
The_E provided an example to show how an early concept for a professional made campaign/game looks like. He did that so that you can see how such a thing is structured, in order that you can learn how bring your own ideas into a form that allows you to get an overview what has to be done and how the story progresses. On the other hand he explicitly told you NOT to use his ideas, and I dare to assume that he's not interested in collaborating with you.

 

Offline Bryan See

  • Has anyone really been far as decided to use even go want to do look more like?
  • 210
  • Trying to redeem, but under Tiger Parents
    • Skype
    • Steam
    • Twitter
Re: [WIP] Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within
:banghead:
You should NOT do that.
Why? Is there something amiss? Nyctaeus told me earlier whether I make plans to start a project like that.

The E stated he did not want you to copy from his document. Since it is from The E you should follow his statement to not copy from it.
I didn't copy from his document, I follow his structure. Isn't that right?

Bryan.  Please read this slowly and carefully, and ask any questions you may have.

You need to define the purpose of your mod.  While it is fine to make mods that focus purely on gameplay, over story, they lose people very quickly.  FSO lends itself to narrative-driven games.  You have dedicated a great deal of text to setting - the where of your mod - and virtually nothing to story.

If you succeed in a five-Act 60+ mission mod campaign - and that seems extremely unlikely - without a story, it is unlikely anyone will actually play it.

I strongly suggest you write a story you want to tell in five linear missions (or fewer!) and build that.  Not a demo, not a teaser, but a 5-mission campaign.  Write a story with a beginning, middle, and end that make sense.  Outline how each mission will contribute to telling that story.  Build a combined gameplay+narrative arc, showing how your story fits and is told through the missions.  Then design the missions themselves, and ensure they are bug-free.

What you've sort-of begun is a grand project that has no chance of success without some organization at the early stages, and that means writing what you want to convey first.  You can't make it up on the fly for the type of project you're envisioning.  Start small, develop your skills, and expand from there.
The purpose of the mod is not only centric to the large Shivan/UIMS/Cylon/Battura/Bosconian/Sadeen modpack, introns and Shivan capship command... but also provide the future time many years after Capella, in a different universe where Terrans didn't develop space travel (see the 2018 film Mortal Engines). As of this writing it has no story, but I got an idea where it is set just after that film.

Speaking a story I want to tell in five linear missions or fewer, perhaps one that revolves around the PVE pilot using Shattered Stars assets. While that has nothing to do with the overall Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within main storyline, it has ramifications that leads to the main storyline involving the Shivans.

In that campaign, set many hours after the last scene in the Mortal Engines film, the Vasudans are retreating from Sol after a series of defeats in trying to stop the UIMS invasion of Earth.

Or some non-Shattered Stars-related campaign?

Do I need to write a design document still? Since I need to write a story.
« Last Edit: December 18, 2018, 05:10:10 pm by Bryan See »
Bryan See - My FreeSpace Wiki User Page (Talk, Contributions)

Full Projects:
Shattered Stars

Campaigns:
Lost in the Mist - Cyrene vs. Psamtik
FreeSpace: Reunited

Ships:
GTS Hygeia, GTT Argo, SC Raguel

Tools:
FSO TC/Game template

I've been under attack by Tiger Parents like Jennifer Pan...

 
Re: [WIP] Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within
If you follow the structure of the document it's fine, taking ideas from it is not. As long as you don't cross that line everythings OK.

Obviously you should write a story first, unless you mean with "writing a story" generating a couple sentences to describe the setting of the campaign. Than write a design doc how you can put it to FS with its mission structure. There are people who can do both at the same time, but for you it's better to do both things seperate.

 

Offline MP-Ryan

  • Makes General Discussion Make Sense.
  • Global Moderator
  • 210
  • Keyboard > Pen > Sword
    • Twitter
Re: [WIP] Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within
The purpose of the mod is not only centric to the large Shivan/UIMS/Cylon/Battura/Bosconian/Sadeen modpack, introns and Shivan capship command... but also provide the future time many years after Capella, in a different universe where Terrans didn't develop space travel (see the 2018 film Mortal Engines). As of this writing it has no story, but I got an idea where it is set just after that film.

Okay.  What you've described here is setting.  You want to tell a story about various factions (Shivans, etc) using two particular gameplay features (introns, Shivan capship command) in a setting after the Capellan supernova, without Terrans that have space travel.

