>>Personal log, Derrick "Iron" Hansen
>>Topic: Thoughts and Reflection
>>Planetfall is tomorrow- guess this will be my last "night" in this little cabin. I won't miss bumping my head on the bunk rim, but after 8 months, even a cardboard box would start to feel homey. That's assuming I can even manage to sleep. I haven't been this wired since the last Solaris heavy-division finals..... this is even worse. Having to worry about your own skin is troubling enough, but now I'm responsible for all the men and women I've brought onto my "crusade".
>>Hah, "crusade". Amazing how that word carries such a powerfully good connotation despite the ugliness that any history book could reveal in minutes. Hmm..... [BEVERAGE BEING SIPPED] Maybe in a time when so many are fighting for murky reasons, perhaps being driven by something as simple as profit imparts a certain.... purity to one's cause. I really am trying to hold onto some higher purpose here. The Succession Wars simply keep going... so much good has been taken out of the world. I may not be the kind of man to really create anything, but I can be damn certain I remove some bad things from this universe. You know, that's not a bad line. Maybe I can work that into a pep speech for the troops.
>>It might be impossible to overstate how great a logistician Quinn has been. I've never been that big on anything not 'mech-related, but Quinn has a true talent for managing behind-the-scenes stuff.... and people! A roster full of warriors, and a surprising number of people with extra perks too: Pvt. Pilar's share of the family astro-shipping business, which has become a sizeable stake in the Iron Knights, Sgt. Segura's earnings from his acting career, and Tech Zajgla, who'll be able to hop from fixing to dismanting 'mechs once she finishes her formal training.
>>(sigh) My brain feels like a flipbook at 600 frames per second, and I didn't even drink any of the turbocharged turpentine the galley calls "coffee". HM! Doens't matter. I'm basically Company Dad now, and I need to be able to shoulder that responsibility. Best way to do that is to take care of myself. Can't say I'm taking care of myself if I'm not sleeping. [LOCKER OPENS, CLOTHING RUSTLES] Maybe a good lift or four will help me clear my head a bit. Hey computer! [COMMAND PHRASE] End recording.
"Company Dad". Man, the **** I come up with. Memo to self, don't go back through this log unless I want exposure to critical levels of cringe. heheh....
Father.... Mother..... why can't I remember you? How can I be a "dad" to anybody if I don't even remember being raised?