I can't do anything useful in terms of making mods...so I just supply comic relief.
I took inspiration for this from one of the cartoons on the SCP website...I just don't remember which...
Sensors: "Captain! The Iceni has jumped in off our port side!"
Captain: "Gunnery Control, fire for effect!!!"
Gunnery: "I can't, sir."
Captain: "Why not?!? Have we been sabotaged?"
Gunnery: "No, sir. Windows has suffered a fatal exception."
Captain: "Damn! Maintenence, you didn't install Service Pack 2K, did you?"
Maintenence: "I'm afraid we did, sir."
Captain: "Crap! What am I gonna tell Command, that the janitors screwed up Fire Control? I'll lose my captain's chair for this!"
Communications: "Why not just tell them we were sabotaged? We can smash up the consoles after the battle."
Captain: "That's a great idea! Send the message now!"
Comms: "Command, Fire Control has been sabotaged! We can't open fire! We need 30 seconds to bring the auxilaries on-line!"
Command: "We don't have that kind of time Colossus! All other vessels, fire on the Iceni!"
Comms (to Crew): "Whew! Captain, I think they bought it. We should be safe from court marshal now."
Crew: *Cheers*
Command: "Bought what? And what's that about avoiding a court marshal Colossus?"
Captain: "Oh God..."
I hope you have enjoyed the latest rendition of Tyrian's Theatre! Join me next time for my next production! Miss it and you'll wish wish you were jettisonned out an airlock!
