Hard Light Productions Forums
Off-Topic Discussion => General Discussion => Topic started by: Marcov on December 23, 2009, 09:50:52 am
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This is just a game wherein you describe the person who posts above you then frag him in any Freespace way. First, pick an FS ship then describe the person above you; then FRAG 'em.
For example,
Member A picks a GTF Ulysses.
Member B: I pick a Colly.
Member A, you look cool.
"turns ship around then crushes Member A with Colly"
or something like that. Be creative :)
Ok I'll start (I pick a GTD Orion, pretty tough ain't it)
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I pick a Medusa.
Marcov, you look blue.
"Blows off Marcov's bridge"
PWNED.
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I pick a Perseus.
Titan, you look white.
"Jams a Harpoon up Titan's Weapons Subsystem."
Yeah what. ;7
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:eek:
I pick an Aeolus.
Dilmah, you look like you see a cliche.
"IMMA FIRIN MAH LAZAH!!!"
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I pick a Ravana.
Titan, you look weak.
"Violates Titan through every Flak Cannon."
;)
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I PICK LE CENTAUR
Dilmah you look like all your missions are madcap BoEfests with more dialogue than a production of Waiting for Godot
*forcibly rearms Dilmah*
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I pick the SpaceHunk
Battuta you need to get ripped.
*explodes on Battuta*
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I pick the SJD Sathanas.
Snail, I want to kiss your feet.
*rams Snail into a million directions*
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I pick the SF Mara (terran)
Androgeos, you look speedy
"DIVES DIVES DIVES and smacks Androgeos from behind."
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I pick a ship equipped with Slammer missiles.
Dilmah G, Gen Battuta, Snail, Androgeos and Titan are now looking very exploding.
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I pick countermeasur-
Oh, snap.....
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I PICK LE CENTAUR
Dilmah you look like all your missions are madcap BoEfests with more dialogue than a production of Waiting for Godot
*forcibly rearms Dilmah*
SHADDUP. I LIKE BOE's. If you can't read the dialogue in mission, that's your problem! :P
I pick the Erinyes.
Titan, I think you look Shivan.
"Dilmah makes Titan disappear."
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I pick the GTD Bastion as it was armed to detonate the Epsilon Pegasi to Capella Node.
You are all screwed.
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I pick a Ravana.
Zacam, you look fat.
"BEAMZ zacam"
I'm sitting at school in my study hall with nothing to do. :P
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If Capella was a ship, I could pick that instead.
So I'll just be the Lucifer and you don't get to go home in your lifetime.
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I pick the GTD Morality.
Zacam, you look wealthy.
*Sues Zacam into oblivion*
Guess the reference?
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Commander Zane, you look tasty.
*chooses Psamtik and begins plasma core insertion for some Zane-e-que*
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Esarai . . . . . . Zod scumbags must die.
I choose the Iceni.
CD incites a rebellion that results in the slaughter of millions of your kind.
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I choose a couple Mjolnirs.
Dekker, you look... pwned.
Heh, this makes me realize how FS is balanced, there's nothing really invincible.
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i choose ssj dante
you all look sucks
everyone gets a beam cannon enema...
..oh and the universe also implodes
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I choose the Sandwich.
REVENGE FOR ALL MY FALLEN COMRADES BY YOUR JAWS!
*Beamz Nuke*
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I choose the escape pod.
Commander Zane, you *static*
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You all look base.
I spy all of you on my array of linked Oculii. Everybody receives a free SSM delivered barrage of Meson Bombs.
I have set you all up the bomb.
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I pick the game.
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I choose the Transcendant's Pegasus.
Titan: You have lost it.
/me makes Titan disappear, becoming part of his enslaved army of ships.
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Nice.
I pick Lt. Marcel Sunder's Herc II.
Rhymes_With_PSYCHO, you are free.
*Kills the Transcendant*
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I pick a Dragon.
Any Herc II ever devised not flown by QD will die to a dragon.
*Blows Zane out of space*
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i pick an anubis
oh ****!
*tries to hide behind a colossus, but is too slow, the dragon flys on by and crashes into the colossus's hull*
*oh and its set to insane btw*
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I pick a GTNB Pharos.
Nuke, you look explody. :P
*Marks a place for Nuke to go, and be greeted by a jumping Sathanas*
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I pick a Gargant :drevil:
Commander Zane, you look fat.
"Gargant warps out, crushing the Sathanas in the process, but Pharos is still alive (Pharoses don't collide :D)"
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I pick the Volition Pirate Ship
Marcov, you look like fishbait. :3
Arrrrwalktheplank
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I pick the Knossos.
watsisname, you're too low-poly.
*crushes watsisname by rotating*
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I pick the Meson Bomb.
Androgeos Exeunt, you make me dizzy.
*Vaporizes with increased technobabbylon particles*
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I pick the GTSC Faustus.
