lol, you don't need to be so hard on yourself - it's pretty cool for a first model.

Just keep at it and you'll get the hang of how it all works. At this stage I'd recommend you avoid smoothing models, and instead just smooth curved areas with a bit more geometry, since as Oddgrim has said: smoothgroups won't be saved when you go through whatever conversion process you're using.
(What process is that incidentally? Do you export the model as a .x or .3ds or something, and then save it as a .cob using 3d exploration or some other process?)
I do also have a little technique for keeping surfaces flat that you may find useful:
If you have a surface (usually two triangles making up a quadrilateral) that has a bend in it, and you want it to be flush, a trick is to use the mouse middle button (in isometric view) to rotate your view around until you have two of the 4 verts in the same spot. Of the remaining two verts, you just pick one to constraint-drag (along the X, Y or Z axes) into alignment with the other three verts.
(Have a read of this if you're not sure how to use constraints while moving:
http://www.hard-light.net/forums/index.php/topic,42815.msg879403.html#msg879403 )

I used this technique just now on your model, so you can see the effects side by side:

