Author Topic: Funny site.  (Read 2603 times)

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Offline Sandwich

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*throws an0n some raw meat*

Go eat, boy - betcha it tastes a lot better than my leg.
SERIOUSLY...! | {The Sandvich Bar} - Rhino-FS2 Tutorial | CapShip Turret Upgrade | The Complete FS2 Ship List | System Background Package

"...The quintessential quality of our age is that of dreams coming true. Just think of it. For centuries we have dreamt of flying; recently we made that come true: we have always hankered for speed; now we have speeds greater than we can stand: we wanted to speak to far parts of the Earth; we can: we wanted to explore the sea bottom; we have: and so  on, and so on: and, too, we wanted the power to smash our enemies utterly; we have it. If we had truly wanted peace, we should have had that as well. But true peace has never been one of the genuine dreams - we have got little further than preaching against war in order to appease our consciences. The truly wishful dreams, the many-minded dreams are now irresistible - they become facts." - 'The Outward Urge' by John Wyndham

"The very essence of tolerance rests on the fact that we have to be intolerant of intolerance. Stretching right back to Kant, through the Frankfurt School and up to today, liberalism means that we can do anything we like as long as we don't hurt others. This means that if we are tolerant of others' intolerance - especially when that intolerance is a call for genocide - then all we are doing is allowing that intolerance to flourish, and allowing the violence that will spring from that intolerance to continue unabated." - Bren Carlill

 

Offline Grey Wolf

So would the"Christian Repair Shop" listed on that page sit there and pray for your window to be fixed by God?

EDIT: Also, WTF is this?
Quote
From http://www.fixedearth.com/nasas_agenda.htm:
Clearly, the evolutionary belief is anti-Bible, but--more to the point about NASA's goals being spiritual--it is a belief that attributes miraculous powers of creation of all that exists to a "force" or a god known as "matter" (and "gases"). Matter did it all. All hail "matter"! No God who demands recognition and accountability is needed! With "matter" as creator we can do what we want ('cause nothing matters...)
« Last Edit: October 11, 2003, 04:33:34 pm by 102 »
You see things; and you say "Why?" But I dream things that never were; and I say "Why not?" -George Bernard Shaw

 

Offline Sandwich

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It's either a more-in-depth than usual satire site, or else run by weirdoes.
SERIOUSLY...! | {The Sandvich Bar} - Rhino-FS2 Tutorial | CapShip Turret Upgrade | The Complete FS2 Ship List | System Background Package

"...The quintessential quality of our age is that of dreams coming true. Just think of it. For centuries we have dreamt of flying; recently we made that come true: we have always hankered for speed; now we have speeds greater than we can stand: we wanted to speak to far parts of the Earth; we can: we wanted to explore the sea bottom; we have: and so  on, and so on: and, too, we wanted the power to smash our enemies utterly; we have it. If we had truly wanted peace, we should have had that as well. But true peace has never been one of the genuine dreams - we have got little further than preaching against war in order to appease our consciences. The truly wishful dreams, the many-minded dreams are now irresistible - they become facts." - 'The Outward Urge' by John Wyndham

"The very essence of tolerance rests on the fact that we have to be intolerant of intolerance. Stretching right back to Kant, through the Frankfurt School and up to today, liberalism means that we can do anything we like as long as we don't hurt others. This means that if we are tolerant of others' intolerance - especially when that intolerance is a call for genocide - then all we are doing is allowing that intolerance to flourish, and allowing the violence that will spring from that intolerance to continue unabated." - Bren Carlill

 

Offline kode

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the funnies thing is how "God bless the USA" was withing quotation marks. it makes it seem ironic, as if I would've written it.
Pray, v. To ask that the laws of the universe be annulled in behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.
- Ambrose Bierce
<Redfang> You're almost like Stryke 9 or an0n
"Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored."
- Aldous Huxley
WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH

  

Offline Kosh

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Probably what I thought was the most rediculous was the whole "Apple is promoting evolutionism and communism..." thing.
"The reason for this is that the original Fortran got so convoluted and extensive (10's of millions of lines of code) that no-one can actually figure out how it works, there's a massive project going on to decode the original Fortran and write a more modern system, but until then, the UK communication network is actually relying heavily on 35 year old Fortran that nobody understands." - Flipside

Brain I/O error
Replace and press any key

 

Offline Rictor

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ok, its a semi-old thread, but Ive been away for a while and just thought I'de show you some gems from the site:

The Internet was created by the United States of America - a Christian nation [ref. 1, 2, 3] - and should not be used to spread anti-Christian, secular, or non-Christian propaganda and hatespeech. This is our Internet, and we should exercise our position as its owners and as the guardians of civilization to stop its misuse.

The inent of the Internet is the exact opposite. Anarchy of information. If your views are right and powerful, you'll win out in the end anyways, so no worries ;) ;)

The current design, although obviously beautiful and rich in the pageantry of American history, doesn't fully convey the nature of our Nation to today's ignorant people. In years past, additional information about America and the Values we hold dear would be supplied via our schools and media, allowing our citizens to associate the Flag with these cultural and social facts. However, nowadays these institutions can't be trusted as they have come under the sway of the Secular Elite and more often than not spew the virus of anti-Americanism rather than healthy civic instruction. As such, the confused American citizen of today doesn't know what to associate Old Glory with, and is just as likely to want to burn it as to pledge his allegiance to it. Furthermore, those few still in the know who take the time to pledge their allegiance are under pressure from decadent Secular forces to divorce the symbol of our Nation from He Who makes our Nation strong and righteous: The Lord, Almighty God.

