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Off-Topic Discussion => General Discussion => Topic started by: watsisname on February 24, 2007, 01:33:01 am

Title: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: watsisname on February 24, 2007, 01:33:01 am
http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/02/22/porn.sword.ap/index.html (http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/02/22/porn.sword.ap/index.html) :wakka:

Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: Mefustae on February 24, 2007, 01:36:43 am
And that's why most people are so reluctant to act the hero; the large chance that you'll just be making a complete and utter cock out of yourself.

Quote from: Article
The neighbor later played for police the part of the DVD he believed Van Iveren heard downstairs.
Goddamn that would have been embarassing.
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: karajorma on February 24, 2007, 01:49:08 am
You've gotta feel sorry for the guy. After all he did what most of us hope we would do if this was a real rape being committed.
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: watsisname on February 24, 2007, 02:15:50 am
I agree it was good of him to act, but he chose one of the worst possible ways to act.  Granted, I'd have no way of knowing what I'd do in his position, but I'd think knocking first and trying to gather more information about what was going on inside would be my choice.
Oh, and pointing the sword at the guy when he shows no possible way of doing harm was a stupid idea.

On another note:  I wonder what the heck kind of porn the dude was watching if it sounded like that... perhaps he belongs on a special list, lol.
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: redsniper on February 24, 2007, 02:24:02 am
No good deed goes unpunished...
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: karajorma on February 24, 2007, 02:48:32 am
Emphasis on real.

If most of us were convinced that someone was in danger next door I doubt that many of us would calmly knock on the door. To be honest if this guy gets a jury trial he's got a reasonable chance of being found not guilty. All he has to do is play the audio from the porno and convince the jury that it sounded like a woman being attacked.

To be honest I don't know why the guy who was watching the porn is pressing charges. No matter how embarrassing the original situation was, it's going to be a lot more embarrassing repeating it on the witness stand. :)
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: Rictor on February 24, 2007, 07:10:31 am
How does something like this even get on to the news? Are these types of people going out of their way to publicize their blunders, seemingly daily, for our amusement?

With that said, how cool is it that he bust in with a sword. He could have come in with a knife, or even nothing, but instead the guy's like "Oh, a woman is being raped! Where's my trust claymore? For the hooooooorde!"
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: Agent_Koopa on February 25, 2007, 03:47:09 pm
With that said, how cool is it that he bust in with a sword. He could have come in with a knife, or even nothing, but instead the guy's like "Oh, a woman is being raped! Where's my trust claymore? For the hooooooorde!"

Exactly what I was thinking.

*BOOM* *Shing* "WHERE IS SHE?"

And it was a cavalry sword, not a claymore. Wouldn't it be so awesome if the door burst open and he was on a horse too?
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: Bob-san on February 25, 2007, 07:47:56 pm
It woulda been cool if he was in a set of chainmail...

But anyways... we'll just have to see how this plays out; the guy has a solid case to be excused... replay the porno and convince em it sounds like a rape. What better to do when you have no phone? Oh and it looks like he has no life, either... something about living with his mom and has no phone...
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: Cobra on February 25, 2007, 08:04:39 pm
That poor bastard... :lol:
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: Polpolion on February 25, 2007, 08:42:17 pm
I'm sure glad I don't have enough of a spine to be a hero. :nod:
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: MP-Ryan on February 25, 2007, 08:48:40 pm
Think... then act.  Guy had good intentions, but the execution of his grand plan left a little to be desired :P
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: aldo_14 on February 26, 2007, 02:51:21 am
With that said, how cool is it that he bust in with a sword. He could have come in with a knife, or even nothing, but instead the guy's like "Oh, a woman is being raped! Where's my trust claymore? For the hooooooorde!"

Exactly what I was thinking.

*BOOM* *Shing* "WHERE IS SHE?"

And it was a cavalry sword, not a claymore. Wouldn't it be so awesome if the door burst open and he was on a horse too?

No wonder - claymores weigh a fricking tonne.
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: Getter Robo G on February 26, 2007, 09:11:49 am
Imagine the hilarity if the guy defended himself.

"Sorry officer, I was minding my own business (literally) when this medieval nut-job bust in with a sword, so I shot him! Self Defense!"

Would probably fly in Texas! And mass persecution of D&D would insue...

[Edit]: Just for future"heroes", if you are gonna do something even remotely illegal, don't bring your family hierlooms. Buy cheap, easily replaceable gear so you don't get shunned by your mother for losing the family sword to the police evidence vault!!!

DUMBASS!
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: Kie99 on February 26, 2007, 11:06:04 am
If it had been a real rape we'd have been hailing this guy as all kinds of awesome.
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: Cobra on February 26, 2007, 11:28:40 am
No ****? :P
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: redsniper on February 26, 2007, 01:42:50 pm
I'm gonna hail him as awesome anyway and just say he has bad luck. :p
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: Goober5000 on February 26, 2007, 03:44:57 pm
If it had been a real rape we'd have been hailing this guy as all kinds of awesome.
QFT.  He would have gotten a commendation medal or something, too.

The case should be dismissed, and the other guy should be counter-sued for violating some sort of noise ordinance.
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: Snail on February 26, 2007, 03:48:00 pm
Wow. Just proves that being the good guy hero dude just gets you in jail. Every single time.
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: aldo_14 on February 26, 2007, 04:19:07 pm
39 year old, with a sword, living alone with his mother with no telephone?
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: Getter Robo G on February 26, 2007, 04:23:16 pm
Yeah I kicked my mom out at 26...  :nervous:

WHat?

 :lol:
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: redsniper on February 26, 2007, 04:24:22 pm
Well yeah, he's a loser. But charging into someone's apartment with a cavalry sabre to save the day, while very rash and foolish, is still worth probably about 2000 cool points.
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: Harbinger of DOOM on February 26, 2007, 04:31:28 pm
Well yeah, he's a loser. But charging into someone's apartment with a cavalry sabre to save the day, while very rash and foolish, is still worth probably about 2000 cool points.
Agreed.
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: Stealth on February 26, 2007, 05:35:10 pm
Where's my trust claymore? For the hooooooorde!"

Warcraft FTW :D :D :D
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: Stealth on February 26, 2007, 05:38:29 pm
and actually, as embarrassing as it must be, i respect this guy.  how many of us who heard a woman screaming as if she was being raped wouldn't go to her rescue?

ok i know you're all a bunch of scared pussies, so don't answer that question... let's keep it rhetorical ;)
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: Agent_Koopa on February 26, 2007, 06:26:33 pm
Well yeah, he's a loser. But charging into someone's apartment with a cavalry sabre to save the day, while very rash and foolish, is still worth probably about 2000 cool points.

I only wish this sort of thing happened more often.
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: karajorma on February 27, 2007, 06:57:26 am
You do have to question how loud this guy was watching his porn to cause this problem.

I can see why they can't drop the charges if the guy is complaining but I find it hard to believe a jury will ever find this guy guilty unless there is a lot more to the story than we are hearing.
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: Goober5000 on February 27, 2007, 08:27:16 am
I find it hard to believe a jury will ever find this guy guilty
Fat chance, considering how all the intelligent people avoid jury duty like the plague.
Title: Re: Average hero mistakes porn for rape; embarrasment ensues.
Post by: karajorma on February 27, 2007, 11:57:57 am
I took that into consideration. Stupid people will admire all that swordplay stuff. Not to mention forgetting to follow the trial much after they play the porn.

Just get the lawyer to stand next to the jury box whispering "Not guilty" while the porn hypnotises them and it'll be easy to get a walk.