So anyway. Today was the last day of school (except for collecting report cards, which is only a half hour). All the 9th graders went to have a sort of pizza party/water fight off somewhere, and it was quite fun. Afterward, a bunch of friends and I went off to another friend's house to go swimming and all that, and one guy and I ended up staying for supper. After that we left, me and my friend (the other guy who stayed) lived quite close together, so we walked home together. I had my dog, and my snorkeling pack with a bunch of stuff in it, and we were walking back.
Now here's where it gets interesting (sort of). My friend and I are walking, and we see these flyers in driveways. Now these things are just cheap ****, and they're delivered by some fat old man. I noticed that they were only on one side of the street, so I said that we should get as many as we could, and pull something on the guy delivering me (I had met him before, and he was an asshole). No one likes the flyers, they're just crap that clogs up ditches, so we picked them up. We had about 7, and were in a new and uninhabited section of the subdivision, almost to my friends house. Well who drives up behind us but the fat guy. He sees us with the flyers and he's there *****ing about how he'll call the cops, and how they'll lock us up forever (he actually said that). So we chuck the stuff in the middle of the road, and keep walking off, not even acknowledging him. He gets out of his car, pulls his phone out, and makes a really dramatic show of punching in three numbers (which should be four, 911 and then Send). He's like "Yeah, I've got two little ****s here think that they're cool, snatching flyers. So come on over and lock them up.".
Now all this time we've been walking, and he's making a real dramatic show of yelling into his phone (which had been closed the whole time) for our benefit. He gives completely wrong descriptions of our clothes and ****, and then yells to run, cause the cops'll be there soon. He gets in his car, picks up the papers, and drives up alongside us, and starts berating us. He's getting steadily more pissed, as we don't rise to the bait he throws at us, as we calmly reply to everything he says, while at the same time using rude terms.
So he's following us (been doing so for about 4 k's, we were starting to think that he was a pedo), stops once or twice, but still keeps up, more or less. We get to my friend's house, and keep going, we figured we were going to play with the ****er. We go up an obscure side street, and the guy stops at the bottom, and asks some random bikers who we are. We go up the street, which is by the school, and then into the woods. My friend and I split up, he went home, I went a more roundabout route, about 4 kilometers, and I got a shower, and here I am.
The funniest thing was how ridiculously retarded he was. This 50 year old fat guy follows us around for 45 minutes, all because of a few flyers. The thing with the phone was pretty retarded, but more so was the fact that he followed us for so long. I was wondering why he was so determined. And when he was talking to the "cops", he was so loud, and when he "dialed", he immediately starts talking, without giving it time to ring, or for the "cops" to respond.
All in all, it was ****ing hilarious.
