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Off-Topic Discussion => General Discussion => Topic started by: TopAce on October 24, 2003, 05:15:48 pm

Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: TopAce on October 24, 2003, 05:15:48 pm
I know we had had this quite a time ago, but I assume you collected more useful quote since that.

My favourite are:
---
Get a coder, tie him to a chair, and make him try it - Raa tor'h
---
*Gets an FS2 T-shirt with "Available for FREE from me" on it* - WMCoolmon
---
assuming he's a he

but then again if he's not a he he'd be a she so i should not have described him as 'he' in my previous comment

assuming she's a she... - SuperCoolAi
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Thorn on October 24, 2003, 05:23:31 pm
"Shut up! We'll sin if we want!"
I believe that was Shrike.....
That and whats in my sig..
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Martinus on October 24, 2003, 05:25:43 pm
[color=66ff00]I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.
- Spike milligan

Still think this one's brilliant but I'm not sure if you could characterise it as a quote, more of an observation I guess:
Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at an Elingsh uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht frist and lsat ltteer is at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae we do not raed ervey lteter by it slef but the wrod as a wlohe.
[/color]
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: vyper on October 24, 2003, 05:39:46 pm
In my Uni Job -
Female co-worker catches up with a conversation about Dick Van Dyke several minutes late and waves her hand and shouts:
"I don't like dick!!"

In Uni -
Our IM lecturer just started discussing how he was using the clone tool in PSP to remove a small boy from a picture of his trip to Shanghai.
"He's really set himself up for it now hasn't he?" - Stu (crazy man #1)
Later: "I just hope you didn't realise I was going to drop a shocker on you today with that quiz" - Lectuere
"Oh God he's going to drop his boxers!" - Crazy Man #1

HLP:
Like the siggy says -
"phear teh penis" - dg
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: TopAce on October 24, 2003, 05:44:50 pm
Quote
Originally posted by vyper
....
"I don't like dick!!"
.....


:lol:
I understand.
:D
Dick = the tool?
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Turnsky on October 24, 2003, 06:03:14 pm
"I may be Biased, but i like steak" -- Vyper.. (originally from a thread about food i think)
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Petrarch of the VBB on October 24, 2003, 06:03:35 pm
I could quote Spike Milligan and/or Douglas Adams in some sort of international contest, but I'm not going to.
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Galemp on October 25, 2003, 02:12:07 am
*thumbs through book of 1,911 Best Things Ever Said*

"There is no need to do any housework at all. After four years the dirt doesn't get any worse."
-Quentin Crisp
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: kasperl on October 25, 2003, 04:02:22 am
I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.

Albert Einstein (1879 - 1955)



If it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. But the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever.

Woody Allen (1935 - )



Democracy is a device that ensures we shall be governed no better than we deserve.

George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950)



Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind.

Albert Einstein (1879 - 1955), "Science, Philosophy and Religion: a Symposium", 1941



You can't say that civilization don't advance, however, for in every war they kill you in a new way.

Will Rogers (1879 - 1935), New York Times, Dec. 23, 1929



To err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer.

Farmers' Almanac, 1978



In democracy its your vote that counts.; In feudalism its your count that votes.

Mogens Jallberg



To err is human--and to blame it on a computer is even more so.

Robert Orben



It's not the voting that's democracy, it's the counting.

Tom Stoppard (1937 - ), Jumpers (1972) act 1



If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside.

Robert X. Cringely, InfoWorld magazine



I think computer viruses should count as life. I think it says something about human nature that the only form of life we have created so far is purely destructive. We've created life in our own image.

Stephen Hawking (1942 - )



One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up being governed by your inferiors.

-Plato



"Mankind must put an end to war, or war will put an end to mankind."

-John Fitzgerald Kennedy
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Petrarch of the VBB on October 25, 2003, 04:48:00 am
Aha. I might have to take some of those quotes from when you die in OFP.

"When the game is over, the king and the pawn go back in the same box" - Italian Proverb
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Martinus on October 25, 2003, 05:09:15 am
[color=66ff00]"Keep searching for happiness outside yourself because once you become fulfilled, you are no longer profitable to our corporate agenda" - Anonymous
[/color]
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: karajorma on October 25, 2003, 05:51:52 am
Half the world is composed of people with something to say who can't say it. The other half is people with nothing to say who keep on saying it.

