Hard Light Productions Forums

Off-Topic Discussion => General Discussion => Topic started by: Tiara on October 13, 2002, 12:24:25 pm

Title: Rofl
Post by: Tiara on October 13, 2002, 12:24:25 pm: http://www.whitehouse.org/initiatives/purity/index.asp
Title: Rofl
Post by: Stunaep on October 13, 2002, 12:32:01 pm: Quote
Myth: But everyone's doing it!
Reality: Surveys have repeatedly shown that up to 5% of Americans don't masturbate.

Gee, what a relief
:lol: :lol:
I'm sure that the number of 4-year-olds and 70-year-olds combined is bigger than 5% in America.

Now I don't want to jump to conclusions, but...

Unfortunate thing is, if Bush read this website, I'm quite sure he'd actually think of adapting this.
Title: ...
Post by: Star Dragon on October 13, 2002, 12:34:05 pm: There are no words...

President Bush can have my Photos when he prys them from my cold dead hands! :nervous:
Title: Rofl
Post by: CP5670 on October 13, 2002, 12:55:00 pm: Actually, this would be a pretty good idea to implement for different reasons... :D ;7
Title: Rofl
Post by: Fineus on October 13, 2002, 01:05:54 pm: Only America could come up with this and take it seriously :rolleyes:
Title: Rofl
Post by: Stunaep on October 13, 2002, 01:07:33 pm: eh... check the webpage. They aren't taking it seriously
Title: Rofl
Post by: Bri_Dog on October 13, 2002, 01:14:52 pm: I masturbated while reading that so :ha:

:p
Title: Rofl
Post by: Tiara on October 13, 2002, 01:44:08 pm: Quote
Originally posted by Bri_Dog
I masturbated while reading that so :ha:

You know....... You didn't have to tell that...

(http://freeze.mongtastic.be/files/emoticons4u/obscene/eck32.gif)
Title: Rofl
Post by: Fineus on October 13, 2002, 01:59:00 pm: Quote
Originally posted by Stunaep
eh... check the webpage. They aren't taking it seriously

But someone will. That's the problem with having a large country - lots of room for stupidity.

England on the other hand just has it crushed into a small space ;)
Title: Rofl
Post by: 01010 on October 13, 2002, 02:03:58 pm: Quote
Originally posted by Thunder

But someone will. That's the problem with having a large country - lots of room for stupidity.

England on the other hand just has it crushed into a small space ;)

Come to England, more stupidity per square mile than a country 1,000,000 time it's size.

I think roughly half of that comes from Stourport.
Title: Rofl
Post by: an0n on October 13, 2002, 02:10:12 pm: Ignorance and stupidity in the UK can all be tracked back to Portsmouth.

Paul Merton: If you could have the people of Portsmouth do one good thing to redeem themselves, what would it be?
Spike Milligan: Drown.
Title: Rofl
Post by: vadar_1 on October 13, 2002, 02:12:12 pm: Ah yes... the old half-life spray decal:

(http://fc.olaki.net/tss076a.gif)
Title: Rofl
Post by: Galemp on October 13, 2002, 08:37:23 pm: Oh God... :lol:
Title: Rofl
Post by: heretic on October 13, 2002, 08:46:27 pm: Thunder - that's not the official WH page, the whitehouse webpage is a .gov
Title: Rofl
Post by: Anaz on October 13, 2002, 09:26:27 pm: lol...that is funny...
Title: Rofl
Post by: Knight Templar on October 13, 2002, 10:07:10 pm: Quote
Thunder - that's not the official WH page, the whitehouse webpage is a .gov

Jeeze, whassup wit these Brits? So, so, guilable

heh my computer class in middle school all thought China was going to take over the world when they "hacked" the "whitehouse wepage" with "we nchinese, we play joke, we go pee-pee in your coke! hahaha hoe you like us now Mr. Big Dick Clinton!"

:rolleyes:
Title: Rofl
Post by: Stryke 9 on October 13, 2002, 10:28:13 pm: Quote
but the point is that God hates it when men waste sperm, no matter what the reason.

Would it be considered "wasting" it if I did it in someone's hamburger?

Had to ask.
Title: Rofl
Post by: Knight Templar on October 13, 2002, 10:31:48 pm: :lol: :lol: :lol:

you made me giggle...
Title: Rofl
Post by: Blue Lion on October 13, 2002, 10:37:12 pm: You made me cry
Title: Rofl
Post by: Vertigo1 on October 13, 2002, 10:50:04 pm: Quote
Originally posted by Stryke 9

Would it be considered "wasting" it if I did it in someone's hamburger?

