ok im kinda shocked. so after i got BSG and played that some. amazed by its amazingness but realizing since it worked that my problems with FS2 didnt make any sense. i checked the forums and you asked if fs2_open worked. and im thinking no way why would it. but then im like well.... BSG has that same fs2_open maybe it would..... so yea it magically works. i assume whatever BSG install did, fixed something.
i went to multiplayer and it seemed to log in and all, no servers listed but hey i cant complain really atm.
il play with it more tomorrow and see if everything is working right. to tired right now.
thanks for the help