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Author Topic: Poor Setekh  (Read 13171 times)

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Offline Corsair

  • Gull Wings Rule
  • 29
Poor Setekh
Reply #80 on: February 28, 2002, 10:40:31 am
Onboard Corsair's Herc Mk. IIIIVXXXX
Janson: Yub...yub...YUB!!!
Corair: Wha-Oh thank you Janson. What's the situation?
Janson: Well, first God said let there be light and then-
Corsair: I mean the current battle situation!
Janson: Well, NeoHunter hired Kettch the Ewok as a Lieutenant and then-
Corsair: I mean the AWACs, Janson! What is going on and why is there a giant face on the front of it?
Janson: Well, first they tried to kill us with a terranturret#weak but then the Loose Cannon came and saved us, except it mutated the AWACs and now it is going on a rampage.
Corsair: Well this is what we'll do...*whispers*...and find me an Ewok for a copilot! I can't let NeoHunter have one and me not have one!
Janson: Yes sir. In fact I know a very nice one by the name of Wikket...
Corsair: Good! Get him on this ship as soon as possible, Janson! And never ever wake me up again by saying yub yub!

*Corsair's Herc Mk. IIIIVXXXX powers up its Bosch Beer reactor and flies away from the mutated AWACs...back towards the Sillier*
« Last Edit: February 28, 2002, 10:45:09 am by 524 »
Wash: This landing's gonna get pretty interesting.
Mal: Define "interesting".
Wash: *shrug* "Oh God, oh God, we're all gonna die"?
Mal: This is the captain. We have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight turbulence and then... explode.
 

Offline Dranon

  • 158th On Station
  • 26
Poor Setekh
Reply #81 on: February 28, 2002, 10:53:06 am
Onboard the newly repaired GTDx Aquitaine....

Ensign: Sir all systems fully repaired, and all ship peices put where they belong.

Adm Dranon: Good...  What is going on over there?

Ensign:  Not sure Sir.  There was a big explosion, and our sensors are having a hard time figuring it out...

Adm Dranon:  Wait... What the hell is that????

Ensign:  The Setekh has changed... It now has a giant face on it!

Adm Dranon: Let's get out of here, we will return when they have destroyed each other...


The GTDx Aquitaine jumps out, running scared...
Steak for Mayor!!
 

Offline Corsair

  • Gull Wings Rule
  • 29
Poor Setekh
Reply #82 on: February 28, 2002, 11:19:29 am
Onboard Corsair's Herc Mk. IIIIVXXXX
Corsair: Need...Bosch...Beer
*Robotic arm extends and gives Corsair a Bosch Beer*
Corsair: [drunk]Ahhhhhhhhh! That feelsh better! Now lesh go attack that little ship wiv da bloo spinny parts an da wierd sheetroo fash thingie...[/drunk]
Janson: Ah sir? You're too drunk to attack anybody...let's disengage for a moment and pick up that Ewok you told me about...
Corsair: Okay then, letsh go get that Ewok...

*Corsair's Herc Mk. IIIIVXXXX jumps out to get Wikket the Ewok copilot*
Wash: This landing's gonna get pretty interesting.
Mal: Define "interesting".
Wash: *shrug* "Oh God, oh God, we're all gonna die"?
Mal: This is the captain. We have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight turbulence and then... explode.
 

Offline Corsair

  • Gull Wings Rule
  • 29
Poor Setekh
Reply #83 on: February 28, 2002, 06:10:27 pm
Onboard Corsair's Herc. Mk IIIIVXXXX
Corsair: So, Wikket, to take the strain of off the Bosch Beer Reactor, I think we should shut down Janson. What do you think?
Wikket the Ewok: [whisper]Yub...yub...yub yub...Hal 9000...yub yub...homicide...yub yub.[/whisper]
Cosair: Oh, yeah, good point Wikket. Well in that case, plot us an attack course for the LNCa Sillier. Let's see if we can get them really really drunk. Mwuahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
Janson: Commence Bosch Beer Reactor Core insertion...
Wash: This landing's gonna get pretty interesting.
Mal: Define "interesting".
Wash: *shrug* "Oh God, oh God, we're all gonna die"?
Mal: This is the captain. We have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight turbulence and then... explode.
 