Wish I could remember who's quote that was :)
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Petrarch of the VBB on October 25, 2003, 05:55:08 am
Sex is like bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: karajorma on October 25, 2003, 06:17:11 am
They say love is blind...and marriage is an institution. Well, I'm not ready for an institution for the blind just yet. --Mae West

If all the girls attending the Yale-Harvard game were laid end to end, I wouldn't be at all surprised.
-- Dorothy Parker
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Fineus on October 25, 2003, 06:20:02 am
Whats in my signiture - the first from Dirk Gentlys Holistic Detective Agency, the second from a song by Tool.
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: an0n on October 25, 2003, 07:03:16 am
"My house is dirty, buy me a new one" ---- Krusty the Klown

"As the good Lord says, love thy fellow man as you love yourself, unless they are Turks, then kill the bastards" ---- King Richard IV, Blackadder 2(?)

"That would be as hard as finding a piece of hay in an incredibly large stack of needles." ---- Blackadder

Hag: "Two things you must know about the wise woman. First...she is a woman. Second...she is..."
Blackadder: "Wise?"
Hag: "Oh! You know her then?"
Blackadder: "No, just a stab in the dark, which is what you'll be getting in a minute if you don't become more helpful."

"This sounds like a 12 change of underwear trip." ---- Cat, Red Dwarf

"And the raven, never flitting, still is sitting, still is sitting
On the pallid bust of Pallas just above my chamber door;
And his eyes have all the seeming of a demon's that is dreaming.
And the lamplight o'er him streaming throws his shadow on the floor;
And my soul from out that shadow that lies floating on the floor
Shall be lifted---nevermore!" ---- The Raven by Edgar Allan Poe
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: HotSnoJ on October 25, 2003, 07:07:08 am
Quote
Originally posted by Thorn
"Shut up! We'll sin if we want!"
I believe that was Shrike.....
That and whats in my sig..
I think that was directed at me in one of our religion discussion threads. :doubt:

"I don't believe there are any new objections to be discovered to the truth of Christianity, though there may be some art in presenting old ones in a new dress. My faith has been greatly confirmed by the infidel writers I have read. Men may argue ingeniously against our faith, as indeed they may against anything -- but what can they say in defense of their own -- I would carry the war into their own territories, I would ask them what they believe -- if they said they believed anything, I think that they might be shown to be more full of difficulties and liable to infinitely greater objections than the system they oppose and they were credulous and unreasonable for believing it. If they said they did not believe anything, you could not, to be sure, have anything further to say to them. In that case they would be insane, or at best ill qualified to teach others what they ought to believe or disbelieve." ~ Francis Scott Key

Long quote indeed but really good non the less. :nod:
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Martinus on October 25, 2003, 07:08:44 am
[color=66ff00]Heheh Blackadder, must watch that again sometime. :nod:
[/color]
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Killfrenzy on October 25, 2003, 07:25:27 am
"C will eat you, chew you up, and then spit you out again the other side. And that's before it craps on you and walks away without looking back."

- My mate Ray

"I don't mind praying to the eternal father but I seem to be the only man in England plagued with an eternal mother!"

- Edward VII on his mother, Queen Victoria a few years before she died

"The train passed through Bexhill, where I got off. It wasn't easy, the train didn't stop there!"

- Spike Milligan

I'm sure I'll drag some more up later!
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Petrarch of the VBB on October 25, 2003, 08:25:36 am
"At Waterloo station I was given a photograph of Hitler marked 'This is your enemy'. I searched every compartment, but he wasn't on the train."
Spike Milligan.
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Gloriano on October 25, 2003, 08:26:53 am
Quote
And there shall be signs in the sun, and in the moon, and in the stars; and upon the earth distress of nations, with perplexity; the sea and the waves roaring; Men's hearts failing them for fear, and for looking after those things which are coming on the earth : for the powers of heaven shall be shaken” (Luke
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Petrarch of the VBB on October 25, 2003, 08:27:51 am
"The fact that men don't learn from the lessons of history is one of the most important lessons of history"
Douglas Adams
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: an0n on October 25, 2003, 08:49:04 am
Here's a barrell of laughs for you:

