Hard Light Productions Forums
Off-Topic Discussion => The Classics => Topic started by: Axem on August 07, 2004, 12:15:58 pm
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I'm not quite sure how this idea came into my head. Probably something to do with that Ken Jennings guy in the news. Anyhow, after 2 nights of work, I give you FreeSpace: Jeopardy! I really hope that Raa and Carl don't mind me using their names, but I couldn't think of any better names for a Vasudan or a Shivan... If you guys don't like me using the names, I can quickly change it if you like.
I would also like to point out that none of this was photoshopped... rather I used Corel Photo-Paint. The pictures aren't all that great, but it is very hard to find decent pictures for Jeopardy, so just ignore any very sudden changes.
Enjoy!
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(http://i.imgur.com/I2OyzLD.jpg)
Alex: Thank you for joining us in this special game of FreeSpace: Jeopardy. I'm Alex Trebek's 17th clone. Let's take a look at our players.
(http://i.imgur.com/fZT5Alu.jpg)
Alex: In the first round our Vasudan friend, Raa took a demanding lead by cleaning up in the "Obscure Vasudan Holiday" category. In second place is Adam, who was in first place near the end, but lost most of his money in a Daily Double.
Adam: Hey, that Daily Double was so unfair! I mean, "This failed Terran Operation took place right before the Great War."
Raa: Agreed, there were too many.
Adam: Exactly...HEY!
Alex: Moving right along, in last place is Carl... but he did start to bounce back after the "Things That Go Bump in the Night" category. So let's start Double Jeopardy. Here are our categories.
(http://i.imgur.com/g5xM4cC.jpg)
Alex: Adam we'll start with you.
Adam: Planets and Systems for $400.
(http://i.imgur.com/cGaPS8J.jpg)
Adam: What is the Colossus!
Alex: No... Carl!
Carl: SCREECH SCREE SCREECH-CH
Raa: The Glass Orb?! And just what is that supposed to mean?
(http://i.imgur.com/N7LKrs9.jpg)
Alex: Uh, Adam, pick again.
Adam: Uh... Games You Suck At for $400...
(http://i.imgur.com/7e3v2ao.jpg)
Adam: What is the Colossus!
Alex: No, I'm afraid not... Raa?
(http://i.imgur.com/fZT5Alu.jpg)
Raa: What is FreeSpace: The Terran blunder that unleashed the Shivans the second time that got us almost killed?
Alex: Why not.
Raa: I'll go for name that fish!
Alex: Which one?
Raa: All of them. I'm sooo hungry.
Alex: Uh, Carl, why don't you choose.
Carl: SCREECH.
Alex: Exploits of Alpha One for $2000.
(http://i.imgur.com/n7ZWZCN.jpg)
Alex: Here's a hint, it's not the Colossus.
Adam: What... isn't the Colossus?
Alex: Uh, close enough. How about I choose this time? Alright, ships that block out the sun for $2000!
(http://i.imgur.com/K4QfcPH.jpg)
Alex: Any one? The "colossal" flagship... "colossal." Anyone? Anyone at all? Adam?
Adam: Um... what is... the...
Alex: Yes?
Adam: ...the... ...the... Ooh ooh! I got it!
Alex: Yes?
Adam: What is the Sathanas!
Alex: ...
*BEEP BEEP BEEP*
Alex: The correct answer was... what is the Colossus...
Adam: Oh, can I change my answer?
Alex: Right, why don't we jump into Final Jeopardy now?
Cont. on next post
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Alex:The category...
(http://i.imgur.com/DvCA0Le.jpg)
Alex: Again with Alpha One. Alright. Here's the answer.
(http://i.imgur.com/pgvdVgD.jpg)
Alex: Start.
*Jeopardy Theme*
Alex: Alright, Carl, what did you put down?
(http://i.imgur.com/WRLhUXe.jpg)
Alex: Uh, I'm not sure we can accept that, how much did you wager? -$1,000,000? Can you do that?
Carl: SCREEEEEE
Alex: Alright alright. Just put down the beam cannon... Now, what did Adam put down?
