Author Topic: Freespace meme crowdsourcing  (Read 239 times)

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Offline Mito [PL]

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  • Proud Member of Slavicus Mechanicus
Freespace meme crowdsourcing
Hello there,

So this idea comes from a couple of Joe's streams. Basically, I had the funny idea of convincing Joe to voice act something along the lines of Sergeant Arch Dornan from Fallout 2 (which he was quite interested in, IIRC)
The problem, and the reason behind this topic, is that it would be nice to come up with a rewrite of the original to suit Freespace a tad better. And I don't really have ideas how to do it well at this point, hence the "crowdsourcing". Knock yourselves out, I guess :P .


Maybe I'll try something for starters.
Hidden Text: Show

Welcome to the 53rd Hammerheads. So, you're the new replacement... YOU ARE OUT OF UNIFORM, PILOT! WHERE IS YOUR FLIGHTSUIT?

[Uh, I wasn't issued any flightsuit.]

Don't have any? YOU EXPECT ME TO BELIEVE THAT, ROOKIE? The truth is you LOST and expensive piece of navy-issue equipement. That suit is going to come out of YOUR PAY, AND YOU WILL REMAIN IN THIS MAN'S NAVY UNTIL YOU ARE FIVE HUNDRED AND TEN YEARS OLD, which is the number of years it will take for you to pay for a Mark II Advanced Flight Suit YOU HAVE LOST! REPORT TO THE FLIGHT DECK AND HAVE A NEW SUIT ISSUED TO YOU, THEN REPORT BACK TO ME, ENSIGN! DISMISSED!

(comes back without a suit)

Pilot, you are still out of uniform. I gave you a direct order to report to supplies and get your issue. NOW, GET OUT OF MY FACE AND DON'T COME BACK UNTIL YOU LOOK LIKE A PILOT!

(comes back without a suit again)

This is the second time you have come to me out of uniform, Pilot! THERE WILL NOT BE A THIIIIIRD!

And so on. Although I think it'd be better to mix in something more Freespace-y.
« Last Edit: January 30, 2022, 02:29:53 pm by Mito [PL] »
How do you kill a hydra?

You starve it to death.

 

Offline DahBlount

  • 29
  • Alpine ☆ Cancer Tribulation
    • Minecraft
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    • Steam
Re: Freespace meme crowdsourcing
Hidden Text: Show
Attention all FreeSpace gamers. Admiral Bosch is in danger and he needs your help to defeat the GTVA and make Terrans Great Again, but he's gonna need the Iceni and several squadrons of Lokis to do this. To help him, all he needs is your credit card, the three numbers on the back, and the expiration month and year, but you gotta be quick, before Alpha 1 prevents him from finishing Project ETAK and destroying our last chance of surviving the Shivan onslaught, forever.
<Axem> yet still more insightful than #hard-light

<Axem> jad2.23 will just be cat videos

<DahBlount> So
<DahBlount> JAD2.2 is like that
<Axem> maybe
<Axem> it can be whatever you like!
<DahBlount> A Chocolate Sundae?
<Axem> sure

My models: GTF Gilgamesh - GTD Nuadha [Redesigning] - Ningirama [WIP] - GTG Zephyrus

 

Offline DefCynodont119

  • 29
  • Ascended Faustus Artist
    • Steam
Re: Freespace meme crowdsourcing
How about some of the bot-generated mission briefings that were posted on the discord?

Hidden Text: Show

Code: [Select]
We have reason to believe that a shivan corvette from shivan armada has been conducting many surprise attacks on convoys throughout beta management module, your responsibility will be to eliminate all evidence of shivan activity.

In order to enable tag engineers, you will be armed with greater precision than training fighters, engineers have modified a substitute for actual effectiveness against vessels, countermeasures. Good.

The galatea should now assist reinforcements at 3rd simulator field immediately, pilots with dogfighting techniques predict only a forty percent chance of your ability to provide crucial submunitions to carry to the enemy targets. Be sure to acquaint your ordnance to the shivans properly.

If you encounter custom vessels, including turrets with ultra war fire support, you will be required to engage some diversion at least. This mission is of grave importance for research in the nebula environment field: Intelligence estimates indicate unusual control of light activities.

Command believes scrambling scrambled weak zone pods is most impressive tactical strategies. Good hunting, training test fighter! Alpha 1 clicks: you.

Code: [Select]
Given the deployment of Vasudan warships within our systems, nearly fully armed freighters and Beta wing, we anticipate a large number of operations as they become too powerful.
Fortunately your squadron is a great example of the GTVA forces, and there 's no doubt of your responsibility.

Units of our unit will provide escort for allied vessels in Sirius and destroy the Vasudans before reinforcements arrive. After the Vasudans are finished, the Alliance will execute simultaneous targets within 3000 hours and destroy all targets of opportunity from Vasuda to Aldebaran.

Shivans will attempt to eliminate our convoys as well as the Vasudans, but we believe that 100,000 sentry guns will neutralize their offensive. Alpha wing from the colossus will provide cover for all of four minutes and maintain our guns. Dismissed.