I know you're very excited about Mortal Engines, but given that you've said it has nothing to do with your story both on the forums and in your outline, and that you've placed your setting into its far future, I'd suggest dropping all references to it as you're just making it more confusing.  Part of telling a story and creating a setting is giving only the necessary details and leaving the rest to the viewers interpretation.  There is a tendency among people new to writing to devote unnecessary writing and thought to setting and background at the expense of the things that are much more important, like story.  Even certain experience writers do/did this.

Quote
Speaking a story I want to tell in five linear missions or fewer, perhaps one that revolves around the PVE pilot using Shattered Stars assets. While that has nothing to do with the overall Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within main storyline, it has ramifications that leads to the main storyline involving the Shivans.

In that campaign, set many hours after the last scene in the Mortal Engines film, the Vasudans are retreating from Sol after a series of defeats in trying to stop the UIMS invasion of Earth.

Or some non-Shattered Stars-related campaign?

Do I need to write a design document still? Since I need to write a story.

This is a bit of a mess, but lets break this down.  You don't need to post answers to these questions (they'd fall under spoilers anyway), but these are the things you should be thinking about and developing before you even start building missions.

Storytelling means picking a theme - essentially, the lesson, thought, or meaning that you want to convey.  Every story has a theme of some kind ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theme_(narrative) ) driving it, and storytellers convey that theme through the settings, events, characters, and plot of the story itself.  So you need to decide what you want your mod to be "about."  What message or meaning should the players get from playing your mod?  You haven't identified anything that looks like a theme.

Next, what's the plot?  Your plot takes place in an arc, with a beginning, a middle, a climax, and a resolution.  You've described your beginning already:  "the Vasudans are retreating from Sol after a series of defeats in trying to stop the UIMS invasion of Earth."  In a video game, the "resolution" (denouement) is often a post-script, epilogue, or in the FSO engine, a final debriefing.  That's something you write, rather than FRED.  That means you have essentially five missions of gameplay (or fewer!  more is NOT always better!  some of the best stories ever written are SHORT!) to introduce your setting and characters, and create a beginning, middle, and climax of your story.  Over a five mission campaign, that usually means 2 missions for introduction, 2 mission to develop the setup for the climax, and one for the climax itself.  And just a note:  having a climax and resolution does not mean you can't leave the story open-ended for followup.  BP did this beautifully between AoA and WiH.  You don't have to tie up every loose end - but you do need to provide some closure of the primary plot.

Finally, when you've got the rough sketch of the plot sorted out, you need to figure out how you want to tell that story.  Who are the characters?  What role does the player occupy?  What level of agency (decision-making) does the player have in the missions themselves?  How are the characters going to develop that story?  What setpieces will be used?

It's only after you sketch out an outline of all of the above that you should even touch FRED.
« Last Edit: December 18, 2018, 08:25:07 pm by MP-Ryan »
"In the beginning, the Universe was created.  This made a lot of people very angry and has widely been regarded as a bad move."  [Douglas Adams]

 

Offline Novachen

  • 29
  • The one and only capella supernova
    • Twitter
Re: [WIP] Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within
I am confused why this have to be explained a whole half year after the announcement of this mod and AFTER the actual first release of it... this should have been explained even before the announcement of this mod at all :lol:.

So if a design doc have to be created... then it will take a few years, before Act 0 got its desperate needed patches  :D
Female FreeSpace 2 pilot since 1999.
Former Global moderator in the German FreeSpace Galaxy Forum.
Developer of NTP - A Multi-Language Translation Library Interface, which allows to play FreeSpace in YOUR Language.

Is one of my releases broken or not working? Please send a PM here, on Discord at @novachen or on Twitter @NovachenFS2, a public tweet or write a reply in my own release threads here on HLP, because these are the only threads i am still participating in.

 

Offline Bryan See

  • Has anyone really been far as decided to use even go want to do look more like?
  • 210
  • Trying to redeem, but under Tiger Parents
    • Skype
    • Steam
    • Twitter
Re: [WIP] Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within
The purpose of the mod is not only centric to the large Shivan/UIMS/Cylon/Battura/Bosconian/Sadeen modpack, introns and Shivan capship command... but also provide the future time many years after Capella, in a different universe where Terrans didn't develop space travel (see the 2018 film Mortal Engines). As of this writing it has no story, but I got an idea where it is set just after that film.

Okay.  What you've described here is setting.  You want to tell a story about various factions (Shivans, etc) using two particular gameplay features (introns, Shivan capship command) in a setting after the Capellan supernova, without Terrans that have space travel.

