Well, on first glance there's a couple of things that could be improved. First off, and I apologize if this is meant to be a more introductory mission, but there really isn't much to involve the player. The Heian gets destroyed no matter what, and beyond scanning the cargo containers and blowing up a few shivan fighters, the player has no impact in the mission.
Second, no music whatsoever during the mission, seems a little bland, no? Third, there's a line where command asks the Heian team to repeat its last, and I mean just that, last.
Finally, there's no background, nothing but empty void surrounding the area.
Other than that this mission isn't too bad, nice work on the setup of the shipyard and the launching of the player from the destroyer. Message timing might need to be reworked, as there are so many messages they tend to get jumbled about midway through the mission. Also, command sends the message that they've detected Shivans on scope before they actually arrive, that needs fix.
Just some minor bugs, nothing you can't handle from what I've seen. Keep at it, looking forward to the actual campaign.