Code: [Select]
Attention: this is commander snipes 's transmission, your 're among the first to prevent subspace cataclysm using only superficial attacks by a wing of four sharp cruiser 's. Good job destroying the nebula.

Great job, pilot leader.

You have no choice but to commission pilots with recent victories on their last performance, alpha 2 and his intentions are approved for your discretion, you may call them in if you 're too intense.

Until you encounter the lucifer, you will be unable to eliminate the lucifer, making it one of the most dangerous engagement against shivan warships besieging our forces since our first deployment. Intelligence suspects the existence of weapons and missiles in your loadout, you will be authorized to attack 4,000 triton squads of opportunity. Enif station is currently docked with the trebuchet missile launchers and beta wing is currently on board the gtva security council test module program module.

Not to be lost, the gtva 's most important craft will become destroyed before their cargo is your responsibility. Good pilots depend on your orders.

Code: [Select]
The NTF 's command authority suggests the Colossus and its followers are boarding two transports and are heading for the blockade. Asteroids will provide crucial intercept against NTF attack wings.

This is the endgame. Alpha and Beta and Gamma and bombers and interceptors must destroy these asteroids first and eliminate all targets. You must not allow them to assist the GTVA 's escape. Capturing the Colossus and its powerful contingent of civilian transports will be the greatest commendation for your squadron. If 1425 Vasudan warships from Vasuda Prime jump in, we 'll send in the Shivans to eliminate the Vasudans.

Have a special attention to any unforeseen problems. Command out.

My gift from Freespace to Cities Skylines:  http://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=639891299

  
Re: Freespace meme crowdsourcing
How about some of the bot-generated mission briefings that were posted on the discord?

Hidden Text: Show

Code: [Select]
We have reason to believe that a shivan corvette from shivan armada has been conducting many surprise attacks on convoys throughout beta management module, your responsibility will be to eliminate all evidence of shivan activity.

In order to enable tag engineers, you will be armed with greater precision than training fighters, engineers have modified a substitute for actual effectiveness against vessels, countermeasures. Good.

The galatea should now assist reinforcements at 3rd simulator field immediately, pilots with dogfighting techniques predict only a forty percent chance of your ability to provide crucial submunitions to carry to the enemy targets. Be sure to acquaint your ordnance to the shivans properly.

If you encounter custom vessels, including turrets with ultra war fire support, you will be required to engage some diversion at least. This mission is of grave importance for research in the nebula environment field: Intelligence estimates indicate unusual control of light activities.

Command believes scrambling scrambled weak zone pods is most impressive tactical strategies. Good hunting, training test fighter! Alpha 1 clicks: you.

Code: [Select]
Given the deployment of Vasudan warships within our systems, nearly fully armed freighters and Beta wing, we anticipate a large number of operations as they become too powerful.
Fortunately your squadron is a great example of the GTVA forces, and there 's no doubt of your responsibility.

Units of our unit will provide escort for allied vessels in Sirius and destroy the Vasudans before reinforcements arrive. After the Vasudans are finished, the Alliance will execute simultaneous targets within 3000 hours and destroy all targets of opportunity from Vasuda to Aldebaran.

Shivans will attempt to eliminate our convoys as well as the Vasudans, but we believe that 100,000 sentry guns will neutralize their offensive. Alpha wing from the colossus will provide cover for all of four minutes and maintain our guns. Dismissed.

Code: [Select]
Attention: this is commander snipes 's transmission, your 're among the first to prevent subspace cataclysm using only superficial attacks by a wing of four sharp cruiser 's. Good job destroying the nebula.

Great job, pilot leader.

You have no choice but to commission pilots with recent victories on their last performance, alpha 2 and his intentions are approved for your discretion, you may call them in if you 're too intense.

Until you encounter the lucifer, you will be unable to eliminate the lucifer, making it one of the most dangerous engagement against shivan warships besieging our forces since our first deployment. Intelligence suspects the existence of weapons and missiles in your loadout, you will be authorized to attack 4,000 triton squads of opportunity. Enif station is currently docked with the trebuchet missile launchers and beta wing is currently on board the gtva security council test module program module.

Not to be lost, the gtva 's most important craft will become destroyed before their cargo is your responsibility. Good pilots depend on your orders.

Code: [Select]
The NTF 's command authority suggests the Colossus and its followers are boarding two transports and are heading for the blockade. Asteroids will provide crucial intercept against NTF attack wings.

This is the endgame. Alpha and Beta and Gamma and bombers and interceptors must destroy these asteroids first and eliminate all targets. You must not allow them to assist the GTVA 's escape. Capturing the Colossus and its powerful contingent of civilian transports will be the greatest commendation for your squadron. If 1425 Vasudan warships from Vasuda Prime jump in, we 'll send in the Shivans to eliminate the Vasudans.

Have a special attention to any unforeseen problems. Command out.


So the NTF has control over the Shivans, and to counter that, the GTVA has 100,000 sentry guns with "ultra war fire support".

Someone please make this mod now.
Shivans view most other species the way we view infectious diseases. They think they are doing good by curing the universe of them. After all, no one mourns the fate of smallpox.

The Final War For The Multiverse