Author Topic: How To Get Kicked Out Of Lotr  (Read 1688 times)

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Offline HotSnoJ

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How To Get Kicked Out Of Lotr
How to Get Kicked Out of "The Return of the King"

1. Stand up halfway through the movie and yell loudly, "Wait... where the hell is Harry Potter?"

2. Block the entrance to the theater while screaming: "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!" - After the movie, say "Lucas could have done it better."

3. Play a drinking game where you have to take a sip every time someone says: "The Ring."

4. Point and laugh whenever someone dies.

5. Ask everyone around you if they think Gandalf went to Hogwarts.

6. Finish off every one of Elrond's lines with "Mr. Anderson."

7. When Aragorn is crowned king, stand up and at the top of your lungs sing, "And I did it.... MY way...!"

8. Talk like Gollum all through the movie. At the end, bite off someone's finger and fall down the stairs.

9. Dress up as old ladies and reenact "The Battle of Helms Deep" Monty Python style.

10. When Denethor lights the fire, shout "Barbecue!"

11. In TTT when the Ents decide to march to war, stand up and shout "RUN FOREST, RUN!"

12. Every time someone kills an Orc, yell: "That's what I'm Tolkien about!"

13. During a wide shot of a battle, inquire, "Where's Waldo?"

14. Talk loudly about how you heard that there is a single frame of a nude Elf hidden somewhere in the movie.

15. Start an Orc sing-a-long.

16. Come to the premiere dressed as Frankenfurter and wander around looking terribly confused.

17. When they go in the paths of the dead, wait for tense moment and shout, "I see dead people!"

18. Imitate what you think a conversation between Gollum, Dobby and Yoda would be like.

19. Release a jar of daddy-long-legs into the theater during the Shelob scene.

20. Wonder out loud if Aragorn is going to run for governor of California.

21. When Shelob comes on, exclaim, "Man! Charlotte's really let herself go!

Where I found it
I have big plans, now if only I could see them through.

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Offline Flipside

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How To Get Kicked Out Of Lotr
ROFLMFAO!!!

Absolute Classic!

 

Offline Thorn

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Re: How To Get Kicked Out Of Lotr
Quote
Originally posted by HotSnoJ
How to Get Kicked Out of "The Return of the King"

1. Stand up halfway through the movie and yell loudly, "Wait... where the hell is Harry Potter?"
 

I like the Letterman version better.
"Where the hell is Chewbaca?"

 

Offline Stryke 9

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How To Get Kicked Out Of Lotr
Quote
12. Every time someone kills an Orc, yell: "That's what I'm Tolkien about!"


This would have kicked ass, only it'd require you to shout about once every .005 seconds.

Pity, really. I'd go to the theater just to do that, too.

 

Offline Woolie Wool

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How To Get Kicked Out Of Lotr
:lol:
16:46   Quanto   ****, a mosquito somehow managed to bite the side of my palm
16:46   Quanto   it itches like hell
16:46   Woolie   !8ball does Quanto have malaria
16:46   BotenAnna   Woolie: The outlook is good.
16:47   Quanto   D:

"did they use anesthetic when they removed your sense of humor or did you have to weep and struggle like a tiny baby"
--General Battuta

 

Offline Sandwich

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Re: Re: How To Get Kicked Out Of Lotr
Quote
Originally posted by Thorn

I like the Letterman version better.
"Where the hell is Chewbaca?"


