Procrastination is a wonderful thing. Originally posted in an SCP thread after I gave a new member the traditional Welcome Beam greeting and spiel:
Originally posted by Fry_Day
doesn't that [i.e. the Welcome Beam and greeting] get a bit old?
(Sesquipedalian, in fake Yiddish accent)
We fire beams as a greeting. Sounds crazy, no? But in our little forum of HLP, you might say every one of us is a firer of BFGreens, trying to blast out a brilliant, powerful beam without overloading our reactors. It isn't easy. You may ask, why do we keep shooting them if it's so dangerous? We shoot them because Hard Light Productions is our home... And how do we keep our reactors from overloading? That I can tell you in one word...
Tradition.
(Chorus)
Tradition, tradition... tradition
Tradition, tradition... tradition
(Sesquipedalian)
Because of our traditions, we've kept our reactors in balance for many, many years. Here at HLP we have traditions for everything... how to mod, how to FRED, even, how to post spam. For instance, we always keep our heads covered with anti-Hammer-of-Justice helmets and always use a beam-free-all sexp... This shows our constant devotion to the V-gods. You may ask, how did this tradition start? I'll tell you - I don't know. But it's a tradition... Because of our traditions, everyone knows who he is and what the admins expect him to do.
(The Admins)
Who day and night
Must scramble to keep spam down
Manage all the forums
Handle FTP requests
And who has the right
As master of the board
To have the final word in 0Wnage?
(All)
The admin, the admins... tradition
The admin, the admins... tradition
(The Fredders)
Who must know the way to make a proper mission
A balanced mission, a challenging mission
Who must script the sexps and make the campaign run
So the project lead is free to oversee the fun?
(All)
The Fredder, the Fredders... tradition
The Fredder, the Fredders... tradition
(The Modellers)
At three I started Truespace
At ten I learned my MAX
I hear they want a fighter or three
I hope... the textures turn out pretty
(All)
The modellers, the modellers... tradition
The modellers, the modellers... tradition
(The Coders)
We work with code and functions
To enhance the engine.
Add cool stuff! Kill the bugs!
Coding in our dungeon.
(All)
The coders, the coders... tradition
The coders, the coders... tradition
(The Spammers)
And who posts the pointless words
To humor, annoy and confuse
Derailing all the threads
To give admins something to do?
(All)
The spammers, the spammers... tradition
(Admin #1)
We have too many spammers!
(All)
The spammers, the spammers... tradition
(Repeat as round)
(Admins)
The admins
(Fredders)
The Fredders
(Modellers)
The modellers
(Coders)
The coders
(Spammers)
The spammers
(All)
Tradition
(Admins)
The admins
(Fredders)
The Fredders
(Modellers)
The modellers
(Coders)
The coders
(Spammers)
The spammers
(All)
Tradition
(Sesquipedalian)
And in the circle of our little forum, we have always had our special types. For instance, ZylonBane, the sarcastic man...
(N00b #1)
can someone hlep me how do I get beams to fire they wont werk no matter what
(ZylonBane)
Well, before we can tell you, you'll have to learn English.
(Sesquipedalian)
And Thund... er, Kalfireth, the not-so-ex-admin...
(Stryke 9)
M'eh. Here's a half-assed experimental render.
(Kalfireth)
Not bad, Stryke, not bad at all! Needs more ambient lighting on the far side.
(Stryke 9)
Thanks. I still think Thunder is a better handle than Kerfaffle, Thunder.
(Kalfireth)
I changed my handle. Get used to it!
(Stryke 9)
So you're having an identity crisis, why should I suffer?
(Sesquipedalian)
And of course, our beloved Shrike...
(Shrike)
User titles: Anyone whining about wanting new ones will have theirs set to "Member". Understood?
(an0n)
*whines about user title*
*wonders if it will be changed to "Shrikey's whiny little *****"*
(Shrike)
I think we can manage that.
(an0n)
Pink? It's written in PINK?!!?!
*goes off to the The-Rift to take out repressed agression on some tards*
(Sesquipedalian)
And among ourselves, we get along perfectly well. Of course, there was that tiff between Stealth and Knight Templar, but that's all settled now. Now we live in simple peace and harmony and...
(Knight Templar)
I'm putting you on my ignore list.
(Stealth)
That's what you said last time, too.
(Chorus)
Flame!
Argue!
Flame!
Argue!
Tradition, tradition... tradition
Tradition, tradition... tradition
(Sesquipedalian)
"Tradition. Without our traditions, our forum would be as shaky as... as beam cannons on a Typhon!"
