Author Topic: The immensely irritating adventures of Ryne Stormchaser  (Read 15366 times)

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Offline MP-Ryan

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Re: The immensely irritating adventures of Ryne Stormchaser
If only this Dragonborn gig conferred wings, or the ability to fly ON dragons.

Oddly convenient turn of phrase, or forshadowing??

I admit nothing.
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Offline MP-Ryan

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Re: The immensely irritating adventures of Ryne Stormchaser
I'm going to start disconnecting the stories a little more and focus on the events that most captured my interest for being unusual, rather than highlight quests that completed in a fairly standard fashion.  This should allow me to keep up better, reduce the length, and focus on stories with organic elements and interest rather than stock happenings. which Ryne takes an enjoyable vacation in Markarth...

Markarth.  You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy.  Naturally, I threw caution to the wind.

I've made my way in and out of Markarth a few times now, somehow got myself named Thane, bought a house which I furnished with all manner of expensive items and a Housecarl who I promptly voluntold to join The Blades, thus leaving the place empty and a prime target for thieves.  Hilariously enough, while I attributed the lack of break-ins to my shack in Whiterun which is crammed full of items worth more than Dragonsreach itself to my discretion and the presence of Lydia (and her custom Dragon armour and weapons that I so lovingly crafted and enchanted), my abandoned house in Markath has never been ransacked either.  This leads me to believe that thieves have considerably more respect for my imposing appearance and sour demeanour than, well, pretty much everyone else.

At any rate, way back on my first visit to Markarth I spotted a man pull a dagger and start suspiciously toward a woman at one of the merchant stalls.  Interrupting him, he turned on me and got my sword through his face for the trouble, sputtering something about Forsworn.  Now, I have stumbled into various places in the Reach crawling with more Forsworn than insects; these people are murderously unpleasant and very populous outside the city.  The Markarth guards, meanwhile, ushered everyone away and basically told me to sod off.  Not particularly spoiling for a fight with the entire City Watch, I made to comply when a fellow named Eltrys handed me a note he claimed I'd dropped... which turned out to be a request to meet him in the closed Shrine of Talos.  Intrigued, I headed inside, and was treated to an explanation of a conspiracy by the Forsworn to retake the Reach.  Now, to be fair, in my experience the Forsworn already held most of the Reach except for Markarth itself, but nevertheless stopping that seemed a laudable goal - not that the Nords themselves who were running the place seemed to be nice people.  In point of fact, the Sliver-Bloods who basically ran the city were the main reasons Markarth is a hive of scum and villainy, so far as I was concerned.  At any rate, I agreed to look into the matter as it seemed an excellent distraction from destiny, and an excuse to bash some heads in Markarth... and if there is a 'civilized' place in Skyrim that needed some heads to be bashed, Markarth was it.

My first stop was to check on the intended victim, an Imperial woman who was huddling by the fire in the Silver-Blood Inn.  On my way to talk to her, I bumped into a drunken Nord who offered to engage in some fisticuffs for some gold... an offer I accepted.  As I said, a good place to bash heads, and I started with the drunken patrons in Silver-Blood establishments.  That minor victory enhancing my mood and his coin enhancing my riches, I talked to the victim and eventually prised some information from her - namely that she was actually a spy and not just an innocent merchant.  The plot thickens like a Nord's bashed skull.

My next stop was the warrens to investigate the room of the murderer himself.  After convincing the weak-willed fellow in the Warrens itself to give me the key, and quick rifling through the dead man's belongings revealed a note signed only 'N.'  Interesting.  I left the warrens and ran into a thug who tried to warn me off with his fists.  Thus I thumped the second head of the day, shoved him in the creek, and learned that 'N' was Nepos the Nose, another one of Markarth's upstanding citizens.

I hiked up the interminable steps that cover the city and, after searching the doors, found that Nepos' home was actually immediately adjacent to my own.  Odd.  It's not often you get the chance to combat corruption and get rid of a neighbour at the same time.  Wistfully hoping a buxom barmaid moves in after I move Nepos out, I strolled in and bumped into a hagraven in human form.  At least, she had the disposition of a hagraven.  The maid told me in no uncertain terms that I was not allowed in.  Naturally, I simply walked past her, and she merely wandered down by the door and continued to lecture me.  I walked up to Nepos, who was busy reading a book, and stood there waiting.  A short while later, ignoring my presence entirely, Nepos called down to tell the maid it was alright and to let me in.  I've heard of pretentious lordliness, but honestly, acting as if I had merely waited arguing at the door and then inviting me up while I stand right in front of the man had some serious nerve.