(http://i.imgur.com/94tAJp6.jpg)
Alex: No, it wasn't Colossus wing. And how much did he put down... $82.17.
Adam: It's my grocery bill.
Alex: Moving onto Raa.
(http://i.imgur.com/7XdX2Jc.jpg)
Alex: I'm sorry, but you must put your response as a question... But it wasn't right anyway. The correct answer was "Alpha". And you wagered... a head...
Raa: I'm starving!
Alex: So, by looking at the fierce competition today, the winner is... uh... Adam.
Adam: Really?! So I get the money?
Alex: Yeah, sure. Join me next week as we do DOOM3 Jeopardy.
(http://i.imgur.com/iDb9BAr.jpg)
Alex: I'm Alex Trebek's 17th clone, saying good night. Now a word from our sponser.
BOSCH BEER!
You know you want to.
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Originally posted by Axem
BOSCH BEER![/size]
(http://www.mts.net/~jmsrmr/narfin/fs2jep/boschbeer.gif)
You know you want to.
hehehehe
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awesome
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Subtle messages on that beer bottle.
ps. I wuv Carl, he's such a cute little fellow.
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:lol: heh sweet
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:lol:hehehe:lol:
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Originally posted by Janos
ps. I wuv Carl, he's such a cute little fellow.
SCREEECH!
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:lol:
ROFLMAO!!!
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LOL!
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That's good! :lol:
*wipes tears of laughter away*
This one definately has to be saved for posterity :D
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Awesome :yes:
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:lol:
-1,000,000? Can you do that?
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[q]Adam: Hey, that Daily Double was so unfair! I mean, "This failed Terran Operation took place right before the Great War."
Raa: Agreed, there were too many.[/q]
So true...
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Nice :yes: Will there be a next round ? :rolleyes:
Btw I don't know why, but I somehow got the feeling I should join the NTF...
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Originally posted by Carl
SCREEECH!
Oh! This came so suddenly!
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HAHAH, great job! I almost fell of my chair :D
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This belongs in the highlights!
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Alex: Uh, I'm not sure we can accept that, how much did you wager? -$1,000,000? Can you do that?
:lol::lol::lol::lol::
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you should have had carl charge up his beam cannon or wip out the glowing hand blade thingies of doom
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Haha, that's awesome dude. :lol:
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ROFL!!! That rocks, i love it!
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muahahaha......priceless :yes:
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This is the most hilarious thing I've seen in a great long while. I loved it :lol:.
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I really think you unfairly portrayed Adam.
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This seriously needs to be turned into a Flash movie.
With better writing.
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To some extent I agree with Zylon. The first joke (Exactly. . . HEY!) had me rolling, but the rest didn't really do much for me. Either a longer bit (more jokes) or more banter between the contestants would help.
Still very funny though. I like the idea.
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Maybe Adam was stupid because he's an AI.
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ROFLMAO!
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That was great LOL :lol:
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the jeopardy sound effects would make things rock
...ships that block out the sun... hehe
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Heh now we just need a Freespace: Wheel of Fortune or Freespace who wants to be a Millionare :drevil:
:lol:
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or survivor:freespace
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Originally posted by silverwolf
or survivor:freespace
Welcome to 14th day of Freespace: Survivor. Last time our mentally and physically useless crew tried to create a working subatomic fission fusion particle menace device using just rotten bananas and two lumps of meat. Today, they try to protect the useless Terran capital ships from attacks of this week's surprise element... The HOL!
However, let's see what Cyntherea, or "Beta 2" as you may know her round here, said in the Box of Useless Highscool-class Confessions.
"I think those Shivans in their Maras are really not team players. I mean, me and Raa tried everything we could to get the Super Special Yellow Breakfast Plate of Semi-Victory, but they would just spin around and tell dirty jokes all day. Gosh, I'm sooooo tired of that Carl's totally insane screeching. I really think I am voting him in the next vote.
However, I think Adam is really, really sexy. I, I mean, I really don't want to talk about this." *giggles*
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Very, very funny, Axem... funniest thing I've seen here since the "Carl in a sand box" thread
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Lol funny. Poor Adam....HEADZ!
