[Prophet]

Today I joined the honorable group of dumbasses who ****ed themselves up with an axe. I was chopping some firewood, and did manage to chop my left hand. Index finger, just below the knuckle. Good enough for one stitch, not too deep. Didn't expect how easily shock can get you. Head got so blurred I walked in to a wall while getting some paper towels for the bleeding! I did recover pretty fast and drove myself to the hospital.

It wasn't first time I got stitches on me. They took some teeth off me in the army and I had stitches in my mouth. But this was the first time I saw how the hawt looking nurse (I'm not kidding, two of them, real cuties) was patching me up. I somehow felt so stupid. A friggin needle and some thread! I have patched up my pants more than once, and it was little disturbing how little difference there is when it comes to skin.

I also thought an axe would hurt. But only time I felt pain was when they pumped some numb juice in my with this frigging huge syringe. And of  course it hurts a bit now. Can't much move that finger. Or the other fingers for that matter. A bit hard to type...


I was thinking. At least half of my friends have mutilated themselves. Usually with an axe or a knife, and a few more creative cases. How about you guys? How many of you have had stitches on you because of some dumbass stunt you pulled?

[Polpolion]

I've been using axes since like 6th grade, and I haven't cut myself once.

But I did slit my thumb open while whittling down a stick.

[jr2]

Well, I was taking out the trash once, and the cupboard door above me was open.  My first try at lifting the garbage bag was unsuccessful.  The second time I heaved it pretty hard, and my head promptly got slashed by the sharp corner of the cupboard door.  I was a little ticked, so I slapped the door shut, then held my hand over my head.  Afteer a few seconds, it felt better.  There were some neighbors there helping out, and they asked if I was OK.  I smiled and told them I was fine.  As I did so, I took my hand off of my head, and then wondered why they looked so freaked out, not realizing I had blood oozing from the side of my head.

The other time, I was carrying a neighbors' caserole dish back to them, and I tripped and fell on a set of six cement steps, shattering the dish.  I put a few gashes in my hand, plus one in my side.  Didn't hurt that bad, but I felt bad about breaking the neighbors' dish, so I cried.  (I was pretty young then.)

Other than those two cases, I've only had stitches for a biopsy on my swollen lymph nodes.  (Turned out to be some weird disease I got from a sick cat, I guess only like ~70 known cases... it got better on its own.)

[achtung]

Never had stitches.

Broke my arm trying to ride on the front fender of a motorcycle.  (don't ask)

Took off the side of my thumb with an axe, put the flap back up against it and held it there with one of those butterfly bandages.

Had a nail go clean through my foot.

Tried pouring kerosene on an open flame from a 2 gallon can.  You can guess what happened next.

Oh, and I got some really nice road rash down my left side once, that was nice.

[Herra Tohtori]

I received three stitches to my right hand's little finger perhaps ten years ago or so... on the palm side, right where it joins the hand.

A person (few years younger) hit me with a hammer's nail removing side (for reasons long since forgotten) and obviously I stretches me hand to halt the stroke, so i gets me little finger embedded between those two thingsies that are used to pull nails from wood. There's still a scar visible but luckily it didn't hit any nerves or tendons. But anyway, it was pretty much the whole palmside of the little finger nicely sliced open. Bled surprizingly little, though.


At any rate, I've cut myself to computer cases, screwdrivers, bicycle parts, paper knives, paper and obviously a few times with a puukko. Never with an axe though (yet).

So I dunno if I should congratulate you or something else...

[G0atmaster]

once, I was cutting a pickle which kept rolling out from under the veggie cleaver.  So, me being so smart, put it lengthwise between my finger and thumb and held it down while I brought down the cleaver... which cut through the pickle, and also my right index finger just above the knuckle, only about a quarter of a centimeter, but it left me with a nasty scar, and hurt like heck.

