[Stryke 9]

*whap*

*crash*

[blows the smoke off of 40-pound wheeled backpack]

What's more, it's at least two years old. It's doubly unfashionable. Come and get it.

[LAW ENFORCER]

Em didn't have time to read ALL of those but general felling is not lost.

I have had simliar experiences (werid its like people run in patterns or something... )

Any way!

When people make fun of you, if they are a force laugh at theri jokes! I was made fun of for my hair (big they called me affroman (before that song thing) and my dress sense, bag, accent - apparently its STILL english! ??? I live in scotland for over 16 years now! Dear me! Em... Anyway I found these jokes to actualy funny (yes about me, well they were) so I laughed they just though I was weirder but many didn't bother me (Have never got into a fight apart from primary school... (smacked some guys head into a scotish wall (badly made, rockes jutting out every were... coninicidently... that worked too). One thing I know for a fact is doing what they do back at them never works... just makes em come back at you with more power, more ideas and more horrible things to say or do
HOwever, in my view there is a time to laugh, a time to walk away and a time to bring the big guns out and humilitate your ENEMY! (sorry, to much 'Disturbed' ... what?)

(take note countrys who like war! Britain! Get those troops back here!!! Iraq could invade Britain and we would stand no chance! Aside from the logistics of Iraq getting here and the NATO thing were allies might send a coiple of troops to help out (clean up the bodies anyway))

[Knight Templar]

A think the scots are a little more prone to fighting then brits

And there is no such thing as too much Disturbed dude

[LAW ENFORCER]

Brits means scots + welsh + english + Northan Irish +a little island of spain (well kinda:nervous: )
Usually anyway...

yes, True on other point however:D

[Black Wolf]

The only time I've ever known anyone to gain any sort of respect for walking away was only after he'd turned up and the other guy refused to throw a punch, so he walked away. In all other situations, the guy who walks away/doesn't show gets jeered at and in most cases ends up being challenged and/or attacked more and more times because the challenger knows he's in no danger.

As for the name calling, it's kind of something you're going to have to live with. It can'tbe all that bad, if it was spawned by something a teacher said. When I changed schools, I got called a lot of stuff I didn't like at first - people were calling me by my surname and variations on it. T first, it pissed me off - I'd been called by my first name for the last 12 years after all. Ultimately though, I realized that it didn't matter, so I gave up worrying about it, ultimately got used to it until it was weird when one pof them called me by my first name. I even used one of the variations as the nickname on my leavers top. If your friends are calling you by it, and they really are enough of your friends to care how you feel, then they obviously see nothing wrong with it, so why should you? I've played hockey against people who get called (and call themselves) some pretty bad things, and they like it.

Live with it, then concentrate on the bvriefcase thing - it'll work out.

[01010]

I can't understand why people care to be honest. People call you names even if they don't know you and that to me just means they're an asshole, the long and short of it. They're the ones with the problem so why the **** should I give a ****?

Make friends with other people. Worked for me.

[Goober5000]

I've read this thread and it's very interesting.  I suppose the situation will be different for everybody, but here's my experience:

I was taunted and made fun of all throughout school up until a year into high school (when I was in 10th grade - 16 years old for those of you not familiar with the U.S. system).  There really didn't seem to be any rationale, even in hindsight - people just needed someone to pick on.  The way I got through it was with a great deal of moral support from my family (especially my mom - God bless her), plus keeping on my best behavior and making friends with the teachers in case I ever needed backup.  I didn't have many consistent friends until maybe 6th grade, and I tended to compartmentalize school and home life, keeping them separate and just putting up with school - it was for learning, nothing more.

I ran the gamut of guidance counselors, and they frankly weren't much help.  I tried the standard regimen of ignoring - that didn't work either.  Eleanor Roosevelt said, "Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent" and although that might work pretty well for mature adults, for children words are so powerful that they can be smothering.  And the common saying that bullies have low self-esteem didn't seem true either.  Maybe deep down inside they have low self-esteem, but outwardly (and perhaps even to themselves) their self-esteem is quite high.

Fortunately confrontations rarely turned violent (and I didn't experience violence at all after elementary school), and I tried my hardest to avoid any group that looked like it was out for a fight.  When it did turn violent, I tried to either surrender quickly or escape - usually in elementary school the kids just wanted the playground ball I was holding.