Me: Close the door.
Mother: Okay *leaves door open*
Me: Close the ****ing door
Mother: Will do *leaves door open*
Me: *closes door*
Mother: *opens door* I can't close it, my hands are full
Me: *closes door*
Niece: *opens door*
Me: *slams door*
Father: Slam that door again and you can **** off out of here. You can close it, but you don't need to slam it!
Brother:: *opens door*
Me: *closes door as slowly and carefully as possible*
Father: Right, **** off out of [the front room]
Me: *goes into dining room to play SFC3 on laptop*
Father: And you can keep off the computer too
Me: *goes upstair to sleep at 2pm*
Brother:: Get out, I need the room too [inject myself with heroin] in
Me: *goes back on computer and closes dining room door*
Mother: *opens door*
Me: Close the door.
Mother: Okay *leaves door open*
Me: Close the ****ing door
Mother: Will do *leaves door open and starts watching what I'm doing on the computer*
Me: *types out 3 pages of "Fuckoff" in NotePad*
Mother: Childish bastard
Me: *closes door and screams:* I'm freezing ****ing cold, tired, hungry if one more of you stupid ****s leaves the door open I'm nailing it shut using some 6-inch nails and your head
Father: You better not be on that computer, boy
Me: Y'know what? **** it. Come try and stop me you fat, scottish, pie-eatin', faggot, ****head. You can even bring that junkie **** to call the ambulance for you after I snap your fingers off. I ****ing dare you.
Niece: Don't swear *stabs me with a pen*
Me: *makes a note to **** parents up once they're old, feeble and unable to fend for themselves*


Now, where'd I put that knife-sharpener?
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Razor on October 25, 2003, 09:40:12 am
And just to think it all begun with closing the door. It disturbes me that you treat your family like that.  You serriously need help and some time in the cooler. (tm)
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: LtNarol on October 25, 2003, 09:48:14 am
"A wise man speaks because he has something to say; a fool because he has to say something."
- Plato

"... its that one ... where she straightens her back, and purses her lips, and looks around like a rabbit that heard something chasing them."
     - Unnamed lieutenant on the confused look of our beloved C.O.

"Never wrestle with pigs, they enjoy it and you’ll get dirty."
- Fortune Cookie
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: an0n on October 25, 2003, 09:51:07 am
Quote
Originally posted by Razor
And just to think it all begun with closing the door. It disturbes me that you treat your family like that.  You serriously need help and some time in the cooler. (tm)
Be silent, peon.
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Martinus on October 25, 2003, 09:58:05 am
[color=66ff00]Yeah, sounds like the parental units were just being annoying there.
[/color]
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Razor on October 25, 2003, 10:39:33 am
Quote
Originally posted by an0n
Be silent, peon.

Yeah...tell yourself that before you post anything :lol:
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Petrarch of the VBB on October 25, 2003, 10:43:58 am
*tries to find a quote about laughing at one's own jokes*
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: an0n on October 25, 2003, 10:47:01 am
"You're a retard if you laugh at your own jokes" ---- an0n
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Petrarch of the VBB on October 25, 2003, 10:54:48 am
That'll do nicely.
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: kode on October 25, 2003, 11:22:04 am
Quote
Originally posted by Razor

Yeah...tell yourself that before you post anything :lol:


maybe you should listen to your own advice?
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: an0n on October 25, 2003, 11:24:12 am
I swear to God, anyone replies to that with "Maybe YOU should" and some f[color=12039][/color]ucker's getting killed.
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Fineus on October 25, 2003, 11:26:37 am
Calm down :)

And come to think of it an0n, have you ever seen The Breakfast Club?
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: phreak on October 25, 2003, 11:27:41 am
i don't remember it exactly, but i saw it a few days ago walking through the CS building at uni:

"Software is a spell people cast on computers to make them cause errors"
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: an0n on October 25, 2003, 11:27:52 am
I don't watch chick-flicks.
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Nuclear1 on October 25, 2003, 11:40:49 am
I'm a serious nerd for putting this one up.

"In his quest to become more human, he helped us to see the better part of ourselves." --Patrick Stewart
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Fineus on October 25, 2003, 11:51:29 am
Quote
Originally posted by an0n
I don't watch chick-flicks.