Had to ask.

Hey, what's a little protein between friends? ;)
Title: Rofl
Post by: Grey Wolf on October 13, 2002, 11:53:41 pm: The thing is, the real page is almost as funny:
http://www.whitehouse.gov/infocus/iraq/index.html
Title: Rofl
Post by: Blue Lion on October 13, 2002, 11:56:44 pm: Yup, funny stuff :wtf:
Title: Rofl
Post by: Grey Wolf on October 13, 2002, 11:57:46 pm: I'm talking about the sheer amoung of propaganda they can fit on one web page.
Title: Rofl
Post by: Knight Templar on October 14, 2002, 12:03:58 am: wow, 3 uses of the word decade, 4 deceptions all without even scrolling down.

3 links to "Evil Iraq" and 2 non direct links.

hmm.. i'll look around later
Title: Rofl
Post by: Stryke 9 on October 14, 2002, 12:55:32 am: Hmmm... I like the bit about "hoping against the evidence"

...That Iraq can be justifiably invaded?
Title: Rofl
Post by: Fineus on October 14, 2002, 01:01:07 am: Quote
Originally posted by heretic
Thunder - that's not the official WH page, the whitehouse webpage is a .gov

I know that. But despite it - someone will take it seriously. Thats my whole point!

Sighs... Nevermind... forget it :blah:
Title: Rofl
Post by: Stunaep on October 14, 2002, 08:38:15 am: Quote
Originally posted by Stryke 9

Would it be considered "wasting" it if I did it in someone's hamburger?

Had to ask.

You made me never eat a hamburger again.
Title: Rofl
Post by: Borealis on October 14, 2002, 02:08:13 pm: Quote
Myth: Masturbation is harmless.
Reality: Medical science proves that chronic masturbation causes weakness, depression, forgetfulness and nearsightedness

then why am I still so farsighted? :D
Title: Rofl
Post by: Stunaep on October 14, 2002, 02:19:01 pm: I refuse to comment that.

Can I have you phone number? :D
Title: Rofl
Post by: Martinus on October 14, 2002, 02:26:20 pm: Quote
Originally posted by Borealis

then why am I still so farsighted? :D

First time I've used this and most likely the last: ;7 ;7 ;7

BTW Tiara exactly how did you end up finding this little story? :wtf:

:wink:
Title: Rofl
Post by: Borealis on October 14, 2002, 02:38:19 pm: Quote
Originally posted by Stunaep
I refuse to comment that.

Can I have you phone number? :D

Not if you're going to keep contradicting yourself :lol:
Title: Rofl
Post by: Stunaep on October 14, 2002, 02:48:42 pm: I'm not contradicting.

I'm not.

I'm not.

I'm not.

I'm not.

I think I'm gonna cry.
Title: Rofl
Post by: Stunaep on October 14, 2002, 02:50:02 pm: Quote
Originally posted by Borealis

then why am I still so farsighted? :D

You don't remember?

Quote
Medical science proves that chronic masturbation causes forgetfulness

Does that answer your question? ;7
Title: Rofl
Post by: Borealis on October 14, 2002, 02:57:49 pm: Quote
Originally posted by Stunaep

I think I'm gonna cry.

Quote
Medical science proves that chronic masturbation causes depression

;)
Title: Rofl
Post by: aldo_14 on October 14, 2002, 03:00:19 pm: *slowly backs out of thread*
Title: Rofl
Post by: Stunaep on October 14, 2002, 03:20:24 pm: Quote
Medical science proves that chronic masturbation causes smart-ass remarks

Actually, I just made that up.:p
Title: Rofl
Post by: aldo_14 on October 14, 2002, 03:25:41 pm: Quote
Originally posted by Stunaep

Actually, I just made that up.:p

Course you did, sunshine.
Title: Rofl
Post by: Borealis on October 14, 2002, 03:45:19 pm: Quote
Originally posted by aldo_14
*slowly backs out of thread*

ever notice how people who say that always come back? :nod:
Title: Rofl
Post by: Zeronet on October 14, 2002, 03:53:12 pm: Quote
Originally posted by Grey Wolf 2009
The thing is, the real page is almost as funny:
http://www.whitehouse.gov/infocus/iraq/index.html

:wtf: Its actually quite a serious matter.
Title: Rofl
Post by: aldo_14 on October 14, 2002, 03:53:43 pm: Quote
Originally posted by Borealis

ever notice how people who say that always come back? :nod:

I forgot my coat.
Title: Rofl
Post by: Stryke 9 on October 14, 2002, 03:55:48 pm: Pssh, some spam thread. Two whole pages and not one gratuitous goatse.cx link (http://www.goatse.cx) so far!
Title: Rofl
Post by: Razor on October 14, 2002, 06:07:42 pm: I belive that this thread has served it's purpose and it should be OOHOHOWNED don't you think?
Title: Rofl
Post by: Knight Templar on October 14, 2002, 06:08:21 pm: wow..

that was..eyeopening to say the least.. way to go stryke
Title: Rofl
Post by: Stryke 9 on October 14, 2002, 09:32:59 pm: ...