Zane, you look particulate.
*scans Zane until he diffuses*
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I pick the Spacesuit.
MP-Ryan, you look boardable.
*Boards the Faustus, and slaps MP-Ryan a few times before throwing him in the reactor.*
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I pick the Apollo
"They're following me...i just know it"
*leads shivans to Dilmah G*
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I choose Super Shivan and land on Firespawn's Apollo.
"You look surprised to see me"
Haymakers his fighter a couple times till he loses control and collides with a passing Typhon.
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I pick SSJ Gigas
StarSlayer you look like a pixel
Penetrates everyone with his giant gigas cock.
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wat.
I pick the Colossus
Hero_Swe, you could use some smacking.
*COLOSSUS HOMERUN SMACK!*
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I pick the Earth model.
watsisname looks YUMMEH.
*Noms watsisname with lack of collision model*
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I pick a waypoint.
Commander Zane, you look extremely unoptimized and have terrible maps.
*leads Zane-Earth into a black hole*
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I pick salt
Snail, you look disgusting. I do not want to eat you.
*salt's Snail*
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Hero_Swe, you look soluble.
I choose water.
*Dissolves Hero_Swe*
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I pick Capella's Sun
esarai is too cool for skool
*Evaporates esarai*
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Thread concept derail. :lol:
I pick the Sathanas fleet.
Axem, you look like a worthy test subject.
*Forces Axem to go supernova*
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I pick a jumpnode.
Zane, prepare to be isolated.
*destabilises and keeps Commander Zane in one star system*
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I pick the Ancient device on Dakara
Bow down to me Androgeos for I am your God!
*exterminates all life in the galaxy*
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I pick the Amazon unmanned drone.
Swe, you're looking positively megamaniacal.
*Destroys device*
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I pick a Watchdog
Scotty your ship sucks.
*blows up Scotty*
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I pick a Shivan Communications Node.
Snail, you're in my way! D:
I have the freewill to do what I want, but I choose to rotate!
*rotates menacingly*
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I choose the SF Aeshma.
watsisname, I don't know where you come from.
*peeks at the crystal at the centre of the Shivan Comm Node*
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ooooohohoho it tickles! D:
*Watsisname Self Destructs*
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I choose the GTD Aquitaine.
Andro, prepare to be consumed by the blindspots in my Anti-Fighter Armament. :D
*Yaws and smashes Androgeos to oblivion with his huge Engine Subsystem*
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i choose the gtva valhalla
i see they pulled the old ships out of mothballs for my target practice
*lets loose a fury of patricle laden railgun blasts thanks to unofficial and incomplete engine code, as well as a meson torp or two*
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I choose Admiral Petrarch
Narrates some suitably unfortunate end for Nuke.
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I choose Alzheimers.
Petrach, you look old.
"Makes Petrach clueless"
For the record, my greatgrandmother has alzheimers.
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I pick modern medicine.
Titan, you look like gray jello
"Sticks a scalpel in Titan"
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I pick rock.
Titan, you lose.
*Ziame wins over Titan*
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I pick a jackhammer.
Ziame, you're looking rather immobile.
*Breaks Ziame with jackhammer*
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I man the bridge of a Gigas.
Scotty drills ineffectively against my ship's absurd HP.
*Unleashes a beam cannon lightshow that could wreck an entire fleet onto Scotty.*
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/me chooses lack of bill payments.
Looks like you can't power your systems anymore.
/me watches the GIGAS get caught in the gravity of a nearby star and drift slooooooowly towards it ;7
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Marcov chooses monkey.
Colonel Dekker, you look ugly.
*Colonel Dekker tries to bankrupt Marcov but ends up annoyed because Marcov is a monkey and doesn't know about money.*
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I choose a pie
Marcov, you look monkeyish! (lolwut)
*drowns Marcov in pie*
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I choose slapstick comidian
Ziame you look aerodynamic
*throws Ziame in comedian's face*
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FireSpawn, you look speciesist.
*chooses NTF officer, recruits and assigns FireSpawn to the 42nd Red Shirts as Beta 4*
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esarai you suck
I choose the Amaterasu
I blow **** up lol.
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Snail you look sticky.
*chooses GTNB Pharos and survives explosion*
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Marcov, you look stationary.
*chooses TC 2 to put you in so I can take you back to base and disassemble you*
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I pick the Poseidon.
Silly High Max, you pick a cargo container and no ship to hold it with? :P
*Takes the TC 2 holding the GTNB Pharos and takes it back to base to disassemble the Pharos instead*
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I pick a GTCv Deimos, three Tritons and four wings of Perseus fighters.
Commander Zane, you look busy.
*Proceeds to raid the base and steal the booty*
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I pick a wing of Argos.
esarai, looks like you are on a raid.