:wtf:
Fair enough...
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: an0n on October 25, 2003, 11:58:51 am
"All I ask is a tall ship, and a load of contraband to fill her with..." ---- Quark

"And he piled upon the whale's white hump, the sum of all the rage and hate felt by his whole race. If his chest had been a cannon, he would have shot his heart upon it." ---- Moby Dick

"They invade our space, and we fall back. They assimilate entire worlds, and we fall back. Not again. The line must be drawn HERE. This far NO farther. And I will make them pay for what they've done." ---- Picard
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Nuclear1 on October 25, 2003, 12:04:16 pm
"Mr. Data?"

"Yes, sir?"

"Shut up."

"Yes, sir." -- Picard and Data, following Data's reference to where Starfleet forbids Captains from being on Away missions.
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Petrarch of the VBB on October 25, 2003, 12:09:43 pm
"We're a race of listeners. We... listen" - Soran

"KHAAAAAAAAAAAAN!" - Kirk
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Gloriano on October 25, 2003, 12:16:02 pm
I am the state." - Louis XIV
2. "Workers of the world unite, you have nothing to loose but your chains." - Karl Marx

3. "Tear down that wall, Mr. Gorbachev." - Ronald Reagan, referring to the Berlin Wall

4. "He made the trains run on time." - Anonymous, referring to Mussolini

5. "The sun never sets on the British Empire." - Anonymous

6. "They eat, they sleep, they digest." - Voltaire, referring to monks

7. "Dr. Livingstone I presume." - Henry Stanley

8. "The lights are going out all over Europe..." - Edward Grey at the begining of World War One

9. "Crush the horrible thing." - Voltaire, referring to the Catholic religion

10. "If the war is over then why are those planes flying overhead and why are we in this bunker?" -  
        Molotov, asking Hitler about WWII

11. "Keep the right wing strong." - Schlieffen, referring to his plan

12.  He brought "peace in our time." - Chamberlin, referring to Hitler

13. "And yet it moves." - Galileo, after the Inquisition sentenced him to house arrest (referring to  
      the Earth)

14. "I have but one mistress." - Elizabeth I, referring to England

15. "We will bury you." - Khrushchev, referring to the United States during the Cold War

16. "Smart people can act stupid too."- Zoe, speaking about her friend Julia

17. "Are there any words that end with 'w' ?" - Ellie, referring to Zoe

18. "The sun never sets on the British Empire."- Mike Farnham

19. ".... would pluck out my eyebrows."- Joanne

20. "History is a mystery." - Alex

21. "Scratch my back!"- Tyler, yelling at Leila OR Leila, yelling at Tyler

22. "I love Vaclav Havel!"- Leila


here is some my favorites
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Petrarch of the VBB on October 25, 2003, 12:33:05 pm
Quote
Originally posted by Holy Imperial Gloriano

5. "The sun never sets on the British Empire." - Anonymous

18. "The sun never sets on the British Empire."- Mike Farnham


Ahem.
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: an0n on October 25, 2003, 12:35:17 pm
*remembers another one*

"The sun never sets on the British Empire. But we have been known to take little naps now and then, through the day." ---- an0n

That one had them staring at me for like 5 minutes with blank expressions on their faces.
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Gloriano on October 25, 2003, 12:39:09 pm
"We have resolved to endure the unendurable and suffer what is insufferable."
- Emperor Hirohito


"If they (the young pilots) are on land, they would be bombed down, and if they are in the air, they would be shot down. That's sad...Too sad...To let the young men die beautifully, that's what Tokko is. To give beautiful death, that's called sympathy."
- Admiral Takijiro Onishi (Note: Tokko means suicidal attack in Japanese)


"To let this beautiful Japan keep growing, to be released from the wicked hands of the Americans and British, and to build a 'freed Asia' was our goal from the Gakuto Shutsujin year before last; yet nothing has changed."
- Second Lieutenant Shigeyuki Suzuki (member of a Kamikaze squadron)

"A military man can scarcely pride himself on having 'smitten a sleeping enemy'; it is more a matter of shame, simply, for the one smitten."
- Admiral Isoroku Yamamoto, Commander in Chief of the Japanese Navy (about Pearl Harbor, 1942)


