Got this in an email:
[q]a. A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.
b. Dijon vu - the same mustard as before
c. Practice safe eating - always use condiments.
d. Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.
e. Those who jump off a bridge in Paris must be in Seine
f. A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy.
g. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
h. Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
i. Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion.
j. Reading while sunbathing makes you well red.
k. When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.
l. A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two tired.
m. Definition of a will: A dead give away.
n. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
o. She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg but broke it off.
p. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
q. If you don't pay your exorcist, you'll get repossessed.
r. With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.
s. When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.
t. You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
u. Local Area Network in Australia: the LAN down under.
v. Every calendar's days are numbered.
w. A lot of money is tainted - It taint yours and it taint mine.
x. A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.
y. A midget fortune-teller who escapes from prison is a small medium at large.
z. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.
aa. Once you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.
ab. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.
ac. Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.
ad. Acupuncture is a jab well done.[/q]
...can you say, "*GROAN*"?
