Hard Light Productions Forums
Off-Topic Discussion => General Discussion => Topic started by: NGTM-1R on February 24, 2010, 04:19:18 pm
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After surveying the recent disaster of a relationship advice thread, I want empirical evidence anybody here is qualified to speak before the next one rolls around.
'fess up you slackers!
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I confess that I was not qualified to speak... but then I didn't did I?
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Nothing. Still hopeful, and probably closer than I've been for a long time, but I don't want to push things.
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dating, six years,
Has its ups and downs,
like all things in life :)
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3-months? Personally, I consider anything under 6 months to be a "fling" and not really a relationship.
Also, why is there nothing between 3 months and engaged? That's a little effed up.
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I've seen people date for years and not get engaged. That list is a little short for the longer relationships.
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Brief dating.
1 to 10 months, sometimes parallel.
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IMHO: ought to be like nothing, brief dating, six months, 1-2 years, 2+ years, engaged, married
:P
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Which may speak to some poll maker's experience......
*runs*
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Relationships are no bueno.
Lots of sex is muy bueno.
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The two are not remotely incompatible.
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Except for when they are. And I can tell you all about that misery. >.<
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3-months? Personally, I consider anything under 6 months to be a "fling" and not really a relationship.
Also, why is there nothing between 3 months and engaged? That's a little effed up.
I've seen people date for years and not get engaged. That list is a little short for the longer relationships.
Three months is, I think, a suitable time to demonstrate sustained commitment. I'm trying to gauge if a person is capable of sustained commitment without driving their significant other crazy.
...so three months is all I assume I need to prove or disprove that point. If you have a different view on proving or disproving it, please say so.
I will change the pole to better convey my point. :P
Which may speak to some poll maker's experience......
Nine months. :p
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I did say so. Calling 3 months of commitment a relationship is just silly. Especially as age increases and one graduates from high school.
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Why? Why is three months too much of an arbitrarily small amount to be considered a relationship? Hell, if you're going out for one month, there are still relations there. Hence, the term relationship.
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For the same reason that 10 years is a ridiculously long time to a 20 year old, but not to a 70 year old.
3 months to a 12 year old might be a significant amount of time for a relationship to go on, but at 25?
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I did say so. Calling 3 months of commitment a relationship is just silly. Especially as age increases and one graduates from high school.
I changed it again before you posted.
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Ooh, good avoidance of arbitrary time limits.
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Stop slandering women, all of you. Coming from someone who is actually friends with a number of them, maybe if you weren't sexist assholes then the ones worth knowing might actually talk to you. From my experience the average woman is a hell of a lot nicer and more trustworthy than the average man. Probably (in real world, everyday terms) smarter too. Whatever. Blame me for having a feminist of a mother. And two older sisters who were ridiculously successful out of high school - I'm pretty much the black sheep of the family.
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Oh, and by the way, stop slandering women, all of you. Coming from someone who is actually friends with a number of them, maybe if you weren't sexist assholes then the ones worth knowing might actually talk to you.
Quoted for goddamn truth.
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Actually I was with him until he started claiming that women were nicer or more trustworthy cause it's ridiculous to make assumptions like that about people based on their gender.
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I'd like to think my prejudice isn't as bad as theirs'. I don't think men suck. But if you put two strangers in front of me, one man and one women, held a gun to my head, and told me to guess which one was more trustworthy, say you'll shoot if I guess wrong, and (as far as I know) all other things being equal? I'd pick the woman without a second thought. That's just what my experience has taught me.
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Actually I was with him until he started claiming that women were nicer or more trustworthy cause it's ridiculous to make assumptions like that about people based on their gender.
You're correct, and that's the opinion I hold too - true gender equality is the goal, not just a polarity flip. Editing previous post to exclude that bit.
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*Sigh* They deserved to have that thrown in their faces regardless.
But fine. Rationally and morally? Yes, I don't think either gender is superior. We're two halves of the same coin of humanity, different but equal, and both as important to the whole. Things get very ****ed up when you start putting one above the other. A lot of people, men and women, would be happier if that that fact was embraced. But again, hold a gun to my head, and there's no doubt who I'd pick. I have the right to say that.
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I'm not trying to be a sexist asshole. Seriously, ask any woman that knows me in person, and they'll tell you I'm one of the nicest guys around.
I just happen to like NSA sex a lot more than having to be involved with one person only. I've got a regular group of girls I go out and drink with, go off-roading, shooting, etc. with that I'm no way involved with on a sexual basis, but just as friends with similar interests. And most of them are in committed relationships or married.
I just can't stand most single women though...sorry, but being cheated on 17 times in the past 3 years (yes, exactly 17), I've just gotten sick of that ****.