I'm new here, I haven't seen Carl around yet. I'll be sure to carry a lot of lunch with me to give him. Does he like cookies?
:p
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Originally posted by Marauder
Lol funny. Poor Adam....HEADZ!
I'm new here, I haven't seen Carl around yet. I'll be sure to carry a lot of lunch with me to give him. Does he like cookies?
:p
:welcome:
Welcome to HLP!
Exits are to the rear and left. Don't try to use them. Under you seat you'll find some crisped cookies and dog earned dungeon porn magazines left by Shrike, and a flamethrower - right now we're out of napalm, so you'll have to blungeon people to death.
If for whatsoever reason you find yourself crawling through the ductwork you have a more than average chance to meet a Shivan. Easy to spot with the five legs and all. If you're lucky it's just Carl who responds well to food offers. Give him your lunch and back away slowly. If not at least you'll die quickly.
In case of emergency plasma rifles are availible in the weapon locker which can be opened by God, :V:, an admin or a Superinteligent shade of the color blue. Beware the pilot's locker is protected by subspatial claymore mines.
Enjoy your stay!
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What's this doing back up?
Oh, I see.
Commense plasma core insertion. Gunnery control, target Marauder and open fire!
:welcome:
Welcome to Hard Light Productions. Exits are to your sides and rear, but don't bother trying to get out that way. Besides the fact that they are permanently locked, the corridors outside are guarded by automated sentry guns that have an annoying tendency to misread IFF transponders as hostiles. Under your seat you will find a flame thrower for emergency use (though you'll have to use it as a club for the time being; we're all out of ammunition for the flamethrowers themselves). In the event of a total catastrophy, Armagedden, or the 23 of each month, there are pulse rifles and heavy weapons secured in the lockers up front, but only the Admins can open them. If you run in to a Shivan in the air ducts, quickly and quietly set down your lunch and back away. Hopefully it's just Carl; he's usually satisfied by those. If you're not so lucky, remember that it is always better to get killed outright by a Shivan's plasma beam than to be maimed by it, so don't try to escape. The only other things to watch out for are the faulty grav plates in Hanger Bay 5, references to The Plan™, debating politics, and posting in old threads.
We hope you enjoy your stay!
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:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
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This would have to be one of the funniest things I've ever seen :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Nice first post :)
:welcome:
And now, the revered "Blitzerland's Welcome Speech:"
Beware of Tabbies in the bushes, if you smell petrol, it tis probably just the old Apollo stuck in the furnace. If you smell fire, tis just some poor sap getting the crap flamed out of him. Feel welcome to try out the motion sensor-equiped-minibar...you'll be charged three hundred dollars every time you get within ten feet of it.
The Library was infested with Shivans back in '99, the roof leaks, the floor creaks, the garden is infested with man-eating garden snails, the cats have taken the observatory...so, that explains the assault rifle under your chair.
But don't think about using it. We ran out of ammo back in '01. Neverless, you'll never feel more welcome anywhere else. Yes, our staff is availble 24/7 to tend to your every need. But avoid the Shivans in the air ducts.
Enjoy your stay, but don't even think about leaving. You won't be able to. Freespace will not let you leave. Muahahahahahahaha...
So...welcome! Stay as long as you can!
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:lol:
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:lol: :lol: very good :lol:
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Im still waiting for Freespace: Who wants to be a Millionare :doubt:
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Why am I just seeing this now?!
:lol:
Good stuff! :yes:
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holy mother of god this as hilarious, someone has too much time on there hands lol! this would make a good comic series here lol
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What is "ROFL"?
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Roll On Floor Laughing.
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Originally posted by Carl
Roll On Floor Laughing.
I made a Jeopardy joke, you man-eating alien monster! My humor is ruined now! RUINED!:(
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Since its all the rage these days...
Mystery Pic!
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v109/NarfPics/NarfinPix/carlinaction.jpg)
I'll leave you to what this totally out of context picture means. ;)