Author Topic: Why I Love The Bible...  (Read 7652 times)

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Offline an0n

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Why I Love The Bible...
Aside from the story of Moses, which ranks right up there with LOTR, there are some kick-ass snippets, fables, tales and yarns in the Bible that just make it an absolute hoot to read (as a story):

I was browsing through the story of Sodom and Gommorah and thought this was worth a quote as a demonstration to all you Christo-hippies who think the Bible is all peace and love:

Quote
Originally posted by God - Genesis 19:4-5
Before they had gone to bed, all the men from every part of the city of Sodom-both young and old-surrounded the house. They called to Lot, "Where are the men who came to you tonight? Bring them out to us so that we can have sex with them."


It's from the New International Version and the King James version has it down as "So that we may know them" but I'm assuming the underlying Hebrew of the original (presumably) was the inspiration for this newest translation and the KJ Version was trying to appeal to a more demure demographic.

Homosexual gang-rape in the Bible though. Funny, eh?
« Last Edit: December 28, 2004, 06:55:03 pm by 397 »
"I.....don't.....CARE!!!!!" ---- an0n
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Yea, thats what happened back then.
Thats why god destroyed those cities. They were all horny gay faggots.

 

Offline an0n

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Actually, they were just greedy ****ers who ignored a few of the various edicts which God imposed upon the land.

The whole 'faggot' thing can be disputed through text analysis. There are very specific words for homosexuality and anti-God behaviour which are used many times in the Old Testament, but in the case of the story of Sodom and Gommorah the words used are very ambiguous, indicating that the unruly mob was unsure of who was in Lot's house (male or female) and that Lot was unsure of their intentions (the word used being very vague but generally leaning towards bad **** happening).

The whole gay-sex thing seems to stem from two point: Firstly, that they refused the offer of Lot's virgin daughters in exchange for leaving the 'visitors' alone. People assumed they were offered for sex and rejected by the gays, but it's more likely they were offered as sacrifices for Pagan rituals and rejected by the mob.

Secondly, the works of Philo (circa 50AD) in regards to the major points of Genesis alude to homosexuality being the cause for the destruction of the cities. Though he had no real proof upon which to make such a claim.
"I.....don't.....CARE!!!!!" ---- an0n
"an0n's right. He's crazy, an asshole, not to be trusted, rarely to be taken seriously, and never to be allowed near your mother. But, he's got a knack for being right. In the worst possible way he can find." ---- Yuppygoat
~-=~!@!~=-~ : Nodewar.com

 
This sort of **** has been happening over the past decade in general to the bible - being rewritten in vulgar, explicit modern day language in order to make it more accessible to the stupid. Score -1 to the Church, as usual

 
Well you know your bible stuff, An0n. I have heard of all of the stuff you mentioned above except how they wanted to sacrifice the daughters to the Pagan gods. Thats interesting, never heard that before.

I would have hated to be one of Lot's daughters then. lol

 

Offline Knight Templar

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If you were one of Lot's daughters, you'd have a rack.
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Offline Stealth

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EDIT:  i was confused with something else.  OK IIRC here's what happened:

In the culture at the time, if you took a guest into your house, you protected them with your life.  Now the visitors had come to warn Lot and his family that the cities (neighboring cities:  Sodom and Gomorrah) were going to be destroyed.  The city was infamous for its residents being homosexual and raping strangers.  When the mob demanded the visitors of Lot, he refused (see first sentence for reason) and offered up his daughters instead.  The crowd refused the daughters:  they wanted the visitors instead.  The visitors (angels) struck the mob with blindness.  The next day, the visitors led Lot and his family out of the city, and it was destroyed (here's the other tale, of Lot's wife, who looked back in hesitance and was turned to a pillar of salt).  the city was destroyed with fire and sulfur from heaven.

there you have it.
« Last Edit: December 28, 2004, 08:56:00 pm by 594 »

 

Offline an0n

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Nope.

Depending on which version you take to be true:

  • A rabble of men surrounded Lot's house and demanded that the strange men inside come out to be gang-raped. Lot offered his daughters up instead, but they rejected them.
  • A rabble of men surrounded Lot's house and demanded that the strange men come outside to get the **** beaten outta them and all their stuff stolen. Lot offered his daughter up for sex and/or sacrifice to prevent the Angels being attacked, but they rejected the offer.
  • A rabble went to Lot's house and demanded to see whom he had brought into the city. Lot offered his daughters as a sacrifice, but they rejected the offer.
Either way, the Angels dragged Lot back inside the house and blinded the rabble for their impudence. They gave Lot, his daughters and their husbands enough time to run to the nearby village of Zoar - then torched the entire plane.
"I.....don't.....CARE!!!!!" ---- an0n
"an0n's right. He's crazy, an asshole, not to be trusted, rarely to be taken seriously, and never to be allowed near your mother. But, he's got a knack for being right. In the worst possible way he can find." ---- Yuppygoat
~-=~!@!~=-~ : Nodewar.com

 

Offline Stealth

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yeah.  note that i edited it, and by the time i posted it, i saw the post you just made.  i was confusing the story with something else

 

Offline an0n

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You still are.

The city was more renouned for it's greed than for it's sexual deviancy. They had ****loads of fruit and gold dust to spare, but they built great cages around the trees so not even the birds could take their fruit and they turned over any foreigners for all they were worth.