Proposed new design:



Awesome :lol: :lol:

While many Christians correctly see Halloween as a time of occult dangers - when Satan is out in force trying to corrupt our society - they overlook the fact that all things are created by the Lord for a purpose. So what is the purpose of this dark time of the year?

All they need in Junny Harper (King of the Hill reference)

Called "Mall Rats" in their nihilistic Secular culture, they can often be found hanging around malls after public school doing nothing constructive. Teens paradoxically desire to be "different" but also to fit in. Use this contradiction to your advantage by pointing out how all the people around them are "tools to Secularism" while offering them the chance to join in the Love of Christ. Emphasize "coolness" of Jesus and offer "Radical Salvation". Secularized teens usually can't read too well, so hand out colorful stickers instead of pamphlets.

Damn teens!!

Almost exclusively male. These shoppers are harried and often confused and consequently will be more susceptible to Secular programming. The pressure to consume will have them at a breaking point. Use a very hard sell, appealing to their desire for release from the slavery of Consumerism, and they can be easily snapped. The closer to December 25, the more likely they will be to completely abandon their Secular Consumer lifestyle on the spot. If you are targeting these lost souls, be sure to bring a van so that you can take them back to your Church for counseling and emergency baptisms.

Bust open the Flanders emerncy baptism kit:):) And don't forget to bring a mysterious van to take kids away in, I'm sure that'll go over REAL well with the cops.

"Darth Maul": Commercialized symbol of evil whose name sounds like "mall". Coincidence?
Even the word "mall" evokes evilness being a homonym for "maul" - the violent rending of flesh

Gotta love that circle-logic..

However, these propagandists aren't just targeting the young. Take for example Apple Computers, makers of the popular Macintosh line of computers. The real operating system hiding under the newest version of the Macintosh operating system (MacOS X) is called... Darwin! That's right, new Macs are based on Darwinism! While they currently don't advertise this fact to consumers, it is well known among the computer elite, who are mostly Atheists and Pagans. Furthermore, the Darwin OS is released under an "Open Source" license, which is just another name for Communism. They try to hide all of this under a facade of shiny, "lickable" buttons, but the truth has finally come out: Apple Computers promote Godless Darwinism and Communism.

Darwin eh? That probably explains the crashes and lockups. Remember kids, only Microsoft is the godly allternative. Open-source is for Communists and hippies :lol: :lol:

If you find an Atheist in your neighborhood,TELL A PARENT OR PASTOR RIGHT AWAY! You may be moved to try and witness to these poor lost souls yourself, however AVOID TALKING TO THEM! Atheists are often very grumpy and bitter and will lash out at children or they may even try to trick you into neglecting God's Word. Very advanced witnessing techniques are needed for these grouches. Let the adults handle them.

Lets fool kids into going on witch-hunts for us. It'll be fun!!
« Last Edit: October 13, 2003, 07:45:06 pm by 644 »

 

Offline an0n

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Quote
Originally posted by Rictor The Internet was created by the United States of America - a Christian nation [ref. 1, 2, 3] - and should not be used to spread anti-Christian, secular, or non-Christian propaganda and hatespeech. This is our Internet, and we should exercise our position as its owners and as the guardians of civilization to stop its misuse.

The inent of the Internet is the exact opposite. Anarchy of information. If your views are right and powerful, you'll win out in the end anyways, so no worries ;) ;)

~-=™! WTF have you been smoking? The internets roots lie in ARPAnet which was developed by the US military. It was designed to allow US commanders enough 'freedom of information' to know who the hell to nuke. !™=-~

Proposed new design:



Awesome :lol: :lol:

~-=™! See, this is why no-one takes these people seriously: No feckin sk1llz. !™=-~

~-=™! *snips a ton of mindless drivel* !™=-~

"Darth Maul": Commercialized symbol of evil whose name sounds like "mall". Coincidence?

~-=™! It also 'sounds' like 'maul', therefore all bears are to now be considered in the service of Satan and baptised on sight. !™=-~
 
Even the word "mall" evokes evilness being a homonym for "maul" - the violent rending of flesh

~-=™! ....Usually used in a non-lethal context. !™=-~

Gotta love that circle-logic..

~-=™! ARGH! Irony! And it's 'circular'. !™=-~[/size]


I hate organized religion as much as the next anarchistic, aetheist militant, but I hate actual stupidity even more. Don't criticize unless you're perfect.
"I.....don't.....CARE!!!!!" ---- an0n
"an0n's right. He's crazy, an asshole, not to be trusted, rarely to be taken seriously, and never to be allowed near your mother. But, he's got a knack for being right. In the worst possible way he can find." ---- Yuppygoat
~-=~!@!~=-~ : Nodewar.com

 

Offline Rictor

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Opinions noted. Opinions ridiculed. Opinions ignored.

I'm not about to enter into a flamewar, but feel free to keep trying..
« Last Edit: October 13, 2003, 07:52:59 pm by 644 »

 

Offline an0n

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That's rather arrogant of you to presume that I'd bother engaging in a flame-war with you. Not to put too fine a point on it, but I'd rather have an intellectual duel with a carrot.
"I.....don't.....CARE!!!!!" ---- an0n
"an0n's right. He's crazy, an asshole, not to be trusted, rarely to be taken seriously, and never to be allowed near your mother. But, he's got a knack for being right. In the worst possible way he can find." ---- Yuppygoat
~-=~!@!~=-~ : Nodewar.com

 

Offline Galemp

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I... this... but... no.



My roomate works for Apple; I'm gonna send him the link to that page.

Watch them target HLP next. :nervous:
« Last Edit: October 13, 2003, 07:59:35 pm by 510 »
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Offline Rictor

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I couldn't be bothered to take screenshots an upload them, but while you're at it put up Habu the elephant and the Kanga-Jew:):)