Now here's a generally reliable and accepted playground rule - if someone comes after you and you fight back, they'll leave you alone, go pick on someone else, and warn their friends too - and you'll be free.  It's best to do this when you're only accosted by a single person - other kids will rather watch than get involved.  Unfortunately, this no longer works in the U.S. - either the teachers will discipline you exactly the same as the bully (which, in elementary school, is one of the most ludicrous applications of justice ever conceived) or you may even get sued.  This worked for a cousin of mine in the U.K., but in the U.S., it's not worth the attempt.  Self-defense is useful if you find yourself in deep trouble with no way out, but the best strategy is to tell someone in charge.  Preferably someone who will do something, not someone who doesn't care.

Basically, I just endured it - avoiding the bullies whenever I could.  But my patience and perserverance paid off when I graduated high school... I was class salutatorian, president of two different clubs, and practically the student ambassador to the school administration, while many of the bullies graduated by the skin of their teeth.  I can only say that what goes around comes around - just be patient.  Again, the situation is different for everyone - for kasperl, perhaps the best solution (as already mentioned) would to carry a backpack instead of a briefcase.

A final word of encouragement - my mom said something when I was still in elementary school that seems very profound now that I'm a more mature Christian - "God gave you [the bullies] to make you strong."  I've thought about that a lot recently, and she's right.  Even though it's a cliche, it's true - suffering builds character, and at the end you'll be able to say that coming through the rough experience helped you to become a better person.  Just don't give up.

[Stealth]

OK i realize the majority of the community here are nerds who are always getting bullied (or always did)... has anyone here NOT been bullied?  cause i can't recall one post from someone who hadn't.

fighting is not the answer... fighting doesn't help... when you're being bullied, fighting will not solve the problem...ever, you should know that by now.

i'm sure all of you that have been bullied never actually did fight back, so now when you look back you think "hey, that might have worked!"... well it won't

EDIT:
perhaps people will call you a coward etc. for walking away from a fight, but even if you don't get respect, eventually people don't mess with you, because they know that you won't fight back, so what's the point.

oh, and knight_templar, when a 'group' of people tries to fight you, there's no way you're going to win, so you FIND a way out of it, even if you have to RUN away.

... or you could stay and fight... you might even get one hit in before the crap's beaten out of you

[wEvil]

mostly i just take my top off and flash a few scars and thats sufficient to make most arseholes can it.

School wasnt fun for me at all, I mostly drifted through it without too much trouble but being a rather sensitive soul life in general is slightly more difficult for most people.

Things change at university quite a bit, usually you find a bunch of people on your wavelength and you can stick to them - one peice of advice though:  if you're not sure about someone and they're babbling about living with you next year, DONT GO WITH IT because it WILL screw everything up.

[Stryke 9]

Stealth: Can't beat a group? Whup one or two of the ones in charge and the rest back off- the followers are jackals, they back off if there's nobody doing the fighting for them. And since all it really takes is knocking the air out of those one or two or getting them on the ground for the others to back off, not that challenging. And then when the "leaders" see that their backup's gone, they'll clear, too.

[Stealth]

Originally posted by StrykeIX
Stealth: Can't beat a group? Whup one or two of the ones in charge and the rest back off- the followers are jackals, they back off if there's nobody doing the fighting for them. And since all it really takes is knocking the air out of those one or two or getting them on the ground for the others to back off, not that challenging. And then when the "leaders" see that their backup's gone, they'll clear, too.

oooh i see, so you take down the leaders (that's you vs. a few people, but hey, that's easy right?) and the rest leave you alone?

no, you don't get respect for fighting people, not at all.

[kasperl]

í've read this thread, and i am very glad about al of the support here.

i first want to respond to those who say: "get a backpack". i don't carry this briefcase to be special,just because it carry's easier (IMO) and it helps keeping my books in on piece. i also don't feellike givong in to the bullies. because if i do, it would take about a week for them to think of something else to harras me with.

for those who say that violence is the answer:
i tried, trust me. when i got bullyed back in elementary, i got angry, very fast. fighting was a regular experience for me. and i didn't like it. because of my temper i can't get into any foght without losing control, completely. and that's one thing i really don't want to happen. i also don't think i can handle 5 or 10 kids about my size or bigger. i'm not heavily build, and i will get my ass kicked. on the other hand, also back in elementary, i once actually won a fight, i got 2 whole months without bullying as a result.