Nepos then proceeded to tell me all about how he was a Forsworn agent who still took orders from the old Forsworn King, Manadnach, from Cidna Mine.  I wondered if this was a deathbed confession or conscience until he informed me that many another had gotten as far as I had and hadn't left... because everyone employed in his house was also Forsworn.  It was thus that I found myself surrounded by five corpses as the domestic staff and their master all attacked me and were cut down in short order.  Dragon skin?  Dragon bones?  Yeah, lost on these idiots too.

My next stop was Thonar Silver-Blood, who I had jotted down in my journal despite being unable to remember why.  When I entered his home, or rather, "The Treasury House" - the pretensions of these people escalates at every turn - I told the girl that he was expecting me, headed up to his room, cast myself invisible, snuck up behind him, and yanked his journal out of his back pocket which I then read, still invisible, in a dark corner.  I was taking no chances with swarms of Forsworn agents this time.  Oh, Thonar has been a very bad man.  Turns out he's been manipulating Manadnach in prison to dispose of people that threatened Thonar's interests in the Reach.  A lot of people.  And now, it seems, the murderous king was starting to turn on his murderous master.

I stayed invisible and left the house, headed back for the Shrine to report all to Eltrys.  When I entered, I began to get an ominous feeling - at the bottom of the steps lay Eltrys' corpse, and in front of me stood three of Markarth's finest who informed me that I couldn't disrupt the state of affairs and was therefore going to prison or going to die.  In reality, I was going to prison or they, along with likely every other guard in the City, were going to die, but I didn't quibble.  This actually suited my plans - they hauled me off to Cidna mine and left me in threadbare clothes with no apparent hope of escape.  Alas, they were apparently unfamiliar with the phrase 'wolf in sheep's clothing.'  My Conjuration talents ensured that I was never defenseless, sword or no.

After being told, ho hum, that I would never escape the mine and needed to get to work - yeah, that was going to happen - I headed out into the mine, which was full of former Forsworn.  One suggested a shiv might be useful, which made me chuckle - primitives - and the burly fellow at the gate was quickly convinced that I should indeed be allowed to see the 'king.'  Manadnach turned out to be an arrogant fellow at a desk who tried to recruit me.... which might have worked if I'd never traveled a road in the Reach, but after being attacked by literally dozens of Forsworn for months and witnessing their attacks on anyone on the roads, my sympathies were running rather short.  Nevertheless, I wandered down the tunnels and spoke to an old man who was apparently supposed to make me sympathetic to the cause.  Turns out, the supremely unjust Nords running Markarth had executed his daughter without cause.  Aside from the lack of verification concerning the 'without cause' portion of the story, I already knew the Nords running Markarth were creeps and had some plans for them myself.

Returning to Manadnach, I went to inform him that I had no intention of joining his cause and to offer him to surrender and hand over his escape route key, or prepare to defend himself.  Alas, he dismissed me out of hand and wouldn't converse, so I had to suffice with an apology while I released the Bound Sword I stuck in his chest.  naturally, this brought the minions running and I had no desire to dispatch more pathetic inmates who were now without their leader, so Pacify spells took care of them.  I opened the gate, carefully locking it behind me, and headed down the tunnel toward what I hoped was freedom.  Alas, freedom was obstructed by various spiders and Dwarven Spheres that proved slightly more difficult in my unarmoured state - I of course forgot about Toldfir's Dragonskin spell until after I finished scrambling about the cave waving my bound sword haphazardly.

When I stepped out of the tunnels into the sunlight, I found myself in the southeast corner of Markarth out of the sight of pretty much everyone, except Thonar who stood there patiently waiting.  It would seem he expected me, as he handed over my gear and thanked me for disposing of the Forsworn problem while he mused about finding a replacement for disposing of inconvenient Markarth citizenry.  He started to wander off down the slope, and I shook my head.  There was no chance I was letting this creep walk away from this.

My Frenzy spell took Thonar in the back of the head, and so far as Markarth was concerned, he died after attacking me in cold blood in a secluded corner of the city and I merely defended myself.  Actually, I later learned that no one saw our little exchange - for as I left Markarth, I was accosted by a courier carrying a note from the Jarl and 100 gold... it seems Thonar even left me an inheritance!