And the Angel's didn't do **** to help Lot escape. It was basically a case of:

Angels: Go hide in the mountains.
Lot: The mountains?! They're ****ing miles away. I'll be toast before I can reach 'em!
Angels: Okay, then what the **** do you suggest?
Lot: Uh, how about Zoar?
Angels: Sure. **** it. Hurry up though, we need to smite this place before God gets pissed at us.
"I.....don't.....CARE!!!!!" ---- an0n
"an0n's right. He's crazy, an asshole, not to be trusted, rarely to be taken seriously, and never to be allowed near your mother. But, he's got a knack for being right. In the worst possible way he can find." ---- Yuppygoat
~-=~!@!~=-~ : Nodewar.com

 

Offline Stealth

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Quote
And the Angel's didn't do **** to help Lot escape. It was basically a case of:

Angels: Go hide in the mountains.
Lot: The mountains?! They're ****ing miles away. I'll be toast before I can reach 'em!
Angels: Okay, then what the **** do you suggest?
Lot: Uh, how about Zoar?
Angels: Sure. **** it. Hurry up though, we need to smite this place before God gets pissed at us.


i disagree.

Genesis 19:16
Quote
And while he lingered, the men ("men" being the angels, the visitors of Lot) laid hold upon his hand, and upon the hand of his wife, and upon the hand of his two daughters; the LORD being merciful unto him: and they brought him forth, and set him without the city.


(angels took lot and his family and led them outside the city... thereby helping them escape.)
« Last Edit: December 28, 2004, 09:31:23 pm by 594 »

 

Offline Nuke

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its funny the inconsistancys of various versions of the bible regaurding this particular fairytale.  any normal king james version says "so we may know them" but ive seen versions that replace the word 'know' with the word 'intercourse'. i blame this little typo on cristianity's unacceptance of homosexuals because it tends to be the first thing anti-gay christians seem to bring up. people fail to see the point that the bible is so old that the languages used have evolved to the point where words no longer mean the same thing,
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Offline an0n

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Yeah, they led them outta the city, but that's nothing considering the entire Jordan River Plane was gonna be incinerated.

Soon as they reached the edge of the city the Angels were all:

Quote
18 - But Lot said to them, "No, my lords, please!

19 - Your servant has found favor in your eyes, and you have shown great kindness to me in sparing my life. But I can't flee to the mountains; this disaster will overtake me, and I'll die.

20 - Look, here is a town near enough to run to, and it is small. Let me flee to it-it is very small, isn't it? Then my life will be spared."

21 - He said to him, "Very well, I will grant this request too; I will not overthrow the town you speak of.

22 - But flee there quickly, because I cannot do anything until you reach it."
"I.....don't.....CARE!!!!!" ---- an0n
"an0n's right. He's crazy, an asshole, not to be trusted, rarely to be taken seriously, and never to be allowed near your mother. But, he's got a knack for being right. In the worst possible way he can find." ---- Yuppygoat
~-=~!@!~=-~ : Nodewar.com

  

Offline Stealth

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Quote
The Jude passage mentioned earlier cites "fornication" and "going after strange flesh." The Genesis passages (ch. 18 & 19) mention the citizens wanting to molest visitors, then turning on Lot who was keeping the visitors safe. Jeremiah also seems to mention sexual sin (23:14) along with lying and "strengthen[ing] the hands of evil doers." The most detailed list of Sodom's sin is found in Ezekiel 16:49 (if indeed it is not speaking figuratively of another city); "pride" and "prosperous ease" head the list, followed by the converse of Jeremiah's complaint, they "do not strengthen the hand of the poor and needy," and finally, stating that they were "haughty" and "committed abomination before God." The magnitude of Sodom's sin is also mentioned throughout the Bible as "great and grievous" (Gen.18:20), so pervasive that Abraham doubted that there were even 20 righteous people in it (Gen. 18:32), and that they acted without shame, openly displaying their sin, not hiding it (Isa.3:9).



so yeah, an0n, i guess it was for both.

 

Offline Stealth

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Quote
Originally posted by an0n
Yeah, they led them outta the city, but that's nothing considering the entire Jordan River Plane was gonna be incinerated.

Soon as they reached the edge of the city the Angels were all:

 


... note what i originally said:

Quote
The next day, the visitors led Lot and his family out of the city


i never said the angels led them out of the country or anything... simply that they were led out of the city.  which they were :)

 

Offline an0n

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Basically - the people of Sodom were total ****-ups.
"I.....don't.....CARE!!!!!" ---- an0n
"an0n's right. He's crazy, an asshole, not to be trusted, rarely to be taken seriously, and never to be allowed near your mother. But, he's got a knack for being right. In the worst possible way he can find." ---- Yuppygoat
~-=~!@!~=-~ : Nodewar.com

 

Offline Stealth

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roger

 

Offline Kamikaze

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Angels are genderless. It seems a bit strange that the crowd would want them for sex if they don't really look like men/women.
Science alone of all the subjects contains within itself the lesson of the danger of belief in the infallibility of the greatest teachers in the preceding generation . . .Learn from science that you must doubt the experts. As a matter of fact, I can also define science another way: Science is the belief in the ignorance of experts. - Richard Feynman

 

Offline Stealth

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because they weren't shimmery, half see-through spirits with halos around their heads holding harps... they were sent in the bodies of men.

if they were in their spirit forms, i'm pretty sure instead of wanting to rape them, the mob would've been scared ****less...

 
The only real thing we can be sure is that Sodom and Gomorrah were supposed to be very wicked.  Most of the other perceptions are either drawn from context or inferred from secondary references to the event.


In any case, what was the point of this again?


[edit] And yes, when an attempt is made to make an accurate translation, some of the stuff in the Bible is rather surprising [/edit]