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Off-Topic Discussion => Arts & Talents => Topic started by: Assassin714 on October 23, 2021, 08:10:10 pm

Title: Freespace-ized old joke
Post by: Assassin714 on October 23, 2021, 08:10:10 pm
This is the transcript of a radio conversation of a GTVA battlegroup with Vasudan authorities in the Deneb nebula in October 2368. Visibility and sensor range were both significantly impaired in the nebula.

Quote
Terrans: Please divert your course 15 degrees North along the Z-axis to avoid a collision.

Vasudans: Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.

Terrans: This is the captain of a GTVA vessel. I say again, divert YOUR course.

Vasudans: No. I say again, you divert YOUR course.

Terrans: This is the Hecate - class destroyer GTD Lexington, second in command of the GTVA 4th fleet. We are accompanied by three corvettes, four cruisers, and numerous support vessels. I demand that YOU change your course 15 degrees north, that's one five degrees north, or countermeasures will be undertaken to ensure the safety of this ship.

Vasudans: This is the Deneb IIa moon colony. Your call.
Title: Re: Freespace-ized old joke
Post by: Trivial Psychic on October 23, 2021, 09:05:27 pm
I remember that joke, and not a bad reinterpretation, but that last line doesn't entirely sound Vasudan.  I think it needs some tweaking.
Title: Re: Freespace-ized old joke
Post by: Scourge of Ages on October 24, 2021, 11:15:09 am
Classic.

Reminds me of the time a single Shivan Cain ambushed a GTVA convoy being escorted by Orion class destroyer Minnow, Fenris class cruiser Pelican, and a picket wing of Perseus.

The Cain opened up with all turrets and fired it's beam weapon on the Minnow, which mostly missed, but carved out a (fortunately) unoccupied hallway in the upper decks of the Minnow.

The Minnow, in turn, brought all available beam emitters to bear, fired everything she had, and deleted the Cain in a matter of seconds.

The comm channels were clear for a moment, until Alpha One of the Perseus wing sent a message to Minnow, where he said simply: "Temper, temper..."