Skulls bashed.  Justice performed.  Irony served.  It's been a good day.
« Last Edit: March 28, 2014, 12:38:29 am by MP-Ryan »
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Offline TrashMan

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Re: The immensely irritating adventures of Ryne Stormchaser
All this Skyrim goodness has prompted me to play it again. With mods.

The Glory of Skyrim.

If you're wondering why there are two characters - the elf girl is my second, non-serious playtrough. She and her brigade of amazons (I can have up to 15 active followers, but I capped it at 3) are running around causing mischief. With dildos, singingbears and chicken bows.
« Last Edit: May 02, 2014, 08:28:45 am by TrashMan »
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Offline An4ximandros

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Re: The immensely irritating adventures of Ryne Stormchaser
I really need to get a new PC so I can go back to Skyriming. The game's shennanigans are just too much fun to ever fully 'leave'.


Offline TrashMan

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Re: The immensely irritating adventures of Ryne Stormchaser
If you're wondering what mods I'm using:

•  00 Skyrim.esm

•  01 Update.esm

•  02 Unofficial Skyrim Patch.esp [Version 2.0.3]

•  03 Dawnguard.esm

•  04 Unofficial Dawnguard Patch.esp [Version 2.0.3]

•  05 HearthFires.esm

•  06 Unofficial Hearthfire Patch.esp [Version 2.0.3]

•  07 Dragonborn.esm

•  08 Unofficial Dragonborn Patch.esp [Version 2.0.3]

•  09 ApachiiHair.esm

•  0A AzarHair.esm

•  0B AOM.esm  <---- Age of Magic

•  0C AP Skyrim.esm

•  0D ClimatesOfTamriel.esm

•  0E Lanterns Of Skyrim - All In One - Main.esm

•  0F RiverHelm.esm

•  10 ClimatesOfTamriel-Dawnguard-Patch.esp
•  11 ClimatesOfTamriel-Dragonborn-Patch.esp
•  12 ClimatesOfTamriel-Dungeons-Hazardous.esp

•  13 AOS.esp                                   <----- Audio Overhaul for Skyrim
•  14 AOS2_DGDB_USKP Patch.esp

•  15 Skyrim Flora Overhaul.esp
•  16 SFO - Expanded Diversity.esp
•  17 Grass_On_Steroids_SFO-SHORT.esp

•  18 AOM.esp

•  19 Immersive Battles.esp
•  1A Immersive Brigands.esp
•  1B Immersive Dawnguard.esp
•  1C Immersive Dragonborn.esp
•  1D Immersive Factions.esp
•  1E Immersive Patrols.esp
•  1F Immersive Travelers.esp

•  20 Skyrim Immersive Creatures.esp [Version v6.5.2]
•  21 Skyrim Immersive Creatures - DLC2.esp [Version v6.5.2]

•  22 Purewaters.esp

•  23 RaceMenu.esp
•  24 RaceMenuPlugin.esp

•  25 SkyUI.esp

•  26 Character Creation Overhaul.esp
•  27 CCO - Diverse Races And Genders.esp
•  28 CCO - Dynamic Skill Progression.esp

•  29 Cloaks.esp

•  2A Hothtrooper44_Armor_Ecksstra.esp
•  2B Hothtrooper44_ArmorCompilation.esp

•  2C Immersive Weapons.esp

•  2D AOS2_CoT3_1_patch.esp

•  2E imp_helm.esp

•  2F PIVariety.esp          <----- pesant clothing

•  30 AK- Buyable Paintings and Pictures.esp

•  31 Complete Crafting Overhaul_Remade.esp
•  32 CCO_SIC_Patch.esp

•  33 Chesko_WearableLantern.esp

•  34 EnchantmentOverhaul.esp

•  35 Run For Your Lives.esp [Version 1.2.4]

•  36 Guard Dialogue Overhaul.esp

•  37 AOS-GDO Patch.esp

•  38 Artifact Disenchanting.esp
•  39 Artifact Disenchanting - Dawnguard.esp
•  3A Artifact Disenchanting - Dragonborn.esp

•  3B concentrated10.esp   <---- better poisons

•  3C TheEyesOfBeauty.esp [Version 9]
•  3D The Eyes Of Beauty - Elves Edition.esp

