Welcome to Hard Light Productions! Here are the minor offenses, and their corresponding punishments! Never comined "F", "S", or "3" in a thread! This minor offense is usually combated by the use of our standardized Flame-throwers! But, due to budget problems and a few legal concerns (lawyers don't like clients charred to their bones), there is no longer napal in the flame thrower, but rather holy water! Another major offense is disturbing our little buddy (hey! That was my lunch!) called Carl, the resident Shivan who has taken a fancy to living in our walls! Throw him your lunch, and you should be fine... But if you happen to be caught in the wall with Carl, simply take the emergancy saw, and cut off a few limbs! Carl should stop persuit, but if he doesnt... you're on your own! If you wish to leave HLP, simply walk to the back of the ship, and operate the airlocks! The only problem with that choices is the airlocks no longer work! You may check-out any time you wish, but you many not leave HLP! If you should have any concerns, simply walk to the bridge and open up the weapons locker. Inside is your standard AK-47 and Plasma Rifle! However, most of us have a bit of a hard time getting in, as only moderators, the hyper-intelligent shade of blue, and have keys in! If you are a bit weary of staying on HLP, simply blow through the airlock and try to make your way over to the Game-Warden sister-station. Be careful, though! We are out of space suits, and I hear space doesn't have much oxygen... or much of anything! Good luck and enjoy your stay!
That was my (early?) welcome speech, riddled with poor grammar and spelling.
