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Off-Topic Discussion => General Discussion => Topic started by: Colonol Dekker on December 03, 2008, 06:59:05 pm

Title: Pondering
Post by: Colonol Dekker on December 03, 2008, 06:59:05 pm
If you throw a cat out a car window, does it become kitty litter?
If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?
If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?
Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon?
What do chickens think we taste like?
What do people in China call their good plates?
What do you call a male ladybug?
What hair color do they put on the driver's license of a bald man?
When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
When they first invented the clock, how did they know what time it was to set it?
Which is the other side of the street?
Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why don't they call mustaches "mouthbrows"?
Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?


Now you guys do some...........
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: Polpolion on December 03, 2008, 07:14:45 pm
If you throw a cat out a car window, does it become kitty litter?

Only if the skin breaks.

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If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?

White, most likely.

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If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?

It depends on how good his sense of balance and agility is.

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Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon?

Yes.

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What do chickens think we taste like?

Do they even have taste buds?

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What do people in China call their good plates?

I don't speak Chinese.

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What do you call a male ladybug?

A ladybug

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What hair color do they put on the driver's license of a bald man?

Natural bald, or shaved bald?

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When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?

A different dog.

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When they first invented the clock, how did they know what time it was to set it?

From sundials, which do not need to be set.

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Which is the other side of the street?

The side you're not on.

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Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Because Noah in all likely-hood never existed.

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Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

Perhaps they need the needles for other stuff, too.

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Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

The glue doesn't dry because it's not exposed enough.

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Why don't they call mustaches "mouthbrows"?

Most likely because the etymology for the two terms is completely different.

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Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?

Same reason we can't shoot people named "Summer" in June->September in the Northern hemisphere.



Literal responses, FTL. Sorry. Couldn't resist. :p
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: Colonol Dekker on December 03, 2008, 07:25:12 pm
Breaking down words into literal nowaday meanings is another thing that catches my attention sometimes...

For instance....................insance: In Stance, what does something being in the correct stance have to do with a single unique event or copy? :confused:
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: Polpolion on December 03, 2008, 07:33:53 pm
Breaking down words into literal nowaday meanings is another thing that catches my attention sometimes...

For instance....................insance: In Stance, what does something being in the correct stance have to do with a single unique event or copy? :confused:

AFAIK that word isn't prefix/root. It's just one thing.
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: Colonol Dekker on December 03, 2008, 07:37:23 pm
Exactly but how did it become that way? Where was it derived from, etc etc...

More pondering,> How come "Final" Fantassy ever had a sequel let alone ten+ (including spin-offs)
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: Retsof on December 03, 2008, 08:31:17 pm
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How come "Final" Fantassy ever had a sequel let alone ten+
I think the company was going out of buisness, so they made the "Final Fantasy."  But Final Fantasy was a hit and saved the company.
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: Scuddie on December 03, 2008, 09:00:07 pm
Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: Polpolion on December 03, 2008, 09:05:34 pm
Because "it" and "phonetic" are two completely different things.
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: tinfoil on December 03, 2008, 09:07:02 pm
Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?
Now you guys do some...........

We don't?... Ahem - i mean, because it's inhumane.
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: DokterBeefcake on December 03, 2008, 09:25:09 pm
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

There is always the possibility for a last minute stay of execution or pardon.

Unlikely, but it's there.

And if they use filthy execution needles that give the man a disease, he can then sue the prison and/or the parties responsible for that prison (the state, the hospital any doctors may be a resident at) and will in all likeliness win their suite.

It's also a matter of dignity and respect.  Yes they're the convicted dead, but above all it's important to maintain fair practice.  It's what separates good people from foolish animals.
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: Mars on December 03, 2008, 09:33:50 pm
At the point the needle is sticking in you, that's a pretty close shave.
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: Retsof on December 03, 2008, 09:35:49 pm
Why do hot dog buns come in packs of eight when hot dogs come in packs of ten?
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: Bluecap on December 03, 2008, 09:39:33 pm
If you throw a cat out a car window, does it become kitty litter?

The real question is, when the cat smashes into the window of the car behind you, will the driver maintain control and not get into a fatal car accident, and will they realize they can take you to court for a sizable sum?
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: Colonol Dekker on December 03, 2008, 09:44:08 pm
If they can still retain cognitive function i guess...:nervous:


The term "afoot" as in.... "the game's afoot watson" what the freakin heck does that mean?



EDIT-- Just realised, Game as in "hunting target" and afoot means... It's legging it. as in "on foot"

Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: Bluecap on December 03, 2008, 09:48:24 pm
I admire Watson. Always been dragged all over the place by Sherlock, always having Sherlock's thinking go waaaay over his head.

Kind of like the loyal hound dog. He doesn't know what his master is up to, but damn, he's happy.
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: Kosh on December 03, 2008, 10:43:16 pm
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Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?


Better question: why did Noah take along carpenter ants and termites even though they build their nests in and eat wood respectively?
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: Bluecap on December 03, 2008, 10:53:57 pm
Now you guys do some...........

If you don't have it, at all, can you ever even get it?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Af1OxkFOK18 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Af1OxkFOK18)
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: ssmit132 on December 04, 2008, 06:06:35 am
Why do hot dog buns come in packs of eight when hot dogs come in packs of ten?

Just buy ten packs of buns and eight packs of hot dogs. Then you will have even amounts of buns and hot dogs.

What happened to Harold Holt?
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: Solatar on December 04, 2008, 02:42:34 pm
Does the one eyed one horned flying purple people eater eat purple people or is he purple himself?
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: Bluecap on December 04, 2008, 03:25:56 pm
Does the one eyed one horned flying purple people eater eat purple people or is he purple himself?

My vote's on him eating one-eyed one-horned flying purple people.
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: Solatar on December 04, 2008, 04:15:36 pm
So the people of Earth are safe. :P
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: Colonol Dekker on December 04, 2008, 04:54:49 pm
Until genetic engineering goes awry. . . Why is it called engineering when all they're doing is effectively a DNA collage. If they made the helix' from constituant materials then the title engineer would be worthy. :p
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: tinfoil on December 04, 2008, 10:44:49 pm
why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: Solatar on December 04, 2008, 10:46:23 pm
If it was now I'd say so that if they survived and sustained head injury they would sue...not sure about the 40's though.
Title: Re: Pondering
Post by: BrotherBryon on December 04, 2008, 11:24:48 pm
why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Do you have any idea how cold it is at high altitudes with out a pressurized cockpit?