Hard Light Productions Forums
Off-Topic Discussion => General Discussion => Topic started by: Unknown Target on December 12, 2002, 04:53:48 pm
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My dad forwards me all sorts of hilarious stuff he recieves from one of his freinds, and this is a particularly hilarious TRUE story:
> > This is a bricklayer's accident report, which was printed in the
>newsletter
> > of the Australian equivalent of the Workers' Compensation board. Had this guy died, he'd have received a Darwin Award for sure.
> >
> > Dear Sir:
> >
> > "I'm writing in response to your request for additional information in
> > Block 3, "Cause of Accident" of the accident report form. I put "poor
> > planning" as the cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation
> > and I trust the following details will be sufficient.
> >
> > I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working
>alone
> > on the roof of a new six story building. When I completed my work, I found
> > that I had some bricks left over which, when weighed later were found to
>be
> > slightly more than 500 pounds. Rather than carry the bricks down by hand,
> > I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a pulley which was attached
>to
> > the side of the building on the sixth floor.
> >
> > Securing the rope at the ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the
> > barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and untied the
> > rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the bricks. You will
> > note in Block 11 of the accident report form, that I weigh 135 pounds.
> >
> > Due to my surprise of being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost my
> > presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say, I
> > proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building. In the vicinity of
> > the third floor, I met the barrel, which was now proceeding downward at an
> > equal, impressive speed.
> >
> > This explained the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken
> > collarbone, as listed in section three of the accident report form. Slowed
> > down slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers
> > on my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley.
> >
> > Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able
>to
> > hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to experience a great deal
> > of pain. At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit
> > the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid of the weight
> > of the bricks, the barrel weighed approximately 50 pounds. I refer you
> > again to my weight.
> >
> > As you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the
>building.
> > In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up. This
> > accounts for the fractured ankles, broken tooth and several lacerations of
> > my legs and lower body.
> >
> > Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the barrel
>seemed
> > to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of
>bricks
> > and fortunately, only three vertebrae were cracked. I am sorry to report,
> > however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks, in pain, unable to move, I
> > again lost my composure and presence of mind and let go of the rope and I
> > lay there watching the empty barrel beginning its journey back down onto
> > me. This explains the two broken legs.
> >
> > I hope this answers your inquiry."
> >
> > --
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Oh deary, deary me...
:lol:
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heh now only if there were a video to go with it...
*heads over to Rotten*
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:wtf:
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i've seen this before, a long, long time ago :)
very nice ;)
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I'd pay money to see that
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:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :fart: :goof:
oops.... chronic gas....
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Originally posted by Stealth
i've seen this before, a long, long time ago
Me too. In portuguese. A loooong time ago.
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Oh... dear... god... :lol:
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This would be absolutely hilarious to watch... :D :D :D
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Originally posted by Styxx
Me too. In portuguese. A loooong time ago.
yeah, now that you mention it... i saw it in Portuguese too
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Originally posted by CP5670
This would be absolutely hilarious to watch... :D :D :D
you have a very disturbed idea of "hillarious"...
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i saw it as a poem in english, in my english school book, this is funny to tough.
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Originally posted by Analazon
you have a very disturbed idea of "hillarious"...
Who, CP? That's the least disturbed thing about him. Actually, I share his opinion in this case.
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:lol: This is from an old folk song about Paddy (or Murphy... cannae remember) the Irish bricklayer. The song, sung with an Irish accent, is about why he won't be in work today and it tells the story of that letter. :D
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Very old, but still very funny. :D
btw, it'd look alot better if you edited out the > marks.