[Black Wolf]

I was sitting around the other day, thinking about stuff, when I kind of thought to myself - "You know, I'm a pretty cool guy." And you know what? I am. But the question I found myself with at that point was: Why, exactly, do I kick so much arse? What is it that has placed me in this position? Is there a defineable set of my characteristics that have allowed me ascend into the highest echelons of superbidity? Is superbidity really a word? So, I remained seated (but I was on an office style chair, so I sort of rolled myself to another part of the room) and came up with a definitive list of what sets me apart. The following are excerpts from that list. This post is not comprehensive, and I may have to add more stuff later.

• Reason 1 - Sticks
  
  

  OK. So, to most people, a stick is a stick. But me - I can understand them in a way most people can't. I think me and sticks (Not that forum member guy by the way - ex tree sticks) have some kind of... supernatural link. I can do things with sticks normal people couldn't do with... stuff other than sticks. I once used sticks to accelerate certain specific subatomic particles to a significant franction of C, thus advancing nuclear physics something like thirty years. I also once got into a termite fishing competition with a chimpanzee and managed to win pretty convincingly.

  
  
  
• Reason 2 - My Superior Sense of Timing
  
  

  Time kicks arse. I control my own time like a remote control controls things that are remote. My entire life revolves around a complex, but perfectly harmonious, rhythm that flows at the speed of life itself. I can also make any joke much funnier by timing it right and have so far never been at the wrong place at the wrong time. I also know when it's time to leave parties, even before the gay people do.

  
  
  
• Reason 3 - Whales Love Me
  
  

  It's true. I know it's hard to believe, but whales ****ing love me. Whales, man. Whenever I get in the water, they're all like "Ohmigod!" and they bloody near swarm me. It's like I'm all 4 of the whale Beatles rolled into one. They're always swimming up and trying to say hi and stuff, but of course, in whale, that's kind of like "mmmmmmmmmmmmm... mwork mwork mwork... mmmmmmmmmiiii" so I kind of just have to nod and smile and swim carefully. So obviously, the whales think they're onto something - that's gotta count in my favour, surely. Besides, this particular facet of my awesomeness has human world applications as well - CSIRO have discovered two new subspecies of pilot whale just by watching when I go for a swim.

  
  
  
• Reason 4 - Hot Blonde Lesbians
  
  

  The way I figure it, anyone who can work "Hot Blonde Lesbians" into a list of reasons why he's so damned awesome is pretty bloody awesome.

  
  
  
• Reason 5 - I Invented the Word 'Superbidity
  
  

  E-mails were winging their way through cyberspace towards Dictionary.com as we would have been speaking if this were a conversation and you were not reading this on a web forum.

  
  
  
• Reason 6 - Cheese
  
  

  At any given time, I have no less than four different types of cheese available for my consumption. This makes me a superior human being in nine out of the twenty-six relevant categories, which is a pretty big chunk, when you think about it.

[/COLOR]

[Ford Prefect]

I also know when it's time to leave parties, even before the gay people do.

Haha!

All in all, I have to say your case is iron-clad. I was sort of skeptical until I got to Reason 6.

[kode]

it all comes down to the cheese.

WHAT KIND OF CHEESE?

[Grey Wolf]

I'm sorry. I'm against cheese, if I remember my final status in the CLF thing at WS. Or wait, maybe I defected to an0n's mercenary faction...

[Taristin]

Originally posted by Black Wolf

• Reason 3 - Whales Love Me
  
  

  It's true. I know it's hard to believe, but whales ****ing love me. Whales, man. Whenever I get in the water, they're all like "Ohmigod!" and they bloody near swarm me. It's like I'm all 4 of the whale Beatles rolled into one. They're always swimming up and trying to say hi and stuff, but of course, in whale, that's kind of like "mmmmmmmmmmmmm... mwork mwork mwork... mmmmmmmmmiiii" so I kind of just have to nod and smile and swim carefully. So obviously, the whales think they're onto something - that's gotta count in my favour, surely. Besides, this particular facet of my awesomeness has human world applications as well - CSIRO have discovered two new subspecies of pilot whale just by watching when I go for a swim.

  
   [/COLOR] [/B]

Ahh, so this is you, then?

[Taristin]

Originally posted by Raa


Ahh, so this is you, then?

Especially the whales saying : "Mm, work me!" Not helping your case, you pervert.

EDIT: Umm... I meant to hit edit. Blast, I'm daft today.

[Night Hammer]

damn you Raa...that thing again

[Night Hammer]

Originally posted by Black Wolf

• Reason 4 - Hot Blonde Lesbians
  
  

  The way I figure it, anyone who can work "Hot Blonde Lesbians" into a list of reasons why he's so damned awesome is pretty bloody awesome.

  
  
  [/COLOR] [/B]

good work on that btw:yes: :thepimp:

[Clave]

Cheese eh?

Time lay down some cheese oppresion I feel:

[Carl]

[Scuddie]

****ing Black Wolf...

[redsniper]

This has inspired me to think about my own awesomeness. Although it doesn't match BW's there are some good aspects the most notable of which I believe is my car. I drive what should be a sports car, a '93 Ford Mustang hatchback, but it has a four cylinder engine and the speedometer only goes to 85 mph (that's slow kph). It has roll down windows, a sunroof with no cover that leaks in the rain, one wiper blade, no alarm, no remote to lock/unlock it, and just the right amount of scratches for me to not care if it gets more but still look good. It has a 5-speed manual transmission but still gets only decent gas mileage and until recently it was leaking anti-freeze. Despite this crappiness it has nice alloy wheels and wide tires that belong on a much faster car. To top things off, it's turqoise.

[Corhellion]

...Wow...All this time we thought you were crazy...

...now it makes sense...

*cough*Maddox*cough*

[Corsair]

No, ya think?

[Martinus]

[color=66ff00]I find your Superbidity superfluous but other than that you're ok in my books.


[/color]

[Sandwich]

Had this been posted by an0n or Cobra or some such person, would it not have been locked as spam?


Just an observation.

[Martinus]

Originally posted by Sandwich
Had this been posted by an0n or Cobra or some such person, would it not have been locked as spam?


Just an observation.

[color=66ff00]I figure he gets brownie points for posting clever spam.
[/color]

[Grey Wolf]

Since an0n isn't here to lead the Grand Confectionary against you heathen cheese-lovers, I'll have to brink it in for him: