Hard Light Productions Forums
Off-Topic Discussion => General Discussion => Topic started by: bahijal74 on October 20, 2010, 11:09:11 pm
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I have a bandaged badly cut thumb so I am not goign to focus too much on my typoes sorry)
ADMINS AND EVERY THIS I SALSO A REMINDER TO ME TO READ TH ENEXT FEW DAYS SO I DON'T LOSE SIGHT OF WHAT I NEED TO GET DONE. SO PLEASE DON'T DELETE THANK YOU
Well if anyone would like to know...I have had many personal problems and events that have kept me from HLP and even FS2. sadly, it looks like worse and greater problems may arise soon. these may include not having a shelter to live under...to...in soem wrose case swcenario...ajil (unlijkely but ive made sure to know how BAd things could get) not saying i have done anything illegal..but yeah trust me moving on... plus my own emotional balance.....I am broke as well and still in need of money to pay for important things.
The chief among those is... well I need help...menatlly. Not jokingly I really do need it for many things
One of these issues, which i am proud to say i have kept a handle of here in these forums..at least..is I am a compulsive liar in a certain style. not always lying or lying to get attention etc. but I lie and BELIEVE th elies and thusly create a world to support said lie etc...too bad i cant focus enough to write..would probbaly be useful lol. but yeah..again I have yet to do this on these forums... this topic included...
Second is...well...honestly... sigh..its kinda a lot of differant things combined as one...a majority is relate dto my sex addixtion. i coudl go into detail but..while not exactly an addiction to sex its still an addiction a part of sex..sigh sorry moving on yeah.
I find myself..if i try hard...hoping i can bring myself to do what need sto be done...because i cannot...not in any way... afford to NOT get th ehelp i need...nor can i afford to let myself liek always get motivate dand determined..then stall at the start...I need to do this so...if you see me just hangin in these forums th enext two days...and not doing anything about this..please..kick my ass in gear a bit? my..well my life well being nad...in essenc emy ability to find happiness..and forgive myself for certain things....so please... if you can..sigh..
i am making this post for myself as well to read and remind myself th enext few days what i am doing and why i need it so..please don't deelte either?..hopefully..see you guys on th eotherside with everything or at least th eimportant thigns goign well..
I really need to ...this i sno joke..these next two days..could change my life one way or another..
until then sta safe..wish me luck...enjoy what you got...
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Hope everything goes well for you. Don't give up; you'll get through.
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As someone whose spent the last 4 years recovering from a complete nervous breakdown and more, I wish you well. Stay strong and believe in yourself, I was in the same boat, still am to some degree, but I'm fighting back, a little every single day, and it does get better. It's never worth giving up, there's always something worthwhile to fight for, and that something is you.
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So the worse case scenario NEARLY happened..but her parents saved my ass...however I am now packign to go back to san antonio..knowing the best person in my life will now bee far far away and...mayeb never wantign to talk to em aagin..because I was stupid
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I remember what it was like to have my whole world come crashing down around and lose pretty much everything that's important.
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This year has pretty much been a low point in my life too. So yeah, my sympathies go out to you.