*Takes over esarais' base and waits for him to come sailing in with the loot
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I pick a wing of Argos.
esarai, looks like you are on a raid.
*Takes over esarais' base and waits for him to come sailing in with the loot
I pick GTVA Command
pilots you seem to need instructions
Comes up with a set of tactical orders that inadvertently leads to the demise of The E's entire flotilla.
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I pick FRED 2.
StarSlayer needs vacation.
*Takes the persona of Command and attemts to thwart Alpha 1*
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I pick notepad.
Commander Zane needs no GUI program.
*Attempts to bypass FRED with notepad but failed to capture Pharos because I thought I was restricted to using only one FS2 object at one time* :p
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I pick BSOD.
Commander. . . Your OS is flawed.
Ctrl alt del that **** ;)
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I choose prohibiton.
Dekker you can no longer drink booze.
Destroys ALL of Dekker's alcohol.
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Ack!
The last of my weaknesses.
:warp:
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I choose the Deus Ex Machina Bosch Beer fleet!
Firespawn, you look like you just had an Admiral stick it to the man.
"runs firespawn's blockade to aid Dekker"
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I pick Minute Maid Orange Tangerine.
BillyTitan, your mom's right! New Minute Maid Orange Tangerine has three times the calcium as milk!
*mixes and distils Bosch Beer with a tanker full of Minute Maid Orange Tangerine*
Yeah.
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I pick the door.
Andro, show yourself out.
*Opens himself*
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I pick Head-On.
Dilmah, you don't have it. :P
*applies directly to the forehead and headbutts the door open*
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That door looks mighty...
Flammable.
I choose napalm.
*Burns the door to ashes*
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I take a water-gun. Err wait, wasn't this supposed to be FreeSpace frags ?
Well well... then i get a big ship full of water (let's say the Sanctuary) and crash it on you !
*KBOO... I meant, KPLOOOF!*
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I choose H1N1.
Firartix, you look sick.
*Infects him with H1N1*
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I choose H5N1
Stormkeeper, Birds > Pigs at spreading disease.
*mutates into a supervirus and infects everyone*
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Snail, you look confined to the biosphere of the nearest planet.
I choose Arcadia. We'll blow up anything that approaches the airlock.
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Hah! That one's pretty easy.
I choose the Col... err, the SSJ Gigas
It'll attempt to dock with the station (or maybe it is the other way around ?), answer to your fire, and kill you.
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Firatix, you look large.
I pick a subspace tunnel.
*Opens up and forces Firatix to go inside, then seals off, traping Firatix in subspace forever :D*
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Marcov, you look shiny
I choose Meson Bomb.
Boom. Bye-bye subspace tunnel.
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Boom. Bye-bye subspace tunnel.
So you just released Firatix :lol:
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Oh, the above guy is me.
Marcov, you look long.
I pick a Gargant loaded with Meson Bombs
*self-destructs*
*you are all screwed*
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I chose recon Pegasus.
Confirms Marcov's fiery Meson death
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I choose 'Windmills'
You don't appreciate command enough.
*Messes with your emotional wellbeing*
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I choose one of my BoE's.
Firespawn, prepare to drown in my dialogue.
*Firespawn's messages are covered by copious amounts of wingman dialogue*
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I choose one of my missions.
Nothing happens.
*Everyone gets bored to death*
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i choose a container of margarita salt
snail you look like a whiny emo gastropod with a shell
*me dumps the entire container of salt on the slimy sob, then smashes his shell with a hammer so theres nowhere to hide*
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I'm curious how many times Snail has had salt dumped on him. :P
I pick the laws of atomic physics.
Nuke, you look fissionable.
*detonates Nuke*
YOU CAN'T KILL ME, I'M THE LAWS OF PHYSICS, ****!
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You look tasty.
/me uses the balloon pipe thing from Mars Attacks . . .
Dekker Inhales the blast and talks with a high pitched voice. . .
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I follow the instructions.
* Colonol Dekker's fighter suddently explodes *
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I choose a virus.
*invades Firatix's computer and FreeSpace gets uninstalled*
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i choose swine flu
i smell bacon
*marcov turns into a pig and dies of respiratory failure*
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I choose Bird Flu
I smell chicken wings.
*Nuke turns into a chicken*
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i choose a french restaurant
you look tastey
*nuke orders escargot*
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I choose a health inspector.
That dish looks diseased and horrible
*shuts down restaurant*
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Pikachu, I choose you!
Scotty that health inspector looks like a team rocket agent.
Pikachu used generic lightning based attack on Scotty
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Pikachu, I choose you!
Scotty that health inspector looks like a team rocket agent.
Pikachu used generic lightning based attack on Scotty
Pikachu, you look unrealistic.
*chooses a mad, retarded guy with a huge club then bashes the TV where Pikachu is in*
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I choose a GTSC Faustus experimenting with a new node-less warp technology.
