finally saw it, what a boring movie. slow as ****, maybe has one single scene in it, no plot whatsoever, only boring dialogue with static shots about the landsca
ok ok sorry
yeah, it was boring in the same way a rollercoaster becomes boring if you're doing it two and half hours of it in a row. same exact set up for each scene, bring a punchline, deflection to another plot point, rinse repeat. most plot points were meaningless or trivially only setting up later useful tools to get the plot further along.
By far the most boring meaningless junk of a star wars movie ever made. I can't hate it, it's like watching fireworks really. A ****ton of references here and there, either in the text, or in the visuals or in the scenes or in the themes, never anything remotely original.
At a certain point, I was just trying to see other references from other "franchises" in it. "Oh look this exesomething planet looks like a Harry Potter thing, it's all magic now, even fleets of ships are magic. Cool cool". "oh look this is just like Indiana Jones... it even has stupid quicksand in it", "Oh look she can cure living things in it, is this a Witcher thing?", "Oh look, he said he's the entire Sith, she said she's the entire Jedi, they're both Leto II now, cool cool, he even uses the Voices". "Oh look a dagger, is this a Borg thing or a Klingon thing?", "Oh look the three best friends doing a best friends forever at the end of a war that never ends, this is just like Starship troopers, but unironically!"
They even copy pasted the "we have to blow up a dish with ground troops using pre-modern tools (horses) so we can blow up the big tech menace" from Jedi.
Nothing makes sense very very fast and very very flashy. Get the **** out, mr Bay, JJ is in town!
Now I just hope Taika's project goes into a completely different direction and may actually bring us some freshness in this.