[mikhael]

A friend of mine is a former Marine from the old days. He sends me crap all the time, usually about the military. This is appropriate for you lot.

Yea though I Fly Through the Valley of Death, I Shall

Fear No Evil For I am at 80,000 Feet and Climbing!

(Sign over the entrance to the old SR-71 operating

base, Kadena, Japan)

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You've never been lost until you've been lost at Mach 3.

  (Paul F Crickmore - test pilot)

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The only time you have too much fuel is when you're

on fire.

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Blue water Navy truism: There are more planes in the

ocean than submarines in the sky.

(From an old carrier sailor)

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If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage, it's

probably a helicopter -- and therefore, unsafe.

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When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane, you

always have enough power left to get you to the scene

of the crash.

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Without ammunition, the USAF would be just another

expensive flying club.

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What is the similarity between air traffic controllers

and pilots?

 If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; If ATC screws up,

the pilot dies.

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Never trade luck for skill.

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The three most common expressions (or famous last

words) in aviation are "Why is it doing that?"

"Where are we?" and "Oh Sh*t!"

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Weather forecasts are horoscopes with numbers.

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Progress in airline flying: now a flight attendant can

get a pilot pregnant.

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Airspeed, altitude and brains: Two are always needed

to successfully complete the flight.

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A smooth landing is mostly luck; two in a row is all luck;

three in a row is prevarication.

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I remember when sex was safe and flying was dangerous.

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Humankind has a perfect record in aviation.

We never left one up there!

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Flashlights are tubular metal containers kept in a

flight bag for the purpose of storing dead batteries.

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Flying the airplane is more important than radioing your

plight to a person on the ground incapable of

understanding or doing anything about it.  

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When a flight is proceeding incredibly well,

something was forgotten.

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Just remember, if you crash because of weather,

your funeral will be held on a sunny day.

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Advice given to RAF pilots during WWII when a prang

(crash) seems inevitable,  endeavor to strike the

softest, cheapest object in the vicinity as slow and

gently as possible.

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The Piper Cub is the safest airplane in the world; it

can just barely kill you.

(Attributed to Max Stanley, Northrop test pilot)

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A pilot who doesn't have any fear probably isn't flying

his plane to its maximum.

(Jon McBride, astronaut)

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If you're faced with a forced landing, fly the thing as

far into the crash as possible.

(Bob Hoover - renowned aerobatic and test pilot)

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If an airplane is still in one piece, don't cheat on it!

Ride the bastard down!

(Ernest K Gann, author & aviator)

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Never fly in the same cockpit with someone braver

than you.

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There is no reason to fly through a thunderstorm in

peacetime.  

(Sign over squadron ops desk at Davis-Monthan AFB,

AZ, 1970)

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"What is the purpose of the propeller? The purpose of

the propeller is to keep the pilot cool. You don't believe

that? If the propeller stops, watch how the pilot starts

to sweat".

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The two best things in life are a good landing and a

 good bowel movement.  The night carrier landing is one

of the few opportunities in life where you get to

experience both at the same time.  

(Author unknown, but surely someone who's been there)

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If something hasn't broken on your helicopter,

it's about to.

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Basic Flying Rules: Try to stay in the middle of the air,

do not go near the edges of it. The edges of the air

can be recognized by the appearance of ground,

buildings, sea, trees and interstellar space it is much

more difficult to fly there.

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You know that your landing gear is up and locked when

it takes full power to taxi to the terminal.

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[aldo_14]

I'm guessing he didn't like choppers much?

[übermetroid]

[Clave]

Nice!

[kasperl]

Great stuff...

Are you back for real, or just posting this while passing through?

[Rictor]

Good songs to play while flying:

Megadeth - High Speed Dirt
...
See the earth below
Soon to make a crater
Blue sky, black death
I’m off to meet my maker
...

[Sandwich]

[pyro-manic]

Great stuff! Flying is the most simultaneously terrifying and exhilerating thing I've ever done.

Mik: were you a flyer then?