*calculates warp trajectory* MMM YES.
Now, onward to the Vega system! :D
*Warps ontop of Marcov's house*
OOPS I FORGOT TO CARRY THE ONE LOL
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I choose the WTF Universe.
Yeah well, for some unknown stupid/realistic reason, the Universe decide you can't go in subspace without node anymore.
You're stuck into subspace for eternity.
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I choose Mr. T.
Firartix, you look outgunned.
"Knocks WTF Universe into next dimension with his mohawk:
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I choose Mr. T.
Firartix, you look outgunned.
"Knocks WTF Universe into next dimension with his mohawk:
I choose a Shivan.
"BEAMZ Mr. T"
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I choose time. Eventually, you wear out and die.
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I pick the Tardis.
Haha thesizzler, I can go anywhere in time with this.
*Reverses time*
Wait...why would I want to do that---
*Also gets BEAMZ by Shivan*
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I choose Alpha One.
You know what happens next.
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You get wiped out by a triple-A beam?
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FFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUU--
*Alpha One was killed by an AAA beam from friggin nowhere*
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I choose fire-beam-subsystem-AAA
General, you look weak
*General Battuta gets destroyed by an SGreen*
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I pick Debug Laser.
Killer Whale, you need moar overcharge.
*Fires at the SGreen but cannot see where the projectiles are going*
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I choose recession.
Commander Zane you can't afford to pay your bills.
*Cuts power to your PC*
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I choose targeting laser.
FireSpawn you are blinded.
FS: You were killed by an intricate collision with enigmaticEntity...
eE: You were killed by a toasty collision with FireSpawn...
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Guys, you look like you need to earn your basic pilot wings.
I choose the TSM series missions.
Instructor gets his revenge and toasts you both with fuzzy logic powered simulation lazzorrs.
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I choose GTVA personnel management, I assign a continuous stream of dumb as a stump annoying space cadets to Dekker for training. Eventually out of frustration and disgust he kamikazes himself into the side of a GTDr Amazon Advanced.
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i choose R. Lee Ermy
you look like a maggot
*me sends r lee ermy to whip the recruits into shape*
"I'm gonna give you three seconds--exactly three ****ing seconds--to wipe that stupid lookin' grin off your face, or I will gouge out your eyeballs and skull **** you!"
*starslayer ****s up, and gets skull****ed*
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*Starslayer squints real hard and cuts off nuke's wang*
*nuke bleeds out*
Yeah that was a dickhead move on my part, no pun intended:D
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I choose Billy Mays.
HI BILLY MAYS HERE! IF YOU'RE HAVING PROBLEMS WITH A REBELLIOUS STAR, THEN YOU NEED STARSLAYER! IT'S GOT THE POWER TO BREAK DOWN AND DISSOLVE A STAR THE SIZE OF CANIS MAJORIS WITHOUT THE RISK OF A BLACK HOLE OR SUPERNOVA. CALL NOW AND GET THE STARSLAYER FOR ONLY $1999.
*StarSlayer is deafened by Billy Mays and drenched in his saliva*
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I choose the mute button.
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...
... ... ... ... ... ... ...
*... ... ... ...*
*Commander Zane becomes unmuted but cannot remember he would trump Snail*
Oh well.
I pick a Blackshark Missile.
It's like dividing by zero!
*Snail is sucked into the singularity, singularity explodes seconds later*
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I choose th Naggarok from cataclysm.
"You are what all life is to us - food!"
*you all get beastified*
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I love your sig bro.
But you smell like non-freespace-turdurken.
/me unleashes the carnivorous giant shivan-space crack fuelled subspace chicken
you get BUCK-KAWWED!
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i choose the carl trap i drew on the hlp station
you look like you really want that bagged lunch hanging suspiciously on the string
*cd gets shredded by nuke warhead tipped bullets fired from a large gatling gun*
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I choose Dr Manhattn.
Your nuke tipped bullets get reduced to atoms before they hit and the bagged lunch gets eaten.
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FireSpawn, you look ready for some extreme conspiracies.
I choose Veidt (aka Ozymandias) and set up an elaborate scheme to make it look as if Manhattan just blew up every single major city in the world so that the whole globe hate his ass and forces him into a distant galaxy.
The world is safe once again.
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I choose a fuzzy.
Esarai, you look like you want to touch a fuzzy.
*Esarai gets dizzy*
lolwut
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I choose sanity.
watsisname, you're looking nonsensical.
*watsisname vanishes in a puff of logic*
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i choose drunkenness
iron beer, you look like a very metal brewski
iron beer is consumed (along with many of his brothers) in a 7 hour long binge that ends with me in a puddle of vomit.
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Nuke, you look intoxicated and about ready to pass out.
I summon the police and Nuke is arrested for public intoxication.