I wanted to dress up as Chewie for ROTK, but I couldn't find a costume.
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"...The quintessential quality of our age is that of dreams coming true. Just think of it. For centuries we have dreamt of flying; recently we made that come true: we have always hankered for speed; now we have speeds greater than we can stand: we wanted to speak to far parts of the Earth; we can: we wanted to explore the sea bottom; we have: and so  on, and so on: and, too, we wanted the power to smash our enemies utterly; we have it. If we had truly wanted peace, we should have had that as well. But true peace has never been one of the genuine dreams - we have got little further than preaching against war in order to appease our consciences. The truly wishful dreams, the many-minded dreams are now irresistible - they become facts." - 'The Outward Urge' by John Wyndham

"The very essence of tolerance rests on the fact that we have to be intolerant of intolerance. Stretching right back to Kant, through the Frankfurt School and up to today, liberalism means that we can do anything we like as long as we don't hurt others. This means that if we are tolerant of others' intolerance - especially when that intolerance is a call for genocide - then all we are doing is allowing that intolerance to flourish, and allowing the violence that will spring from that intolerance to continue unabated." - Bren Carlill

 

Offline diamondgeezer

How To Get Kicked Out Of Lotr
If I was as clever as Zylon or Stryke I'd make a cutting remark about you looking like Chewbacca already

 

Offline Singh

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How To Get Kicked Out Of Lotr
ROFLMAO!!!!
:)

I thought simply yelling "LOTR SUCKS" would get you kicked? :)
"Blessed be the FREDder that knows his sexps."
"Cursed be the FREDder that trusts FRED2_Open."
Dreamed of much, accomplished little. :(

 

Offline Sandwich

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Quote
Originally posted by diamondgeezer
If I was as clever as Zylon or Stryke I'd make a cutting remark about you looking like Chewbacca already


In height? Hehe - why do you think I chose Chewie. ;)

...Or I could be Vader!

:nervous:
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"...The quintessential quality of our age is that of dreams coming true. Just think of it. For centuries we have dreamt of flying; recently we made that come true: we have always hankered for speed; now we have speeds greater than we can stand: we wanted to speak to far parts of the Earth; we can: we wanted to explore the sea bottom; we have: and so  on, and so on: and, too, we wanted the power to smash our enemies utterly; we have it. If we had truly wanted peace, we should have had that as well. But true peace has never been one of the genuine dreams - we have got little further than preaching against war in order to appease our consciences. The truly wishful dreams, the many-minded dreams are now irresistible - they become facts." - 'The Outward Urge' by John Wyndham

"The very essence of tolerance rests on the fact that we have to be intolerant of intolerance. Stretching right back to Kant, through the Frankfurt School and up to today, liberalism means that we can do anything we like as long as we don't hurt others. This means that if we are tolerant of others' intolerance - especially when that intolerance is a call for genocide - then all we are doing is allowing that intolerance to flourish, and allowing the violence that will spring from that intolerance to continue unabated." - Bren Carlill

 

Offline HotSnoJ

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How To Get Kicked Out Of Lotr
Quote
Originally posted by Singh
ROFLMAO!!!!
:)

I thought simply yelling "LOTR SUCKS" would get you kicked? :)
well if you thought that in the first place you wouldn't have gone to the movie at all. So ppl (if they were smart) would think you're either loco or are trying to joke.
I have big plans, now if only I could see them through.

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------------------------------
Nav buoy - They mark things

 

Offline karajorma

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How To Get Kicked Out Of Lotr
Quote
Originally posted by Singh
I thought simply yelling "LOTR SUCKS" would get you kicked? :)


The idea is to get kicked out. Not kicked to death :D
Karajorma's Freespace FAQ. It's almost like asking me yourself.

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Offline diamondgeezer

Re: How To Get Kicked Out Of Lotr
Quote
Originally posted by HotSnoJ
15. Start an Orc sing-a-long

*sings* It not easy, being green...

