[S-99]

After rooting, and tethering my straight talk phone (made sure they couldn't tell if i was tethering first), i find myself at a much better square one in life.

I fled alaska in search of a question mark for a better life. Taking a risk was worth it, anything would be better than the figurative hell and prison that makes up alaska. So many people up there that will not help themselves and just leech off you for their own gain, they don't care if you live or die. Just about all of my friends in the last two years up there had seriously betrayed me. It didn't matter how good of friends i was with them for 10 years or 4. It all boiled down to constantly stocking me, them having no ambition or strength, and never respecting my wishes. Only evil people will subject you to your own rules of high standards to control you. But, i never once thought it would come from friends of whom i was on great terms with for years. I did a lot of investing in my friends, and it really paid out'; you scratch my back and i scratch yours. Until the last two years. The economy in alaska is stagnant. Friends treated me like a walking bank account, my computer business went into the ground because of them, all the cars i sold friends ****ed me on, anything item borrowed was seriously abused or disappeared (that last mother****er left my 1986 dodge lancer sports car parked in back of a gas station for 3 weeks when i let him borrow my other car so he could work, i'm talking about some seriously stupid **** these people did to me).

I have zero tolerance for codependency, self loathing, and jealousy. I got used to being crazy for about 3 months of every year, i only had myself to turn to for support. It didn't matter how depressed or not doing well for myself i was, these people would show up at my door step. I even turned to dealing drugs to pay my rent since everything else i did was made to fail by others. At least drugs always meant money to help me make rent (drugs are guaranteed dollar signs). It didn't matter that in my serious depression of never being able to be left alone that i told my friends i was going to kill myself if i stayed in the waste land because i can't achieve my dreams. I got talked to about how they can achieve their dreams, and why does location matter for me (those selfish ****s, i was their dream, but no one was willing to help themselves to aspire to be like me, instead they wanted to keep using me).

As soon as i said i was going to move, i was threatened with violence. The 20 days before i moved were fun though, i bought the last troy ounce of platinum in all of fairbanks, i then later cashed out my bitcoin. The day before i left, i told people, no one will keep in touch with me, i will achieve my dreams, i will be happy and not miserable (i didn't want to be that guy anymore who drank a fifth a night to be normal and sane when home). I was later desperately told that the threat of violence was just a joke, i disproved them on that. Hell, these people wouldn't have cared if i drank myself to death.

When i made it to texas, it was an average boring christmas i wish i was never a part of. And yet still stalked through my phone. I damn well deleted the pictures everyone wanted me to have of them on my phone before i left alaska. Got a new phone, then another new phone, then another new phone. Got crazy with deleting instant messaging accounts and email addresses. I got rid of a long distance relationship i was in with some great girl it was just not going to work out with (ldr's because i couldn't get that kind of support from anybody in alaska).

Took me months to get over stuff, but that long distance relationship made me get rid of everyone that i did love (this wasn't necessary at all for a stipulation of the relationship; whatever). Now i have a career and nothing. But, i shed absolutely everything from alaska that i even brought with me.

You go to alaska to die a horrible death. I only wish death upon the people that used me. Only one person apologized. The guy who i sold my pain pills to (he is legitimately in pain) when i had my appendix removed who also let me get stoned every night free of charge (all i was looking for was a painless night of sleep).

Alaska is pretty ****ed up; only move there if you want daily pain and misery to the point you're shaking and can barely work your job (just move there if you want to off yourself) Texas is nice. I don't got on my yearly bouts of craze or deal with my own insanity anymore..