It had a purpose??
Title: Rofl
Post by: Borealis on October 14, 2002, 09:40:29 pm: its purpose was to maximize the paradigm and something something the enigma :p
Title: Rofl
Post by: Stryke 9 on October 14, 2002, 09:57:32 pm: Oh.

Sounds like work.

Let's not do it.
Title: Rofl
Post by: Borealis on October 14, 2002, 10:06:04 pm: let's say we'll do it, not do it, then expend far more effort justifying our procrastination :yes:
Title: Rofl
Post by: Knight Templar on October 14, 2002, 10:19:08 pm: Sounds like someone isn't doing their homework :p
Title: Rofl
Post by: Borealis on October 14, 2002, 10:34:39 pm: My homework's DONE...it's household chores I'm stalling on :nod:
Title: Rofl
Post by: Kamikaze on October 14, 2002, 10:40:20 pm: /me thinks an ownage is to come because of the poor people who clicke the frigging goatsec link.... :nod:
Title: Rofl
Post by: vyper on October 15, 2002, 07:56:42 am: Quote
Originally posted by Borealis

then why am I still so farsighted? :D

Heh, must be just you're pretty eyes are so good.... :wink: *runs*

Back to the main point, did anyone read the bottom bit? As funny as this is, that last part is a tad serious since some strange arseholes in the world still do it...
Title: Rofl
Post by: Stunaep on October 15, 2002, 08:04:39 am: Quote
Originally posted by Stryke 9
Pssh, some spam thread. Two whole pages and not one gratuitous goatse.cx link (http://www.goatse.cx) so far!

:sigh: :shaking: . Jesus CHRIST. Can we just get back to masturbation, please?

for some reason that just sounded wrong
Title: Rofl
Post by: Ulundel on October 15, 2002, 08:40:43 am: good idea
Title: Rofl
Post by: Stunaep on October 15, 2002, 08:49:09 am: technically this isn't masturbation. And WHAT are those blue guys?
Title: Rofl
Post by: Ulundel on October 15, 2002, 08:54:02 am: masturbation -> sex -> a video clip

well...
Title: Rofl
Post by: Stunaep on October 15, 2002, 08:59:25 am: let's not turn this into another word association thread, please.
Title: Rofl
Post by: Ulundel on October 15, 2002, 09:03:09 am: I'm not. Just wanted to point out the link
Title: Rofl
Post by: Kellan on October 15, 2002, 09:42:03 am: Quote
Originally posted by Zeronet

:wtf: Its actually quite a serious matter.

No it's not. Wars are awfully good fun. Would you like some more corned beef and cucumber sandwiches, Biggles? :p

EDIT: Actually, I found the whitehouse.org description of Iraq pretty funny: "...composed mostly of dust mountains, inhabited by millions of Muslamic savages..."

Seriously, anyone who believes stuff that comes off a government page is deluding themselves. But enough of that. This isn't a politics thread. Would you mind terribly passing me the lime cordial?
Title: Rofl
Post by: Zeronet on October 15, 2002, 09:48:25 am: Quote
Originally posted by Kellan

No it's not. Wars are awfully good fun. Would you like some more corned beef and cucumber sandwiches, Biggles? :p

EDIT: Actually, I found the whitehouse.org description of Iraq pretty funny: "...composed mostly of dust mountains, inhabited by millions of Muslamic savages..."

Seriously, anyone who believes stuff that comes off a government page is deluding themselves. But enough of that. This isn't a politics thread. Would you mind terribly passing me the lime cordial?