•  3E SBF All In One + DLC.esp

•  3F Reduced Distance NPC Greetings.esp

•  40 ethereal_elven_overhaul.esp

•  41 Pale Elves.esp

•  42 BW v2.6.esp
•  43 Aela.esp

•  44 Mei.esp
•  45 rk_Followers.esp

•  46 AmazingFollowerTweaks.esp

•  47 Alternate Start - Live Another Life.esp [Version 2.3.6b]

•  48 DudestiaMultiMarriages.esp

•  49 CoT-WeatherPatch.esp
•  4A CoT-WeatherPatch_DB.esp
•  4B CoT-WeatherPatch_NL2.esp
•  4C CoT-WeatherPatch_NL3.esp
•  4D CoT-WeatherPatch_NL1.esp
•  4E CoT-WeatherPatch_NL4.esp

•  4F DYNAVISION Dynamic Depth of Field.esp

•  50 HarvestOverhaul.esp [Version 2.8.2]
•  51 HarvestOverhaulCreatures.esp [Version 2.8.2]

•  52 Melt_Down_Everything.esp

•  53 RLO - Adaptive Interiors Vanilla Weathers Patch.esp
•  54 Realistic Lighting Overhaul - Weathers - Brighter Nights.esp

•  55 Lanterns Of Skyrim - All In One - RLO.esp

•  56 BecomeKingOfRiverHelm.esp

Not mentioned or active:

Whiterun Alternatives
Dawn of Whiterun / Riften / Windhelm, etc (better cities)
TK children
Nobody dies as a virgin - the life ****s us all!

You're a wrongularity from which no right can escape!


Offline TrashMan

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Re: The immensely irritating adventures of Ryne Stormchaser
The Adventures of Slutzilla, amazon Queen of Riverhelm continue:


This is her in her throne room with her sex slaves FAITHFUL FOLLOWERS

And yes, I do have a mod that can make those accessories work.
« Last Edit: May 04, 2014, 03:14:52 pm by TrashMan »
Nobody dies as a virgin - the life ****s us all!

You're a wrongularity from which no right can escape!

Re: The immensely irritating adventures of Ryne Stormchaser
Hey Trash, would not the general Skyrim your own thread be a bit more appropriate for this?


Offline Dragon

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Re: The immensely irritating adventures of Ryne Stormchaser
Time to post another log entry, MP... :)


Offline MP-Ryan

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Re: The immensely irritating adventures of Ryne Stormchaser
Oh, you want MOAR do you?

I haven't played as much lately, but I do have a short tale worthy of posting: which Ryne discovers that dragons bear no resemblance to the broad side of a barn...

When last I wrote about my work with the Companions, I think I had just become a werewolf.  Recently,. I got tired of the fur in my ears and the snarky comments from various guards about my smelling like a wet dog and set about changing myself back, a process I owe much to poor Kodlak for as it was his guidance and eventual death that gave me the knowledge, tools, and witch heads - yes, you read that right - necessary to do it.

I only mention this because it led me to Ysgramor's Tomb on a godsforsaken frozen spec of an island to the northwest of Winterhold that has no redeeming features whatsoever, Word Wall included in that assessment.  After stepping out of the tomb I was greeted by a beautiful sunset, the onset of a blizzard, and the far-off view of yet another damned dragon circling the College of Winterhold.  The bloody Psijics neglected to mention that part of the job of Arch Mage largely consists of glorified pest control, housekeeper, and finder of alembics, nor that the pests in question consisted of my own mages and inconvenient dragons in equal measure.

Not wanting any of my theoretical-underlings to get eaten today - tomorrow might be another matter, but for the moment everyone was behaving - I trudged off over the iceflows and frozen beaches in the direction of the College, remembering only later that it's bloody difficult to get up to it from the sea below.  The horkers made some obnoxious noises in my direction but lumbered away when my path brought me close to them, and the local bear and wolf populations seemed to have reached an understanding that if they made me annoyed they'd become the lining of my next pair of boots, so I reached the base of the college without incident.

Craning my neck, I could still made out the oversized scaly mosquito flying circles around the college and roaring obnoxiously.  By this time it was well after midnight and I was starting to worry that some intrepid mage would get upset at being kept awake and start flinging lightning out a window, so I was a little anxious to dispatch the beast and be on my way.  I clambered around to the east side of the College and up the snowy slopes onto the ledges near the base.  I could still see the dragon circling above me, but it made no move to attack me, attack something else, fly away, or land.  It just kept flying circles around the College.  I began to wonder if it was just lost and asking for directions.