[Nuke]

i tried to bail on the state once before. twice even. something keeps bringing me back. it has some kind of odd appeal to an antisocial shutin like myself. maybe things are different in the interior where you lived. where the environment actively tries to kill you and booze and dope are as free flowing as the rain in my part of the state. juneau was also kind of a soul sucking cesspit. full of rape and morale degradation that even a casual satan worshiper like myself finds abhorrent. every woman i met there was some kind of damage case and too many last busses full of drunk and stoned children for my tastes. i somehow managed to stay out of the underbelly of it all and maintain a degree of sanity.

every locale is going to have its underbelly, and the best you can do is stay out of it. i went to phoenix to try to get away from it and i found much the same there, in greater magnitude. everything felt like a scam, i couldn't fix a problem with my bank account without them trying to sell me another service i dont need. went to several job interviews where they wanted me to pay them for "training" before they even looked at my resume. my old chain of bars had deteriorated into strip clubs and meth dens while i was gone. the only people there who remembered me were my old pawn shop boss, and a bartender at an old irish pub i used to go to (and the only one that remained classy).

so i came back to alaska. to petersburg, a ****ty little town on a ****ty little island in a ****ty part of a ****ty state. with a tiny population that mostly stays out of my buisness. it too has its underbelly, which i have mostly managed to stay out of. instead of the slew of tourists you would normally get in an alaskan town, you get migrant workers who come to work the fish processing plants. they mostly stay in the company housing and out of everyone's way though. the town seems to be run by a tight inner circle of entitled pricks (like every other town in the usa). but people remain friendly and you seldom have to lock your doors or shoot anyone.

its probibly best to take pig killer's advice:
"wherever you go, there you are"

[perihelion]

Buckaroo Banzai said it first.

[Nuke]

its an old saying, i doubt pig killer is the first to use it. i guess enduring harsh punishment for the most bull**** (or pig****) of offenses and still keeping an air of optimism about them makes pig killer the perfect person to utter the phrase.

[S-99]

That's the one thing about life that i hated about interior alaska. Stay away from stuff. I lived in delta junction for the last two years until december 8th 2013. Small population; staying away from people you wanted to stay away from is impossible in small towns. You'll always see those ****wads where you work, wherever you go, except for home. There was going home and going to work, and tolerating friends of almost all who had degenerated into desperate codependent users of people. I didn't consider this to be quality of life. Let alone how many people got shoved onto my figurative door step over those 2 years.

The climate is harsh around interior. Yet, people were still doing dumb**** stuff like stealing from their land lord and getting kicked out when it's -30f outside and lower. I don't blame the land lords, i blame the stupid ****wads who don't think that you can't be homeless in alaska. Drug usage is very high around interior. It's how people get through their days up there. Alcohol consumption was an interesting thing i did research on. North korea is a boring waste land, and so is interior alaska. Alcohol consumption is both high with the two locations, because it's boring,  there's nothing to do, and there's all this **** drowning in your ears all the time.

I understand that people get more hostile depending on how hostile the climate is. But, what alaska had in its past with hostile people with at least half a brain, has been replaced with dumb****s that are figurative retards that don't even know why they are hostile. All they do is react, always negatively, its amazing that they survive. I was surprised at the people in fairbanks who had lost their jobs when they themselves were not great people. They all had the same mistake, making sure that everything rides on  having that job; living pay check to pay check. Upon examination of interior alaska is the fact that there aren't many jobs. If there are, then they certainly aren't the ones that you want. That's how i got stuck with being a government employee burger flipper for a year and half. I either had that job or nothing;  i only got that job because the other applicants only spoke spanish. God forbit my resume shows that i have a brain and can damn well flip burgers, follow orders, and perform a job well done. But no, only because i spoke english; **** this overqualified crap, if you hire a dumbass you will have more stress than hiring someone who's smart and can work with you.