Offline LtNarol

  • Biased Banshee
  • 211
    • http://www.3dap.com/hlp/hosted/the158th
Poor Setekh
Reply #84 on: February 28, 2002, 06:22:38 pm
On board the LNCa Sillier

SillyBeams spread silliness in a wash of gold light to the crew of the Apocalypse

Ed: Sir, that annoying herc has returned, its powering up weapons...sensors are detecting a massive power surge.  He's gonna beer us.

Lt. Narol: We cant hold anymore beer...activate the secret weapon: the ShipSwatter.  I want that herc smacked all the way back to Sol.

Ed: Yessir, extending the ShipSwatter now, aimming, aiming, swat!

Hercules IIIIVXXXX is flung from the battle

Lt. Narol: Good work Ed, now, keep sillifying the Apocalyse.
 

Offline Corsair

  • Gull Wings Rule
  • 29
Poor Setekh
Reply #85 on: February 28, 2002, 06:47:54 pm
Onboard Corsair's Herc. Mk IIIIVXXXX
Wikket: Yubyubyubyubyub GIANT FLY SWATTER yubyubyubyub!!!
Corsair: What? Where did that giant fly swatter-

*Knocked unconcious as the ShipSwatter, a giant fly swatter knocks Corsair's Herc. Mk IIIIVXXXX far from the battle*

Moments later...
Wikket: Yub yub wake up yub yub Bosch Beer yub yub

*Gives Corsair Bosch Beer*

Cosair: Ahhhh I feel much better now, thanks to Bosch Beer, the greatest medicine in the galaxy! Now do we still have our Bosch Beer Reactor at full power?
Wikket: Yub yub commander
Corsair: Good! Let's teach Narol a lesson. Prepare ship for Ludicrous Speed!
Janson: Sir, we can't go straight to Ludicrous Speed! It's never been tested before!
Corsair: Too bad, a**hole! Ludicrous Speed, go!

*Herc Mk. IIIIVXXXX goes to plaid, headed for the LNCa Sillier*

Corsair: Stop! We're going too fast!
Janson: We can't stop! We've got to slow down first!
Corsair: Bull****! *pulls emergency brake*

*Movie of a funny-looking guy in a big black helmet who goes flying accross the screen and crashes into a wall plays*

Corsair: Good, we've stopped! Now we have to jam the Sillier so they won't see us...

*Fires jar of strawberry jam at the Sillier*

Wikket: Yub yub Suck it Narol! yub yub
Wash: This landing's gonna get pretty interesting.
Mal: Define "interesting".
Wash: *shrug* "Oh God, oh God, we're all gonna die"?
Mal: This is the captain. We have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight turbulence and then... explode.
 

Offline Darkage

  • CRAZY RENDER RABBIT
  • 211
Poor Setekh
Reply #86 on: February 28, 2002, 06:49:16 pm
Quote
Originally posted by wEvil
i dont want to get stoned!
im drunk already!!!!

ARRGH!!

:jaw:


And i am stoned !
This is some weird **** dude !
[email protected]
Returned from the dead.
 

Offline LtNarol

  • Biased Banshee
  • 211
    • http://www.3dap.com/hlp/hosted/the158th
Poor Setekh
Reply #87 on: February 28, 2002, 06:55:52 pm
On board the LNCa Sillier

Ed: Sir! We're being attacked, our viewports and sensors are covered with a icky red jell.

Lt. Narol: Hmm...looks like a gel...activate the windshield whipers.

Ed: Yessir, we also have a report from gunnery control; they say they need more SpaceCrack in order to power the SillyBeams.

Lt. Narol: Well send them some, and find out what ship dared coat my Sillier with red goo.
 