I know you're very excited about Mortal Engines, but given that you've said it has nothing to do with your story both on the forums and in your outline, and that you've placed your setting into its far future, I'd suggest dropping all references to it as you're just making it more confusing.  Part of telling a story and creating a setting is giving only the necessary details and leaving the rest to the viewers interpretation.  There is a tendency among people new to writing to devote unnecessary writing and thought to setting and background at the expense of the things that are much more important, like story.  Even certain experience writers do/did this.

Quote
Speaking a story I want to tell in five linear missions or fewer, perhaps one that revolves around the PVE pilot using Shattered Stars assets. While that has nothing to do with the overall Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within main storyline, it has ramifications that leads to the main storyline involving the Shivans.

In that campaign, set many hours after the last scene in the Mortal Engines film, the Vasudans are retreating from Sol after a series of defeats in trying to stop the UIMS invasion of Earth.

Or some non-Shattered Stars-related campaign?

Do I need to write a design document still? Since I need to write a story.

This is a bit of a mess, but lets break this down.  You don't need to post answers to these questions (they'd fall under spoilers anyway), but these are the things you should be thinking about and developing before you even start building missions.

Storytelling means picking a theme - essentially, the lesson, thought, or meaning that you want to convey.  Every story has a theme of some kind ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theme_(narrative) ) driving it, and storytellers convey that theme through the settings, events, characters, and plot of the story itself.  So you need to decide what you want your mod to be "about."  What message or meaning should the players get from playing your mod?  You haven't identified anything that looks like a theme.

Next, what's the plot?  Your plot takes place in an arc, with a beginning, a middle, a climax, and a resolution.  You've described your beginning already:  "the Vasudans are retreating from Sol after a series of defeats in trying to stop the UIMS invasion of Earth."  In a video game, the "resolution" (denouement) is often a post-script, epilogue, or in the FSO engine, a final debriefing.  That's something you write, rather than FRED.  That means you have essentially five missions of gameplay (or fewer!  more is NOT always better!  some of the best stories ever written are SHORT!) to introduce your setting and characters, and create a beginning, middle, and climax of your story.  Over a five mission campaign, that usually means 2 missions for introduction, 2 mission to develop the setup for the climax, and one for the climax itself.  And just a note:  having a climax and resolution does not mean you can't leave the story open-ended for followup.  BP did this beautifully between AoA and WiH.  You don't have to tie up every loose end - but you do need to provide some closure of the primary plot.

Finally, when you've got the rough sketch of the plot sorted out, you need to figure out how you want to tell that story.  Who are the characters?  What role does the player occupy?  What level of agency (decision-making) does the player have in the missions themselves?  How are the characters going to develop that story?  What setpieces will be used?

It's only after you sketch out an outline of all of the above that you should even touch FRED.

You say I described a setting many years after the Capellan supernova without Terrans that have space travel. But this mod is set in the same universe as the 2018 film Mortal Engines, which was this year's box office bomb sadly, but I said it has nothing to do with that far-future story. Therefore I decided to drop all references to the film. Therefore, in this mod, Earth and human/Terran civilization is already ground to dust. It means Tom and Hester, who are traveling in the sky at the end of the film, are already dead and it's likely we'll never see them again.

The fact that this mod is set in the Mortal Engines movie universe makes it likely that, given that the Capella supernova is "a bridge between this universe and their own," hinted by Adm. Petrarch at the end of FreeSpace 2 if Alpha 1 survives.

I am confused why this have to be explained a whole half year after the announcement of this mod and AFTER the actual first release of it... this should have been explained even before the announcement of this mod at all :lol:.

So if a design doc have to be created... then it will take a few years, before Act 0 got its desperate needed patches  :D
Oh, I used my mind as a design doc while making this. Act 0, now termed as a Teaser Demo, is similar to the FreeSpace 2 demo and the FreeSpace Alpha before it. The final release may not reflect it. IMHO, it's a mistake of not sketching an outline of any of the above and writing a design doc before starting a project.

Should I start a non-Shattered Stars campaign that's 5 mission or less? If I do, must I write a design doc and outline together?
Bryan See - My FreeSpace Wiki User Page (Talk, Contributions)

Full Projects:
Shattered Stars

Campaigns:
Lost in the Mist - Cyrene vs. Psamtik
FreeSpace: Reunited

Ships:
GTS Hygeia, GTT Argo, SC Raguel

Tools:
FSO TC/Game template

I've been under attack by Tiger Parents like Jennifer Pan...

 
Re: [WIP] Shattered Stars: A Deepness Within
If you want to make it good, you have to write one. That requires you to have a story first.

What I don't understand is why is this thing set in the ME universe if.you decide to drop all references?