I'm sorry you moved back to alaska. I tried my hardest to get jobs down here, and i've had 5 so far. It wasn't that i got fired, i kept playing the job market until i found a high class one; it took months. My last two were enterprise, and now lexus. Enterprise will hire anyone as long as no dui's and **** like that, you can smoke weed in the back and they don't care. After computers, i decided to adapt to survive, so i changed my profession from IT to cars and customer service. Cars and customer service is paying quite well for me. Not dogging enterprise whatsoever, but when you have a license, and you're looking for a job, kick back and do some driving for money. I loved working for enterprise, i only left them because i wanted more hours. The higher ups are so understanding and accomodating; i had no problem working my hardest for them. It was wierd that i was the eldest there. They appreciated good hard work from a worker who was wanting that specific enterprise branch to grow. In alaska if you work your hardest, you get congratulated with an insult, jealousy, and compared to some fake unrealistic past employee who did the same 50% faster (if you were working your hardest, the boss and manager are full of ****). God forbid all of the people who figured out while i was running the last 6 months of my computer business that they could get away with not paying me if everyone kept it to house calls. And then being told i should be greatful i got to work on their **** for free. So many idiots came up to me after they learned the biggest word of their life "altruistic"; said that i should do everything altruisticly. If i did that i would die, doing everything for free keeps food off the dinner table; there was no one sponsoring me to do all of this IT work, and i wasn't rich (nothing told me that people didnt care if i died like that did, just as long as they got materialisticly what they wanted is all that mattered).

More on stupid people...
I also found it hard to have normal conversations up there. Just about everyone i met lacked abstract thought. Not a place for someone who speaks rather abstractly all the time. It was always failure by trying to explain anything to anyone to help them understand something figuratively through their own understanding by getting them to use their own brain; you're fearing for your life in X scenario, and you have item Y to take care of it, item Y is difficult to use (X scenario being the hard situation that the individual was talking about that they were in, and item Y being something  to think something negative or positive to take care of the situation once and for all, either with or without consequences). I'd still get asked, why would i be in that situation?, because you're dealing with it currently in real life dumbass, we're still on the same subject of the situation in life giving you trouble. Why would i do this? What exactly is the item i have a chance to use? No wonder all of the schmucks failed the simplest of abstract thought, algebra (X + 3 = 6...no one can figure out X "X is a letter not a number, why does this matter to me?").

That, and a million dumbasses asking me why i lock my car and my doors, even trying to convince me why locks were even invented in the first place since they can all be broken (it takes time get through any lock, that's their value). That way they can try to divulge a list of belongings for when i was supposedly assured from this person who knows when i leave and come home that leaving all of my stuff unlocked is an alright thing to do. Jesus christ, these people are stupid!!!!!!!! Spoon feed all people in alaska, and give them all of your ****, because that's all their good for. Truly sorry you didn't try out texas man. I wasn't going to be one of those poor souls with the badge of shame that said "i couldn't make anything of myself outside of my normal stomping grounds" who returned to alaska because i couldn't make it else where.

[Grizzly]

I find this thread intriguing, in a sort of morbid fascination way... How did those people in 'Laska become so... simple?

[deathfun]

Their direct and only neighbors are Canadians, while every once in a while they bridge to the Russians
They couldn't stand the niceness so they had to become to opposite, and nobody likes being near Russia

[Nuke]

i dont think its that simple. alaska has somehow managed to keep its mystery about it. people want to come up here and see what its about. they see all those (totally fake) reality shows about alaska and decide they can do that. but they come up here in the summer and think its all great, then they have to winter up here. if you dont have a job, your choices are die, or leech. you are usually too poor to bail on the state. we call them sourdough alaskans. its a situation that creates all kinds of horrible people.

its not even a strictly alaskan problem, its just what happens when you take 'murican values and stick them in a desolate, hostile environment. the same rules apply, but the weather sucks more. i even saw some of it in phoenix too. especially with the us government burning all the social safety nets as of late. id like to know what happens with the unemployed homeless in the more deadly parts of canada or scandinavia.

[S-99]

The influx of reactionary retards that are unable to swallow their pride indeed is a good chunk of the problem. I met a lot of stupid people from florida who moved to bumb **** waste land interior alaska. I never asked them why they moved. Some of it is people moving with their family because they're a military brat. Some of it is a friend in another state had a friend in interior. Some people moved independently (a lot of these were the ones from florida, and washington).

