[Nuke]

today i ran into a random crazy girl on the way to get coke and chips. she was on some kind of drugs and was a tad bipolar. we had a little chat about ohms law, legos, cats, and when was the last time i got to bone. i know where discussions like this are headed. she told me she loved me right in front of her black boyfriend.

this is the second such encounter with a member of the opposite sex in as many weeks. the other crazy was the sister of the crazy person next door. we discussed serial killers, cats, and how good this ****hole of a town is and how awesome the asshole population was. i wonder if she knew someone got shot in this building 2 years ago. then she started talking a bunch of bible thumper crap and lost my interest. hopefully the one i ran into today yields some sex.

[deathfun]

legos

NUKE
NO
NO BAD
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

[deathspeed]

Gooooooooooood... he thinks I have guns for the sake of guns...

'fun' and 'speed' are pretty much synonymous in my book, but i never get them two mixed up.

I prefer Nuke's "nuke all the things" over deathfun's "guns for the sake of guns" 

theres no need to choose

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nuclear_artillery

Or http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Davy_Crockett_%28nuclear_device%29

Now THAT'S a gun!

[Scourge of Ages]

A story of the digital age:

Bought a Humble Books Bundle.
Read a book. Book was terrible.
Went on Amazon to review book, negatively.
Woke up this morning, Facebook messenger notification from the author.
He thought my review was funny.
Still weird.

EDIT: Oh yeah, the book was written in the 80s.

[Colonol Dekker]

Had a visit from Dekker and his other half yesterday. It was nice seeing that bastard in person for the first time in the better part of a year. 

Teapot kettle.

[niffiwan]

A story of the digital age:

Bought a Humble Books Bundle.
Read a book. Book was terrible.
Went on Amazon to review book, negatively.
Woke up this morning, Facebook messenger notification from the author.
He thought my review was funny.
Still weird.

EDIT: Oh yeah, the book was written in the 80s.

Was the book called "Wingman... something"? If so then I agree with you, it was a truly dreadful book.

[Scourge of Ages]

Was the book called "Wingman... something"? If so then I agree with you, it was a truly dreadful book.

Bingo.

[Klaustrophobia]

was having a good day.  woke up on time.  enjoyed one of my new albums start to finish, then played my bass, then off to the beach for a pretty decent skim session.  had a delicious sub for lunch and relaxed on the couch watching a movie.  and that's where it went to hell.  because apparently anything the least bit romantic or emotional sets me off again.  i thought i was settled in for just dwelling sadness and regret, but i guess i'm not done with crushing despair just yet.
 

[An4ximandros]

IR da mazda hacka This website is too much fun...

[deathfun]

was having a good day.  woke up on time.  enjoyed one of my new albums start to finish, then played my bass, then off to the beach for a pretty decent skim session.  had a delicious sub for lunch and relaxed on the couch watching a movie.  and that's where it went to hell.  because apparently anything the least bit romantic or emotional sets me off again.  i thought i was settled in for just dwelling sadness and regret, but i guess i'm not done with crushing despair just yet.
 

You're lucky
My brain does thinks of the people who were close to me (who no longer are) by associating pretty well everything is existence to a related thought making me unable to enjoy anything completely. An example? Started playing a song on piano, Beethoven's 7th Symphony, Allegro. My brain clicked, I started to get run over by memories because it was in a movie I watched once a while ago and had almost forgot about of which I had also watched with someone. I can't actually touch my piano without my brain associating with someone (which isn't unhelpful, makes playing more emotional and better)

Or most games because sometimes I was in skype while playing them, not necessarily with the person. Or just eating a damned burger!
Basically, normal life had involved these people everyday to the point where they were just as part of me as I was, then they were gone because of me and so I feel what I made myself lose all the time. Yay perpetual misery for eternity yaaaay

That was entirely not helpful, but I envy you only having a limited set of triggers. Making romantic things less romantic is fairly easy.

[Mongoose]

Have you sought out any professional help?  Forcibly shoving acquaintances away from you seems like the very worst way to manage emotional issues.

[deathfun]

It's not like I want to, it just ends up that way because I'm a miserable person. Takes its toll on people after a while, specially when they're trying to help you. What doesn't start as a burden eventually becomes one. This is why I don't talk about too personal of stuff with my shooting friends and limit actual deep talks with other people to once every long while spread out over more than one person.

Least this way it doesn't affect people, which is good. As for professionals, yes, and they're none too helpful (partly because of me not trusting them, partly because they're none too helpful)

Wasn't always like this. Time just slowly carved me into it. I just don't know why, it's not like I've lived a bad life overall. I've theories though which make sense and fit with the timeline

[Mongoose]

There certainly is a basic level of trust that it helps to bring into things, but the other thing to keep in mind is that different doctors/therapists may work better than others for you.  It can take a few tries to find someone who works well with you and is able to help you out, but the results can be really worth it.

[Aardwolf]

My previous shrink sucked. I tried to talk to him about my girl problems and he interpreted it as "I'm mad at them" when it was really "I want to repair those relationships"... maybe I wasn't explicit enough. Maybe he interrupted me. Idr.

[deathfun]

Maybe at a subconscious level you actually are mad at them, but since you're convinced consciously that you're just trying to repair it you can't accept the diagnosis

As for a few tries Mong, I've been to a few over the years and all of them were just eh
Then there's a matter of money I don't have paying for treatment that doesn't work/will take a few hefty payments just to figure out who does

And since I believe there's a high chance for failure, I'm biased towards that despite my being self aware of the fact I'm biased towards that

[Aardwolf]

I don't think so? Either way the guy didn't address what I actually wanted help with.

[Nuke]

i haven't met a therapist i didnt want to vivisect just to make certain everything was where it should be and they were not under any kind of outside control, though i have a feeling id probibly find that they were and have to kill them anyway, lest reveal that i know what i know. im content to move into an old nuclear silo where i can peacefully pursue my... uhmm... hobbies in complete solitude without the interference of other humans (especially vagina people). though i might have a couple dozen cats for security.

[Luis Dias]

So no one linked to Battuta's latest short fiction?

For shame people for shame

http://www.shimmerzine.com/anna-saves-them-all-by-seth-dickinson/

[The E]

Oh, it's out already?

[InsaneBaron]

Two bits of fiction in one day? Neat! Will read Battman's work ASAP.

EDIT: Just read it. Thumbs up.