Offline Corsair

  • Gull Wings Rule
  • 29
Poor Setekh
Reply #88 on: February 28, 2002, 07:04:05 pm
Onboard Corsair's Herc. Mk IIIIVXXXX
Janson: We've intercepted a transmission from the Sillier, sir! From Narol to some guy named Ed...

[static]Lt. Narol: We cant hold anymore beer...activate the secret weapon: the ShipSwatter. I want that herc smacked all the way back to Sol.[/static]

Corsair: No more beer, eh? Alright then. Wikket!
Wikket: Yub yub commander!
Corsair: Load 600 bottles of Bosch Beer into the missle bays! If they can't take any more beer then let's beer them to death. Hehehe...
Janson: Sir, that will almost completely diminish our supply of Bosch Beer!
Corsair: Well, let's worry about that when the problem arises. Fire when ready Wikket!

*600 bottles of Bosch Beer soar away towards the Sillier's hull, then break, completely soaking it in beer*
Wash: This landing's gonna get pretty interesting.
Mal: Define "interesting".
Wash: *shrug* "Oh God, oh God, we're all gonna die"?
Mal: This is the captain. We have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight turbulence and then... explode.
 

Offline LtNarol

  • Biased Banshee
  • 211
    • http://www.3dap.com/hlp/hosted/the158th
Poor Setekh
Reply #89 on: February 28, 2002, 07:12:21 pm
On board the LNCa Sillier

Ed: Sir! Its the Herc, its back, and its soaking our hull with Bosch beer.

Lt. Narol: Damn, i thought we'd seen the last of him...ok, bring all weapons to bear...*starts seeing funny colors*  Wow...perty...

Ed: O no, not aga... *starts seeing funny colors* heehee, perty...

Monkey on tactical console: *covers eyes, starts seeing funny colors*
 

Offline Corsair

  • Gull Wings Rule
  • 29
Poor Setekh
Reply #90 on: February 28, 2002, 07:18:00 pm
Onboard Corsair's Herc. Mk IIIIVXXXX

Cosair: Haven't we seen this before where they all start seeing funny colors?
Janson: Yes sir. It's de ja vou all over again...
Wikket: Yub yub commander!
Corsair: Wikket, is that all you can say?
Wikket: Yub yub commander!
Corsair: Dammit I knew this Ewok was a mistake. Oh well, we'll keep him for the time being and use his head as a peace offering if we ever need it. Ummm, since nothing is going on for now how about we all take a coffee break?
Wash: This landing's gonna get pretty interesting.
Mal: Define "interesting".
Wash: *shrug* "Oh God, oh God, we're all gonna die"?
Mal: This is the captain. We have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight turbulence and then... explode.
 

Offline JC Denton

  • Node For Me
  • 27
Poor Setekh
Reply #91 on: February 28, 2002, 08:24:52 pm
To quote a famous Vasudan:

CO-FEE.  INFERIOR.

:D
"I condemn false prophets, I condemn the effort to take away the power of rational decision, to drain people of their free will -- and a hell of a lot of money in the bargain. Religions vary in their degree of idiocy, but I reject them all. For most people, religion is nothing more than a substitute for a malfunctioning brain."  - Gene Roddenberry

"Democracy substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few." - George Bernard Shaw
 

Offline Corsair

  • Gull Wings Rule
  • 29
Poor Setekh
Reply #92 on: February 28, 2002, 08:35:18 pm
Quote
Originally posted by JC Denton
To quote a famous Vasudan:

CO-FEE.  INFERIOR.

:D


:lol:
Wash: This landing's gonna get pretty interesting.
Mal: Define "interesting".
Wash: *shrug* "Oh God, oh God, we're all gonna die"?
Mal: This is the captain. We have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight turbulence and then... explode.
 