Another good chunk of the problem is a great lack of  parenting with my and younger generations having kids all over america. Alaska is that special amplified state for this with it being the highest in the nation for divorce, drug use, suicide, std's, etc (for two reasons, small population, and a harsh climate). A lot of my friends were from broken families. Other people came from worse situations when growing up. It is too way too much to ask for the average american family something they should be at least doing, teaching critical thinking (stupid people up there lack that too, stupid people burn so many bridges, only needing to come back to them later; if i burn a bridge, i damn well make sure i didn't need to ever interact or get anything from that person ever again). I kept getting bit in the ass because no one cares about consequences of their actions. A lot of consequences of others actions directly affected me; indirect or direct, it didn't matter (i was greatly pissed a lot of the time up there).

On leechy people....they suck HARD! (reminds me of my ex, after helping her out with hundreds of dollars, getting her extra room mates, trying to have a happy time, rearing her puppy, and trying to have a happy time, trying to have a happy time????. She said she'd only go down on me if i married her....****, everything i did for her is completely without whatever i wanted, her cost was too high to s my d)
People got tired of me looking at all objects and people in terms of cost of money. I greatly pissed off those people a lot of the time. Highly reminiscent of fat girls telling athletic girls that they need to work out less and eat more; similar mindset, people were telling me that i need to stop talking about people in terms of costing me, that i should just let **** happen, and always help those in need (a lot of peoples way of telling me, you're only role in life is to be taken advantage of, just let it happen every time, and only support us at your expense). The great thing about only looking at people in terms of money were the people that had used me getting extremely sad or angry, they'd do everything but get off of their ass and take care of themselves. I even get told that i only talk because i like the sound of my own voice (that was the new one before i left). I made these people feel like pieces of **** whenever they were around me the last months before i left as subhuman, they should just go off themselves, they will never become anything, they're all mistakes, that i am awesome being 100% opposite of them, and that it wasn't even worth attempting to be like me.

From saying such things, all i got was people balling their eyes out with others getting very angry (this happened so many times that i relished). That's when just liking the sound of my own voice became the new come back, and that i need to always only hang out with them all the time, that i don't even get to live at the place i rent from, there's something wrong with me if i want to be left alone, and was heavily implied that no one ever liked me doing whatever the **** i wanted to do. Yeah, i hung out with all poor shlups as much as i could before i left for a few months just to terrorize them, and it was great.

One thing that really pissed me off, was that last month i deemed it safe to talk to two of my friends who hadn't screwed me over whatsoever. People used them against me whenever they could. I waited 8 months just to make sure my 2 awesome friends even lost interest in still talking to these people, and when the ****wads would stop caling them (8 months was an over calculation, but good enough).  I knew that they still talked to these horrible ****s of mistake. I found out a month ago that they stopped getting called by these ****wads after a few months of calling my 2 good friends to try to get a hold of me, try to get a rise out of me so i would get back in touch. I pretty darn well meant i don't want anybody to keep in touch with me. (the hidden details were the exception of two people which cost a lot of time.

[haloboy100]

The degenerate people you're talking about sound exactly the same as the the trash of downtown Calgary; it's not surprising that the Alaskan environment perpetuates that.

[Mika]

I applaud you for your decision to get out of dodge, not a lot of people would be able to do that.

What it comes to the mindset, I recognize similar patterns from Scandinavia (jealousy in this case), but it's nothing to that extent. Here I sort of understand part of it, living in a harsh environment with limited number of people, you'll have to be a bit more socialistic.

The drug and alcohol usage is in my opinion partially caused by long sunless days in the northern regions - something I've came to realize nowadays.

But nevertheless, never be afraid to start a fresh. It's something what I had to do once as well, and luckily I decided to go for it and haven't regretted of not being with touch with the people in the village I was born in.

[S-99]

Not a lot of people are able to get out of dodge indeed. People are alright (some how) filthing away. And the people who do want to get out also get used to filthing away. Just some serious lack of planning and self discipline that these kinds of people have for the most part.

Even though that i have nothing now. I have a great job, a place to live, and otherwise nothing else. I have found that in having next to nothing, there is peace and solice in this. Others have drama and problems, and i don't have any of it.

I have started fresh so many times. I am tired of it. I made several life decisions. It's wierd truly starting from fresh for once.