I tried to Shout at it to get it to land or leave, but it ignored me.

I tried Chain Lightning, but hitting a moving dragon several hundred feet above you is not nearly as simple as one might think.

I decorated various wooden protrusions on the side of the College with a couple dozen ebony arrows - before remembering that I could have used a bound bow and not wasted the rather expensive tangible arrows - in my attempts to convince the beast to land and do battle or kindly find another place to annoy people trying to sleep.  Apparently Ange has to figure out advanced archery lessons, because hitting a moving target the size and speed of a dragon is rather outside the scope of my training and skill.

I detonated several fireballs near the edge of the battlements in the hope that that would get it's attention.  Finally, I even tried a flame cloak spell on myself - the first I've tried since J'zago's overenthusiasm - and stood there like some kind of living Breton barbecue, hoping that the sight of a pre-cooked meal might draw the beast down or send it fleeing to the hills with the thought of fighting someone crazy enough to set themselves alight.


I'm beginning to think that I'd really better get on that task from Parthuurnax, find the Elder Scroll, and learn the Dragonrend Shout, because this was getting ridiculous.

As I stood there pondering, watching the beast continue to circle the College - which it had been doing for a good half hour by that point - I noticed that after all that exertion and putting out the flames I was beginning to resemble a large, armed icicle.  I jumped up and down rubbing my arms a few times to warm up.

The dragon roared, shrieked, turned around, a dove toward me.

Apparently, if trying to lure a Legendary Dragon - as it turned out to be - one need only act like a large chicken.

The beast circled me, let out a blast of fire while strafing overhead - as I did my best to fill it full of arrows, a task much easier when the dragon flies directly over you at a distance of less than 10 paces - turned, and landed directly in front of me, blasting me with a barrage of debilitating spells, the brunt of which I was thankfully able to resist or ignore.

Meanwhile, I bellowed out the Shout for Slow Time, strode up to the beast, and stuck my newly-minted Dragonbone sword, thoughtfully named Vanquish, between the massive lizard's eyes.  Or tried to.  As if it wasn't already completely obvious from the measures required to get the beast to attack, Legendary dragons have REALLY thick skulls.  The dragon blinked - slowly, of course - and tried to bite me in half, which I quickly side-stepped.  I then set above trying to cleave the creature's neck.  If you want to visualize this, picture someone trying to hack through a tree 3 paces in diameter with a metal banner-pole.  My dragonbone blade might as well have been unsharpened, rounded iron.  By this time, my Shout had worn off and we were once again doing battle in real time.  I had clearly wounded the creature, as it could no longer fly, but it was still reasonably fast on the ground and it was only by continuous side-stepping that I managed to avoid being a nighttime snack.  Finally, as it turned it's head I saw an opportunity - improvisation being my strong suit - and smacked it with the flat of my blade from its nostrils to the base of its horns and it stopped for a split-second, stunned.  Apparently thick skulls generate sufficient reverberation to give a dragon pause.  I leaped over its nostrils, swung around a horn, and plunged the point of my blade...

...less than 3 inches into the skin at the back of its skull.  This was getting ridiculous.

Jumping off, I pulled out my bow, backing away as fast as I could run and flinging arrows into it's hide, turning it into some kind of repitilian-looking porcupine.  The beast was slowing, and as I fitted a new arrow to my bow, I smugly aimed for it's eye...

...and fell off the damn cliff edge into the sea below.  At least it wasn't a mountain this time.

As I spluttered my way to the shore, I could see the dragon looking for a way down - it at least had the good sense to want to walk instead of leaping into the frigid sea - and providing an excellent target as it stood peering down in one place.  Three arrows later, and with a tremendous splash, the critter was belly-up in the water and I was collecting some scales for my next set of dragonscale boots, this pair being thoroughly waterlogged.  And, as I trudged up the nearby avalanche slope toward Winterhold, a wolf even volunteered to provide the fur and leather lining.
« Last Edit: May 07, 2014, 11:06:23 am by MP-Ryan »
"In the beginning, the Universe was created.  This made a lot of people very angry and has widely been regarded as a bad move."  [Douglas Adams]