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Something I'm noticing with this tread and the previous one especially is that some folks seem to think a relationship is about getting in her pants. If thats what your looking for thats fine, but a long term sustainable relationship? That's more about finding someone you enjoy being with and who makes you feel alive. If you're trying to strike up a relationship solely for getting it on, or at least with it being the high priority then its not going to work. You can't keep that fire burnin' just on lust.
Now I'm not bagging on casual sex but you need to recognize what you're actual objective is and plan accordingly before you engage.
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Wow, I'm frankly amazed by these last few threads. Maybe a lot more of you would have a woman in your life if you didn't try to treat it like you're shooting a frakking porno. Let's try to keep the sexes equal here, if these conversations must occur. I've got some great female friends that I'm not dating and I don't try to get in their pants every time I see them. Turns out it helps. Just my $0.02
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Problem with this thread is that there is little correlation between the poll and the opinions.
I think if there was you'd find that the people with the sexist opinions were also usually the ones in the brief relationships or no relationship at all.
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You're not calling me sexist are you?
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Nope.
There's nothing wrong with liking NSA sex but some of us prefer something more. And to be honest it sounds like you do too but are just sick of trying and not getting it.
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Oh, and by the way, stop slandering women, all of you. Coming from someone who is actually friends with a number of them, maybe if you weren't sexist assholes then the ones worth knowing might actually talk to you. From my experience the average woman is a hell of a lot nicer and more trustworthy than the average man. Probably (in real world, everyday terms) smarter too. Whatever. Blame me for having a feminist of a mother. And two older sisters who were ridiculously successful out of high school - I'm pretty much the black sheep of the family.
Edit- I'm going to go ahead and retract this partly; see the following posts.
clicky (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_wq8N-2__E)
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And to be honest it sounds like you do too but are just sick of trying and not getting it.
Yeah, pretty much.
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Oh, and by the way, stop slandering women, all of you. Coming from someone who is actually friends with a number of them, maybe if you weren't sexist assholes then the ones worth knowing might actually talk to you. From my experience the average woman is a hell of a lot nicer and more trustworthy than the average man. Probably (in real world, everyday terms) smarter too. Whatever. Blame me for having a feminist of a mother. And two older sisters who were ridiculously successful out of high school - I'm pretty much the black sheep of the family.
Edit- I'm going to go ahead and retract this partly; see the following posts.
clicky (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_wq8N-2__E)
C'mon. You can find a better song than that.
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Married. Best advice I can give is two-fold:
1. Realize that the whole world doesn't find geek topics as fascinating as you do.
2. Talk to women like they are human beings, and listen when they talk to you.
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Oh, and by the way, stop slandering women, all of you. Coming from someone who is actually friends with a number of them, maybe if you weren't sexist assholes then the ones worth knowing might actually talk to you. From my experience the average woman is a hell of a lot nicer and more trustworthy than the average man. Probably (in real world, everyday terms) smarter too. Whatever. Blame me for having a feminist of a mother. And two older sisters who were ridiculously successful out of high school - I'm pretty much the black sheep of the family.
Edit- I'm going to go ahead and retract this partly; see the following posts.
clicky (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_wq8N-2__E)
C'mon. You can find a better song than that.
david allen coe has a song for everything, why would i pick something else :D
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If only he didn't suck.
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If only he didn't suck.
i think your racist against rednecks
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i think your racist against rednecks
I don't think rednecks are a race.
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i think your racist against rednecks
I don't think rednecks are a race.
Okay, that was clearly a joke.
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With Nuke, how can you be sure?
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Single at the moment, but have been in a couple short relationships.
Didn't contribute in the other thread since, well, it was locked by the time I found it, but I wouldn't have said anything anyways since gender issues seems to be a radioactive subject around here.
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aside from the time i was screwing my brothers wife, i havent had a relationship last longer than 3 weeks. frankly im too mind****ed to associate with other humans.
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I go to great lengths to avoid getting into relationships, which is easy if you want to be an arsehole about it, but nopt sdo much f you're a decrnt bloke I reckon. Honestly, the whole idea of the emotional interdependence of the thing just seems ridiculous to me. Doesn;t stack up[ in basic cost-benefit analyses.
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Personal preference, I am in the "commited, not sexist, niceguy(ish)" group :p
I'm not with my girlie because I need her, but because I love being around her, I'm totally fine when I'm not, but she lights me up <3
Honestly, after having had several 'long term' or 'mid-term' relationships and more flings.. you should probably pay attention when I say; Everyone, is different.
Each girl I've been with have had different triggers, different things they found resistable/irritating, pretty much all guys I know are the same too.
Over time my tastes have changed too (although that said...).
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Two topics wasn't enough of proof that these topics are as good to have around as politics?