1. The hero of the film, Johnathan Cabot, is an irritating short ass wuss.
2. He uses "His own special karate". Gymkata. A fusion of karate and olympic gymnastics which relies heavily on convenient access to gymnastics equipment should a confrontation arise.
3. Johnathan Cabot is sent to Parmistan, a small eastern European country filled with conveniently accessible gymnastics equipment.
4. Parimistan immigration policy states that anyone who enters Parmistan must play "the game". If you win "the game" you get to live. Nobody has won the game in 900 years.
5. Parmistan has a "village of the crazies" (aka "village of the damned"). Possibly due to 900 years of inbreeding caused by their immigration policy. The crazies who live here cut the buttocks out of their trousers.
6. The Parmistani language consists of one word. "Yakmala!". Due to the limitations of this language everyone generally just speaks English.
7. Parmistan has a "salt mine". Which consists of a huge pile of refined salt which two blokes half heartedly prod at for hours on end.
8. Cabot trains to compete in "the game" by walking up flights of stairs on his hands, and claims that "At least he can out sleep them!".
9. Knowing how Xenophobic the Parmistani people are, Cabot turns up wearing red white and blue. He wanted to bring a cowboy hat but his spymaster drew the line there.
10. Every fight scene in Gymkata are played out using the same 4 or 5 canned sound effects.
A friend of mine gave me a dvd copy of this movie the other day and I watched if over last night and absolutely laughed my socks off. I know that watching bad movies isn't everyone's cup of tea. If on the other hand you can laugh at this kind of stuff I urge you to seek out Gymkata. I am sure now more than ever, this movie is a cult classic.