The worst injury I've had in terms of number of stitches, however, occurred when I was five years old.  I was climbing on top of the monkey bars on the kindergarten playground, and decided it'd be a good idea to drop between two bars.  A friend of mine and I made a game of seeing who could hold on better after dropping.  Well, one time, I hit the top part of the bone that shapes the eye socket.  I was a little dazed, and it hurt like heck, but no blood, so I decided to drop again.  After two more drops, I hit the same spot again, and split open the skin JUST above my eyelid, and needed 5 stitches, and an eye that got incredibly irritated by the amount of blood that poured out of this wound (small split, but headwounds are BAD.

[IceFire]

I didn't need stiches but the inside of my mouth hurt for a good 6 weeks.

Was in a pretty tight game of soccer...home game...we were down two goals (which is a pretty big deal) and I end up being the only defender left on our team not out of position and this huge 6'4 guy comes charging down the field. So I got this crazy idea to basically just charge him. I'm a little more weighty now but at the time I was only about 125-130lbs so I run straight into this guy (he's huge and probably 200lbs of muscle)...bounce...fly right off of him and off he goes to score a goal.  Bit down so hard...not on my teeth but on my gums.  Lots of blood after that and I was out of the game...no stiches! Apparently I'm wolverine but it took a good long while to completely heal.

No axe mutilations...sounds like you came away pretty well there.

[Dark RevenantX]

This is definitely one of the most uncomfortable threads I've ever read.

[Prophet]

Yeah I've had other accident's too. My mom tells a tale of my running my mouth on a sharp corner of a steel chest. Apparently there was a lot of blood afterwards. But never stitches before.

I'm definitely going to go for something bigger next time. I could use a nice big scar. Might stick with the axe though. It has a certain coolness in it. And apparently it doesn't hurt if you do it right. You should try it! You might meet some nice nurses too.

[Nuke]

i once cut my thumb clean down to the bone, whilest trying to open a can of ham. but that was a long mother****ing time ago. back when i was still playing elite on what i think was a 286.

[TrashMan]

I visited the local hospitals quite a lot....

When I was....9 or so(?) soke kid threw a HUGE friggin rock right on my head. Luckliy, I got a thick skull, so I only ened up with 1 stich.. but the needle broke inside my head, so the doc had to pry it out with another one...

I also cut my hand (below the elbow, but on the inner side) very depp, almost to the bone when I was chasing my sister trough the house (stole something from me). She ran into the parlour and kept the door closed. I tried to open it and my hand went right trough the glass...didn't even notice the pool of blood on the floor..no pain eihter...that is - untill I actually saw the would a bit later

Oh, and I fell down the wet stairs smashing my elbow...I was surprised when it didn't hurt... even later it hurt far less that I wuld have expected. Anyway, I got an operation with a steel bar logged into my arm.. Now I have a nice, big scar over my elbow to remember that event by...

[Mefustae]

Luckliy, I got a thick skull

You don't say.

Hmm, nasty cuts... well, once a loooong time ago when I was about 6 or 7, my bro and I were playing frisbee with a garbage bin lid. Y'know, one of those big plastic deals, with rather sharp edges as it would turn out. Anyway, my complete lack of any hand-eye coordination led to me missing a catch and it hitting me right in the head, giving me a nasty cut along my eyelid. No stitches, just a really goofy looking patch for a few days.

[Bobboau]

anyone remember the slingshot eppisode?

[Mefustae]

When you got a length of wire stuck in your head?

[Kilocmdr Lin]

I riped the top of my left hand open with those metal spike pads they use to create trusses.  Required 52 stitches to fix my hand, i still have 2 in my hand.


One of the people i use to work with on base pierced his ear using the pitot tube on a F-16C block 60. 

[Bobboau]

When you got a length of wire stuck in your head?

yeah that one.

[IceFire]

See were not the fragile humans that aliens are always making us out to be

A fair number of us are still relatively normal despite repeated trauma to the head and other gashes, cuts, and so forth

[redsniper]

A fair number of us are still relatively normal...

[Prophet]

See were not the fragile humans that aliens are always making us out to be

I realized that after the dart in my skull incident I've told a couple of times here. Really puts things in perspective when you get your head pierced.

[Herra Tohtori]

Tell it again. I want to hear it.

Preferably with images included.