for those who say violence isn't the answer:
i also tried ignoring , as well in elementary as in high school. and i just can't do it anymore. not after this many years. i really respect those who can, but i'm not one of tose happy few. i don't want to fight,and i can restrain myselfmost of the time, bvut i can't do it forever, and i fear the day when i will snap, and note,that's a when, not an if.

i also tried going to a teacher, but:
my class teacher won't do ****, he's one of those ypes who become class theacher so they can brag to the parents, ut i just won't do **** if something really happens. and the teacher who is responsible forn the entire year, can't much since those kids will just go on the moment she turns her back.

i think i'll just trie to put with this, and take it out on some shivans in FS2. but i doubt that that will help tough......

latest development:
the kids are throwing bigger peaces of food at me, it'was just some small M&M`s till now, but they switched to entire sandwiches at a time. on of my friends said (half jokingly)"go sit at another table, i don't want to get hit"


for al of those who were(or are) going thru the same thing, good luck,it will stop, but it might take a few years......

[Stryke 9]

Stealth: Actually, yes. You generally end up coming out worse off than anyone else for the one fight, but they think twice about a rematch if you did some damage and the ones who started it and you had to hurt aren't gonna be rallying any groups outta THOSE kids any time soon- the ultimate loss of face, "losing" with the odds stacked on your side.

Kasperl: Yeah, it mostly boils down to controlling not only how you act, but how you think. The not giving a crap works excellently, but it's something you have to learn. You can train yourself for better self-control (the meditation crap helps quite a lot, surprisingly), or you can wait a few years, when a degree of it comes naturally. Either way, there's no quick fix.

In the meantime, don't bring a lunch to school and snag one of those sandwiches instead. Make the best of a bad situation.

[Goober5000]

Wait till you get to college.  You start with a clean slate, nobody knows you, and nobody cares if you carry a briefcase.

[kasperl]

Originally posted by StrykeIX

In the meantime, don't bring a lunch to school and snag one of those sandwiches instead. Make the best of a bad situation.

1) that's grose
2) no way,i have to eat half a loaf of brwon bread just to keep walking upright.

ok,enough with the funny stuff

i think i might be able to hold myself for about 3months, and by that time, they will have found someone/something else to anoy(i hope they get some sense en stop though)

[Stealth]

Originally posted by StrykeIX
Stealth: Actually, yes. You generally end up coming out worse off than anyone else for the one fight, but they think twice about a rematch if you did some

if it's you (and you're small and weak, in kasper's case) against at LEAST 2 'leaders' as you put it... you're not going to do any damage... none at all... you probably won't even get one punch through, and even if you do, how much damage will that be.

[01010]

Originally posted by kasperl


latest development:
the kids are throwing bigger peaces of food at me, it'was just some small M&M`s till now, but they switched to entire sandwiches at a time. on of my friends said (half jokingly)"go sit at another table, i don't want to get hit"


for al of those who were(or are) going thru the same thing, good luck,it will stop, but it might take a few years......

Ok, so, I very rarely lose my temper, last time I did was when I was like 11 or 12, saw red, flipped, pinned someone twice my size against a wall. But I digress, if they were throwing whole sandwiches at me I think it might push me over the edge. I would seriously ****ing flip the table on them and stamp on their faces while they were on the floor and I would not stop until someone made me.

But that's just me and I'm not a violent person.

[kasperl]

one problem, altough i'm just as tall as those guys, i'm twice as thin. i wouldn't stand a chance. and as i said before, i don't want to fight, not again.

[Stealth]

Originally posted by kasperl
one problem, altough i'm just as tall as those guys, i'm twice as thin. i wouldn't stand a chance. and as i said before, i don't want to fight, not again.

see Stryke?  what did i tell you!

don't fight, walk away, ignoreo them

[01010]

Originally posted by kasperl
one problem, altough i'm just as tall as those guys, i'm twice as thin. i wouldn't stand a chance. and as i said before, i don't want to fight, not again.

Seriously, I'm the least violent person you could ever meet, I hate confrontation and will do ANYTHING to not fight, but I mean, there's taking no notice and then there's being **** on and letting people walk all over you.

You don't have to go ape**** on them, just stand up to them and you'd be suprised how much they'd back down.

Have you got any friends that could back you up?