 

Offline Singh

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How To Get Kicked Out Of Lotr
Quote
Originally posted by karajorma


The idea is to get kicked out. Not kicked to death :D


hehe...true...
I guess making a Vader-like sound and then saying "Frodo...he's your father, damnit!!" May work?
"Blessed be the FREDder that knows his sexps."
"Cursed be the FREDder that trusts FRED2_Open."
Dreamed of much, accomplished little. :(

 

Offline an0n

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How To Get Kicked Out Of Lotr
Didn't Leia say something about having sex with a Wookie in New Hope?
"I.....don't.....CARE!!!!!" ---- an0n
"an0n's right. He's crazy, an asshole, not to be trusted, rarely to be taken seriously, and never to be allowed near your mother. But, he's got a knack for being right. In the worst possible way he can find." ---- Yuppygoat
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Offline karajorma

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How To Get Kicked Out Of Lotr
There was a list of Star Wars double entendres that mentioned some things that could be misconstrued that way.

I'm sure sooner or later someone will do one for Lord of the Rings.
Karajorma's Freespace FAQ. It's almost like asking me yourself.

[ Diaspora ] - [ Seeds Of Rebellion ] - [ Mind Games ]

 

Offline Sandwich

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Quote
Originally posted by an0n
Didn't Leia say something about having sex with a Wookie in New Hope?


It was "...kiss a Wookie!". Shows where your mind lies. ;)
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"...The quintessential quality of our age is that of dreams coming true. Just think of it. For centuries we have dreamt of flying; recently we made that come true: we have always hankered for speed; now we have speeds greater than we can stand: we wanted to speak to far parts of the Earth; we can: we wanted to explore the sea bottom; we have: and so  on, and so on: and, too, we wanted the power to smash our enemies utterly; we have it. If we had truly wanted peace, we should have had that as well. But true peace has never been one of the genuine dreams - we have got little further than preaching against war in order to appease our consciences. The truly wishful dreams, the many-minded dreams are now irresistible - they become facts." - 'The Outward Urge' by John Wyndham

"The very essence of tolerance rests on the fact that we have to be intolerant of intolerance. Stretching right back to Kant, through the Frankfurt School and up to today, liberalism means that we can do anything we like as long as we don't hurt others. This means that if we are tolerant of others' intolerance - especially when that intolerance is a call for genocide - then all we are doing is allowing that intolerance to flourish, and allowing the violence that will spring from that intolerance to continue unabated." - Bren Carlill

 

Offline an0n

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How To Get Kicked Out Of Lotr
Yes, right above my body.........next-to Leia, in a cell, aboard the Death Star 3........right behind the chains, the whips, 20 Imperial Troopers and the two floating holo-cams.
"I.....don't.....CARE!!!!!" ---- an0n
"an0n's right. He's crazy, an asshole, not to be trusted, rarely to be taken seriously, and never to be allowed near your mother. But, he's got a knack for being right. In the worst possible way he can find." ---- Yuppygoat
~-=~!@!~=-~ : Nodewar.com

 

Offline TrashMan

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How To Get Kicked Out Of Lotr
*CHUCKEL* CHUCKLE* CHUCKLE*

Gandalf: "Levictus hokius pokius dadaladum!"

Is that Excalibur Aragorn is wielding?

When the Eye of Sauron searches for Frodo (like the reflector), start imitating a prison siren
Nobody dies as a virgin - the life ****s us all!

You're a wrongularity from which no right can escape!

 

Offline Falcon

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How To Get Kicked Out Of Lotr
When Samwise is cooking yell "come and get it!" When Gollum is attacking Frodo on the end yell they should reall take their feelings for each other else where."
« Last Edit: January 04, 2004, 07:34:16 pm by 1408 »

 

Offline Martinus

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How To Get Kicked Out Of Lotr
[color=66ff00]Everytime you see the eye sing 'snake' at the top of your voice.

(for all the confused people; shame on you, go visit weebl's stuff right now and view the real version of the lord of the rings with all badger scenes reinserted.)
[/color]
Quote
11. In TTT when the Ents decide to march to war, stand up and shout "RUN FOREST, RUN!"

[color=66ff00]:lol: Good one.

Actually this reminds me of the second time my mate went to see Mortal Kombat in the cinema. He got a good laugh from the crowd after standing up, throwing up his arms and screaming 'horny wombat' at the intro.
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