[Goober5000]

  Excellent.  I wonder if we can't get a HLP Logo on the side

Yes!  We demand a "Sponsored by HLP" bumper sticker on the frame.

[MP-Ryan]

Way late to the party here.  Thieves are the worst; thieves of transportation are scum.

May I suggest that, when you purchase your new bike, you ensure it has a quick-release on the seat pole, and then remove the seat when you lock it outside?  I know a number of people that do this, and the lack of a seat is a remarkable minor deterrent for thieves.

Also, there are bike locks that are made of a hard alloy composite that take quite literally hours to go through with a hack saw.  You might want to check into them.

[Gortef]

Yes!  We demand a "Sponsored by HLP" bumper sticker on the frame.

Also pics if that happens

[swashmebuckle]

Remember how I said my girlfriend's bike was stolen last month? Well, she got it back when the thief (actually a person who borrowed the bike from the presumed thief/black marketeer) brought it in to our local bike shop and the mechanic got a sketchy vibe from the way it had been taped up.

Just goes to show you should always take down your bike's serial number and register it as stolen. Clearly bike thieves aren't exactly on the Professor Moriarty tier of criminal mastermindery.

Interestingly, theft by receipt (the crime that the guy who brought the bike in unknowingly admitted to) actually has a more severe punishment here than the theft itself according to the officer we talked to. So also remember not to borrow things from your sketchy neighbors/family!

[yuezhi]

e: You do not have to resort to buying off the internet. At least you're not in Japan.
http://en.rocketnews24.com/2014/03/12/man-gives-up-on-life-and-travels-1000-miles-on-stolen-bikes-incredible-journey-ends-with-his-arrest

Sometimes when life gets you down, you just want to get away. Run, bike, drive; whatever it takes to get out of the current situation and into a happier state. That’s exactly how one middle-aged man from Chiba Prefecture was feeling when he decided to leave his failing business and begin a nomadic life traveling across Japan. However, his sudden and deliberate flee spanning over an astonishing 1,600 km (nearly 1,000 miles) ended in his arrest five months after it began because of the man’s poor choice in transportation – stolen bikes.

The man, 43-year-old Takahashi Nobugiyo, left his home and failing bar in Kattori, Chiba Prefecture in July of last year after becoming “sick of [his] life.” Over a span of five months, he traveled to Nagano, Niigata, Hiroshima, Kochi, and Miyazaki Prefectures, traveling an estimated distance of at least 1,600 km (1,000 miles) by bike.

Of course, there’s no law against going rogue and deciding to live on the streets, but Mr. Nobugiyo unfortunately stole a few things during his journey. He was discovered sleeping on the streets of Minami-satsuma, Kagoshima Prefecture in December of last year and arrested for allegedly stealing three different bikes in front of pachinko parlors in Niigata, Kochi and Miyazaki. He is also accused of stealing an entire crate of beer valued at 15,000 yen (US$145).

After his arrest, he admitted to living off of stolen food from supermarkets and only had a change of clothes, a small amount of money, and a map of Japan in his possession.

Netizens across Japan were overall supportive of Nobugiyo’s actions, with comments of support such as “With that much will-power, he should be able to do anything” and “Surely, this is a forgivable offense.” Others gave practical alternative methods of the execution of Nobugiyo’s mid-life crisis, suggesting, “He should have done all this with the help of Twitter or Facebook users. Anyone with an old bike would have given it to him or at least treated him to some beer.” Others were completely unhelpful, commenting, “He’s gotta have some muscular calves now” and “Is it okay to ride a bike after drinking beer?”

Mr. Nobugiyo’s quest to find a better life, or at least get away from his current one, was incredible in its longevity and distance. However, we wish he would have refrained from stealing anything. Who knows how long he would have made it if he weren’t thrown in jail.

http://en.rocketnews24.com/2013/06/30/thief-sells-bikes-on-auction-site-and-then-steals-them/

Since the early days of the Internet, online shopping has been fraught with deceit. And, despite the hard work of many companies, there’s still a lot of trepidation when bidding in Internet auctions. Inevitably, anyone is bound to wonder: “Will they really send the goods?” “Are the pictures accurate?” “Are these beautiful bicycles actually soon-to-be stolen items?”

While we never support theft, this is one story where you at least have to admire the criminal’s audacity. It seems that the bicycle in the picture above, which was listed on Yahoo! Auction, is stolen property, which isn’t particularly newsworthy, however scummy it may be. What is newsworthy, though, is that the criminal took the photograph several days before actually stealing anything!

The bicycle pictured above rightfully belongs to Hiroshi Tamura, editor-in-chief of two specialty cycling magazines. On June 17, around midnight, his wife spotted someone running away with bicycles from Tamura’s garage and called the police. Officers soon arrived on the scene and confirmed that three bicycles had been stolen, and then left for the day.

Unfortunately for Mr. Tamura, the next morning provided an even greater shock. Checking the garage around seven am, he found that six more bicycles had gone missing! The criminal had returned to the scene of the crime (again), broken in (again), and ran off with even more bicycles! We must say that this guy or gal sure is one bold thief. We also wonder if maybe Mr. Tamura should invest in a better lock for his garage

But our story isn’t over yet! It turns out that the bicycles had been put up for sale on Yahoo! Auction five days before the thefts occurred. Which means that this master criminal broke into Mr. Tamura’s garage to photograph the bicycles once, put them up for sale, and then came back once more to actually steal them once the bidding was finished.

We don’t want to tell anyone how to do their job, but there’s got to be a more efficient way to do this...

All nine of the stolen bicycles are of high quality, worth a combined total of 2,200,000 yen (US$22,181.94). We can only assume that the winning bidders didn’t realize they were buying stolen property. After all, the thief has a nearly 100 percent positive rating on the auction site, including a very positive comment from the winner of one of the stolen bicycles!

Here’s to hoping the cops catch the thief quickly and recover all of Mr. Tamura’s bicycles.

Spoiler:

public service announcements:
If you are concerned for your sanity, do NOT read the other articles on that site. The articles were quoted here for your convenience.

[Goober5000]

e: You do not have to resort to buying off the internet. At least you're not in Japan.
http://en.rocketnews24.com/2014/03/12/man-gives-up-on-life-and-travels-1000-miles-on-stolen-bikes-incredible-journey-ends-with-his-arrest

  Because screw society!

That guy probably would have been just fine had he used couchsurfing.

[majorvader111]

i will be willing to help E if you can give me the details and what currency you want it in

[The E]

Your willingness to help is appreciated, but it's no longer necessary. If you still want to send money, the details are in the first post ; You can use the currency that is most convenient to you.

[majorvader111]

ok then cheers

[The E]

It occurs to me that I have been remiss at posting a picture. Let me fix that.

[SypheDMar]

Why isn't it red and black?

It's good to know you'll be better off now.

[Grizzly]

Why isn't it red and black?

It makes it more suspectible to thieves .

So, to carry on with that: Why isn't it pink?

[Scourge of Ages]

Gotta admit, for 400E, I was expecting rocket boosters or something 
But it's a nice bike 

[The E]

Having a good powder-coated frame, a reliable gearshift, hub dynamo and V-brakes is enough for me. Rocket boosters are entirely too unsafe (and probably not allowed under german traffic rules anyway).

[rev_posix]

Very nice.  What size wheels are on that, 700cc?

[The E]

Yeah. Although for some godforsaken reason, we call them 28" wheels around here (Seriously, bike measurements are a hodgepodge of units: Frame height is in centimeters, wheel diameter is in inches, and I would assume that more esoteric measurements are used elsewhere).

[Klaustrophobia]

weight in slugs?