*hands Kellen a SA80A2, a cleaning manual, some ammo and drops him in the middle of Yemen*

Have fun old chap :p
Title: Rofl
Post by: diamondgeezer on October 15, 2002, 09:50:13 am: Giving him an SA80 is just mean. Steyrs all round, please!
Title: Rofl
Post by: Zeronet on October 15, 2002, 09:52:07 am: It was a SA80A2, nothing wrong with em, cept the squaddies cleaned them wrong. The SA80 is one of the most accurate rifles in the world.
Title: Rofl
Post by: Kellan on October 15, 2002, 09:52:07 am: Quote
Originally posted by Zeronet

*hands Kellen a SA80A2, a cleaning manual, some ammo and drops him in the middle of Yemen*

Have fun old chap :p

All right, I have a manual! I can do anything! :D
Title: Rofl
Post by: Zeronet on October 15, 2002, 09:55:17 am: I dont know about that, you do lack Military training.
Title: Rofl
Post by: Kellan on October 15, 2002, 09:56:33 am: No, you do.
Title: Rofl
Post by: CP5670 on October 15, 2002, 09:58:30 am: Nothing beats the good old hydrogen bomb... ;7

Quote
Muslamic

This really had me laughing... :D
Title: Rofl
Post by: Zeronet on October 15, 2002, 10:00:02 am: Quote
Originally posted by Kellan
No, you do.

I dont, i spent time in the Air Cadets, they had L98s(proper name for SA80). Course they made em semi-auto, mainly for safety reasons.
Title: Rofl
Post by: Kellan on October 15, 2002, 10:00:33 am: CP: I take it you read that article too, then.

National Sport: soccer, and 'martyr-ball'. :p

And apparently the Iraqis are holding hostage billions of barrels of American oil beneath their country too, the bastards. :D
Title: Rofl
Post by: Zeronet on October 15, 2002, 10:01:13 am: Read what Article?
Title: Rofl
Post by: CP5670 on October 15, 2002, 10:01:55 am: Quote
CP: I take it you read that article too, then.

Yeah, I saw that article; some pretty funny stuff... :D
Title: Rofl
Post by: Kellan on October 15, 2002, 10:02:07 am: Quote
Originally posted by Zeronet
Read what Article?

I meant CP, but in the time I took to write my post you interposed one and made things make no sense. No sense at all! :eek:
Title: Rofl
Post by: Kellan on October 15, 2002, 10:03:12 am: Balls, this post makes no sense anymore. Sniip![/size]
Title: Rofl
Post by: CP5670 on October 15, 2002, 10:03:20 am: aah, too many posts coming up simultaneously; this feels like word association... :p

eh? I changed around the post there since you had also changed yours before; I did not originally know you were addressing me. :p :D
Title: Rofl
Post by: Zeronet on October 15, 2002, 10:03:26 am: I bet some crazed individual could make sense out of it somehow.

EDIT: Only 45mins until the X-Ray diffration is finished on the table salt. The joys of work experiance at Daresbury Laboratory :D.
Title: Rofl
Post by: Kellan on October 15, 2002, 10:04:02 am: Quote
Originally posted by Zeronet
I bet some crazed individual could make sense out of it somehow.

I can!

...And you rest your case. :)
Title: Rofl
Post by: Kellan on October 15, 2002, 10:06:49 am: Quote
Originally posted by Zeronet
EDIT: Only 45mins until the X-Ray diffration is finished on the table salt. The joys of work experiance at Daresbury Laboratory :D.

Can you score me some Anthrax? Or methadone? Failing that, Caesium will do.

:devil:
Title: Rofl
Post by: Zeronet on October 15, 2002, 10:10:22 am: I work in the Materials Science Lab, there aint no biological stuff like that. The most deadly thing at Daresbury is the Synchrotron radiation source, if you find yourself inside a hutch when the X-rays are on, your dead within 2 seconds. Its actually quite a dangerous place, with chemicals etc everywhere.
Title: Rofl
Post by: vyper on October 15, 2002, 03:47:44 pm: Quote
Originally posted by Zeronet
I work in the Materials Science Lab, there aint no biological stuff like that. The most deadly thing at Daresbury is the Synchrotron radiation source, if you find yourself inside a hutch when the X-rays are on, your dead within 2 seconds. Its actually quite a dangerous place, with chemicals etc everywhere.

Hey, we've got our very on Gordon Freeman here! :D
Title: Rofl
Post by: Vertigo1 on October 16, 2002, 10:31:26 am: Quote
Originally posted by Grey Wolf 2009
I'm talking about the sheer amoung of propaganda they can fit on one web page.

PETA

Need I say more? ;)
Title: Rofl
Post by: aldo_14 on October 17, 2002, 09:03:03 am: Quote
Originally posted by Kellan

Can you score me some Anthrax? Or methadone? Failing that, Caesium will do.

:devil:

How about aspirin?
Title: Rofl
Post by: Dark_4ce on October 17, 2002, 11:50:20 am: Consume large amounts of chocolate. That will make the hypothalamus secrete more endorphins, a natural pain killer and oppiate...

I think...