Offline WMCoolmon

  • Purveyor of space crack
  • 213
Poor Setekh
Reply #93 on: February 28, 2002, 11:01:19 pm
*Sees Steak's new title*
You do realize that, as an acronym, that would be "EW" which may imply "eww" :D
Quote
Onboard Corsair's Herc. Mk IIIIVXXXX

Isn't it a bit cramped? :confused:
ROFL! Just realized the acronym of my title is "IC" which sounds like "ick"...getting back at me early, I see ;)
-C
 

Offline CP5670

  • Dr. Evil
  • Global Moderator
  • 212
Poor Setekh
Reply #94 on: February 28, 2002, 11:34:28 pm
hehe...this thread is just getting better and better...:D
 

Offline Fineus

  • ...But you *have* heard of me.
  • Administrator
  • 212
    • Hard Light Productions
Poor Setekh
Reply #95 on: March 01, 2002, 01:46:35 am
It's certainly getting weird. We should shoot those responsible....


:snipe: :drevil:
 

Offline Setekh

  • Jar of Clay
  • 215
    • Hard Light Productions
Poor Setekh
Reply #96 on: March 01, 2002, 01:52:21 am
Quote
Originally posted by JC Denton
To quote a famous Vasudan:

CO-FEE.  INFERIOR.

:D


You guys do realise that was me, right? :D
- Eddie Kent Woo, Setekh, Steak (of Steaks), AWACS. Seriously, just pick one.
HARD LIGHT PRODUCTIONS, now V3.0. Bringing Modders Together since January 2001.
THE HARD LIGHT ARRAY. Always makes you say wow.
 

Offline Styxx

  • 211
    • Hard Light Productions
Poor Setekh
Reply #97 on: March 01, 2002, 07:11:38 am
* Back on the Apocalypse, Styxx is still 'arguing' with SHODAN, trying to find a solution that does not involve the death of all of the Apocalypse's crew and creation of several different types of mutant hybrids and cyborgs. *


Styxx: ...and you remember that time I ejected the beta groove? I was laughing for, like hours!

SHODAN: I didn't think that was specially funny.

Styxx: And, and, that other time, with the cyborg assassin... damn, that was funny too. Ah, the good old times.

SHODAN: You didn't look particularly happy by then...

Styxx: I know, I know... it's just that, in retrospective, it was all damn funny. All your dreams about taking over the Earth, the zombies, the mining laser...

SHODAN: I'd have done it, if it wasn't for you, Insect. And now, after hundreds of years, my time has finally arrived! With this ship I'll be able to finish what I started on board the Von Braun!

Styxx: Huh, I don't think so...

SHODAN: Oh, you don't think so?


* Suddenly, electrical discharges kill everyone on the bridge except for Styxx himself, and all lights go out except for the main screen - which is now showing a huge image of SHODAN's avatar. *


SHODAN: This time, Insect, I will succeed!
Probably away. Contact through email.
 

Offline Setekh

  • Jar of Clay
  • 215
    • Hard Light Productions
Poor Setekh
Reply #98 on: March 01, 2002, 07:35:45 am
On board the GVA Setekh

Setekh: Holy cow! This is getting out of hand!
Vasudan #7: You mean because of the troublemaker Loose Cannon? Or are perhaps you refer to the terrifying entity SHODAN, which appears to be torturing that poor Brazillian Admiral?
Setekh: No, no, you fool! This is getting out of hand because I've never played System Shock and so I can't think up a funny, relevant retort!!
Vasudan #7: Oh... I stand corrected...
- Eddie Kent Woo, Setekh, Steak (of Steaks), AWACS. Seriously, just pick one.
HARD LIGHT PRODUCTIONS, now V3.0. Bringing Modders Together since January 2001.
THE HARD LIGHT ARRAY. Always makes you say wow.
 

Offline Styxx

  • 211
    • Hard Light Productions
Poor Setekh
Reply #99 on: March 01, 2002, 08:02:00 am
Ah, you poor soul. You still don't know the wonder and horror of facing SHODAN on your own then... Go buy the games, now!! :D
Probably away. Contact through email.
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