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Off-Topic Discussion => General Discussion => Topic started by: Goober5000 on August 08, 2008, 09:45:02 pm

Title: If a suicide can be awesome, this is it...
Post by: Goober5000 on August 08, 2008, 09:45:02 pm
I think this beats out the superglue-your-hands-to-your-face-and-leap-off-a-tall-building-through-wire trick.  Consider:

1) Man cancels life insurance policy so his wife doesn't get anything.

2) Man ties one end of a very long rope to a tree, and the other end around his neck.

3) Man gets into his £90,000 Aston Martin convertible.

4) Man accelerates at top speed onto a busy highway.

Source: Here (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1042676/Businessman-uses-Aston-Martin-decapitate-horrific-suicide-revenge-ex-wife.html), here (http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,400221,00.html), here (http://news.google.com/news?hl=en&ned=&ie=UTF-8&ncl=1234663252), etc.
Title: Re: If a suicide can be awesome, this is it...
Post by: Flipside on August 08, 2008, 10:58:36 pm
Well, if you're going to go, go in style.

They keep using the same picture of the woman, it's not exactly flattering, I think the subliminal message in those articles is loud and clear ;) I think someone is going to have to find a new source of fake tan.

Edit: I just love the woman behind her, she really is going :wtf:
Title: Re: If a suicide can be awesome, this is it...
Post by: Warp Shadow on August 08, 2008, 11:05:25 pm
The only way that could possibly have been more awesome, is if he removed his eyes and replaced them with smiley face stress balls before bulldozing into traffic. ( and still got the full length of the rope ). Imagine the view from the other driver's perspective:

An expensive convertible comes barelling out from the other lane, straight towards you and the guy inside is screaming at the top of his lungs, swerving in and out of incoming traffic, with a rope around his neck leading off into the neverwhere, and staring out both of his eyesockets are a pair of bright yellow smily faces beaming at you. A headon collision seems unavoidable with this lunatic and you reflexively slam on the brakes, and at the last moment, his head goes sailing clean off, both smileys flying up into the air and his car swerves and barrels off the side of the highway (hopefully off a cliff) and goes *CRUNCH*, lighting on fire and after smouldering for a second, explodes, showering tiny metal fragments all over the highway and pinging off your windshield.

And the best part, just as you pull your arms down from infront of your face and begin to look tentetively around in with the rest of the shocked and jumbled, completely silent drivers, a second goes by and PLOP! With a start you look down in your lap to see a shiny yellow smiley face beaming back up at you.

However, he probably wouldn't have gotten 12 feet without eyes so I still think that's pretty win.
Title: Re: If a suicide can be awesome, this is it...
Post by: Bobboau on August 08, 2008, 11:12:07 pm
he should have set the house on fire first, the parasite will probably be able to get some of that now.
Title: Re: If a suicide can be awesome, this is it...
Post by: Mr. Vega on August 08, 2008, 11:27:22 pm
There's throwing yourself off a cliff and then then there's everything else.
Title: Re: If a suicide can be awesome, this is it...
Post by: FUBAR-BDHR on August 08, 2008, 11:29:11 pm
I was thinking more of leaving the car in the garage thus destroying the house that way. 

Of course the really creative thing would have been to lock the car in the garage, reinforce the garage door, and use a sawsall cut most of the supporting structure to the foundation.  That way the entire house gets pulled off the foundation with the car. 
Title: Re: If a suicide can be awesome, this is it...
Post by: Androgeos Exeunt on August 09, 2008, 12:03:51 am
Eep, dying in style. That's about as grand as wearing a tuxedo to the guillotine. :eek2:
Title: Re: If a suicide can be awesome, this is it...
Post by: Ransom on August 09, 2008, 01:26:16 am
To be fair, wearing a tuxedo to the guillotine is pretty classy
Title: Re: If a suicide can be awesome, this is it...
Post by: karajorma on August 09, 2008, 04:15:55 am
And yet again we see why you should sign a pre-nup if either one of you has any significant assets before you get married.
Title: Re: If a suicide can be awesome, this is it...
Post by: Nuke on August 09, 2008, 04:44:10 am
cool
Title: Re: If a suicide can be awesome, this is it...
Post by: Jeff Vader on August 09, 2008, 04:51:34 am
Excellent! (http://www.billandted.org/sounds/ea/eaexcellent.mp3)
Title: Re: If a suicide can be awesome, this is it...
Post by: Herra Tohtori on August 09, 2008, 07:07:39 am
I think this does fulfill the requirements of being aknowledged as An Hero. :rolleyes:
Title: Re: If a suicide can be awesome, this is it...
Post by: Androgeos Exeunt on August 09, 2008, 07:18:07 am
And yet again we see why you should sign a pre-nup if either one of you has any significant assets before you get married.

I'm lucky, because I'm 17. :D

I think this does fulfill the requirements of being aknowledged as An Hero. :rolleyes:

Surely you mean "A Hero"? ;)
Title: Re: If a suicide can be awesome, this is it...
Post by: Herra Tohtori on August 09, 2008, 07:20:21 am
I think this does fulfill the requirements of being aknowledged as An Hero. :rolleyes:

Surely you mean "A Hero"? ;)

Certainly not. If you are not being sarcastic about this, I can only think of one thing that can explain this comment of yours:

Quote
I'm lucky, because I'm 17. :D

You most get moar XP. ;7
Title: Re: If a suicide can be awesome, this is it...
Post by: BengalTiger on August 09, 2008, 10:53:57 am
I think this beats out the superglue-your-hands-to-your-face-and-leap-off-a-tall-building-through-wire trick.  Consider:

1) Man cancels life insurance policy so his wife doesn't get anything.

2) Man ties one end of a very long rope to a tree, and the other end around his neck.

3) Man gets into his £90,000 Aston Martin convertible.

4) Man accelerates at top speed onto a busy highway.

Source: Here (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1042676/Businessman-uses-Aston-Martin-decapitate-horrific-suicide-revenge-ex-wife.html), here (http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,400221,00.html), here (http://news.google.com/news?hl=en&ned=&ie=UTF-8&ncl=1234663252), etc.

An Aston Martin would make a nice hood ornament... :drevil:
Title: Re: If a suicide can be awesome, this is it...
Post by: Fineus on August 09, 2008, 01:27:42 pm
Sorry, I couldn't resist...  :D

(http://www.averyfinedesign.co.uk/misc/aston.jpg)
Title: Re: If a suicide can be awesome, this is it...
Post by: Goober5000 on August 09, 2008, 01:39:33 pm
You couldn't spell, either, apparently. :p
Title: Re: If a suicide can be awesome, this is it...
Post by: Fineus on August 09, 2008, 02:23:27 pm
****ing sticky keyboard. Honest :P Fixed...
Title: Re: If a suicide can be awesome, this is it...
Post by: Flipside on August 09, 2008, 02:43:19 pm
:lol: