Day One: I bought a game called Freespace 2 today! I'm so happy! This game looks so cool, I bet it'll be real fun to play it. But I have to wait until tomorrow to install it because I need to find my CD-ROM. How stupid is that? Compaq gave me a floppy disk drive and a cup holder, but no CD-ROM!!! Why did I buy this computer last week?
Day Two: My roomate showed me my CD-ROM. I guess Compaq didn't give me a cup holder. At least he's in good spirits since he almost laughed for an hour when I asked if I should call Compaq about getting a real cup holder for the computer. At least he installed Freespace 2 for me! But man, what a sucky game! It's just a picture of some sort of huge room with a bunch of doors and people. How is this supposed to be fun?! My friend found something called the "Violation Bullet Bored", I think it was called. I figured out how to become a member and spent the rest of today configuring my options! So far I have a 3 page short story in my signature and all the lyrics to my favorite Pink Floyd songs! Tomorrow I'll add another short story and post my complaints about Freespace 2.
Day Three: I posted to the Vicious Boomerang Baster or whatever it was today. There were a lot of topics, and I didn't want mine to get ignored, so I was sure to type everything in capital letters to get the attention I deserve! I told everyone how much I hated Freespace 2 and how boring it was to just stare at a picture! But everyone was really rude to me! They called me all kinds of names and made fun of me. So I replied calling all of them names, too! Some mean person who must think they're god named Adam Pletcher e-mailed me telling me to cut down my signature and behave! THE NERVE! What makes him think he can order me around?! I posted another message denouncing this tyranical person named Adam Pletcher. Hah! I'll show him!
Day Four: It turns out Adam Pletcher helps run the Virginian Beachball Boredom or whatever that evil place is. He said if I don't stop posting obnoxious messages I'll be banned. Everyone else made fun of me for all three of my posts. I was actually able to play Freespace 2 today because someone explained how to start the campaign. I guess they were right...So I spent the rest of my time looking through the other messages. Why does everyone like pirates and who is this Mr. T?
Day Five: I just had a thought! Why doesn't Freespace 2 use real physics?! I posted a several page essay on why it's an inferior game because it doesn't use real physics. No one replied except some weird guy named WildWolf who just made fun of me. So I replied calling him every bad name I could think of. Adam Pletcher e-mailed me again. I'm really starting to hate the Voyager Bashful Baffoon or whatever that place is...
Day Six: I barely finished Freespace 2 today. I also found some other pages that have stories about Freespace 2! Wow, I'm gonna write a story and it'll be the best ever! I posted to the Velvet Beanie Baby, or whatever the hell that place is called, about my story. I said I would have stuff in it like Earth and a homeworld for the Shivans and giganto death rays and beautiful women and some Shivan allies! Everyone made fun of me again, especially some ******* named Plasma who called me a lunatic. I replied calling him a ******* and other names. I got another e-mail from Adam Pletcher. He agreed that Plasma was a ******* child from the darkest depths of hell, but he still warned me.
Day Seven: My roomate saw everything I was doing on the Venetian Beach Boys or whatever it was. He was laughing really hard. I bet he was laughing at those idiots Plasma and WildWolf. My roomate suggested I complain about Freespace 2 not supporting 800x600 resolution. I don't know what that means, but I wrote up a 2 page post about it anyways, saying Freespace 2 was the worst game ever because it did not have 800x600. Everyone made fun of me again! I HATE that place! I posted a message cussing all of those ninnies out for thinking they're smarter than me!!!
Day Eight: Adam Pletcher kicked me off the Vestigual Bronchi Bingo thing today. Good riddance. I don't need those fools! Besides, I found another place for a game called Wing Commander, and they don't care if I post in caps or have my favorite short stories in my signature! So HA HA to you Freespace 2! I win!!!
Some of the old Plasma stuff.