"All men are brothers, like the seas throughout the world; So why do winds and waves clash so fiercely everywhere?"
- Emperor Hirohito (1940)


"The fate of the Empire rests on this enterprise every man must devote himself totally to the task in hand."
- Admiral Isoroku Yamamoto, Commander in Chief of the Japanese Navy (December 7, 1940)

"The mindless rejoicing at home is really appalling; it makes me fear that the first blow against Tokyo will make them wilt at once...I only wish that [the Americans] had also had, say, three carriers at Hawaii..."
- Admiral Isoroku Yamamoto, Commander in Chief of the Japanese Navy (1942)

"The fruits of victory are tumbling into our mouths too quickly."
- Emperor Hirohito (April 29, 1942; his forty-first birthday)


more Quates
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Black Wolf on October 25, 2003, 01:10:28 pm
If we're talking Japanese War Quotes...

"What the F**k was that?" Mayor of Hiroshima, 1945
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: TopAce on October 25, 2003, 02:29:42 pm
I am surprised. There are too few quotes from HLPers.
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: vyper on October 25, 2003, 02:32:43 pm
[q]I am surprised. There are too few quotes from HLPers.[/q]

Meh, we've all become boring recently...
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Zeronet on October 25, 2003, 02:54:20 pm
"Is that you John Wayne, is this me?" Joker, FMJ.

"What aint no country i ever heard of, do they speak english in what?" Jules, Pulp Fiction.
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Hippo on October 25, 2003, 03:12:30 pm
heres one:

[some guy from Stargate]: 'We used the Nquadriak bomb.'

[RDA] 'On people?'

[that same guy] *give disgusted/annoyed stare at RDA*
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Petrarch of the VBB on October 25, 2003, 03:22:55 pm
Ohh yeah, FMJ quotes.

"How can you shoot women and children?"
"Easy, you just don't lead em as much. HAHAHA!"

(I want to see James Brown playing that role)
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: an0n on October 25, 2003, 03:29:56 pm
"We can only hope this will be the last footwear to fall." ---- Thor

Unas to Teal'c: Kill the human.
O'Neill: Excuse me?!

Teal'c: Appearances may be deceiving.
O'Neill: One man's ceiling is another man's floor.
Daniel: A fool's paradise is a wise man's hell.
O'Neill: Never run with...scissors?

Hammond: Colonel, you don't seem to understand how serious this matter is. You and your team have committed a court-martiable offense.
O'Neill: To be fair, General, I did it. Carter and Daniel protested. And Teal'c...well, he really didn't say anything, but I can tell he was opposed to my actions by the way he...cocked his head and raised his eyebrows....

"Hey, Reigar? You know that 'we come in peace' business? Bite me." ---- O'Neill
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Taristin on October 25, 2003, 03:54:56 pm
Quote
Originally posted by an0n
O'Neill: To be fair, General, I did it. Carter and Daniel protested. And Teal'c...well, he really didn't say anything, but I can tell he was opposed to my actions by the way he...cocked his head and raised his eyebrows....


Loved that one. :lol:

"To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, it's half empty. But to the engineer, it's twice as large as it needs to be." - I can't remember...
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Liberator on October 25, 2003, 04:08:06 pm
That avalanche has already started.  It is too late for the pebbles to vote.  -  Kosh
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: an0n on October 25, 2003, 04:08:25 pm
"Fortune is like a lady; She favours the bold." ---- Unknown
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Geezer on October 25, 2003, 05:14:43 pm
Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie!" till you can find a rock.

- Wynn Catlin
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Gloriano on October 26, 2003, 12:15:45 pm
ai to yuki to nokori wo motte tatakauyo

i don't traslate this
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: kasperl on October 26, 2003, 12:22:36 pm
Quote
Originally posted by Holy Imperial Gloriano
ai to yuki to nokori wo motte tatakauyo



care to translate?
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: Gloriano on October 26, 2003, 12:32:21 pm
when everything end's new chapter begins-Great Mystery project

(copyright 2000-2003 Great mystery team)
Title: Quotes thread II
Post by: an0n on October 27, 2003, 10:53:06 am
Quote
Shi> posted the shots from the cams I hid in the lockerrooms