I know how cool the concept of single-handedly taking out a Sathanas's main beam cannons is, but to me, "Bearbaiting" is single-handedly the most frustrating mission of the FS2 main campaign. (Second would definitely be the first SOC mission, where you have to defend the Iceni and that science ship, and third would be the infamous Proving Grounds, featuring the Tiamat, everyone's favorite Moloch.) Let me just put it this way: I've just replayed that mission about 25 times in a row, and every time, either myself or my wingmen, or just the game's physics engine in general, has managed to completely **** up.
All right, so you have two wings of bombers and one wing of fighters at your disposal, plus a wing of reinforcements. That all seems well and good, until you realize that not a single one of these ships will do anything useful. Case in point: I ordered every single one of those ships to cover me and to ignore the Sathanas, and about 30 seconds later, I had two Basilisks bearing down on me. I have absolutely no idea where my wingmen were, but I know they weren't covering me. I've ordered all of them to destroy the two main flak guns that represent the secondary objective and prove to be such a royal pain in the *** while attempting to destroy the turrets, but lo and behold, neither one gets anywhere close to 50% integrity. Don't even bother telling them to attack a beam cannon; that ain't happening. In fact, all they're good for in that mission is as a preoccupation for the Shivan fighters, and when they get bored with them, they start coming after you.
Now let's look at the actual bombing run. You can't vary your loadout at all for some strange reason, so you can't carry more than 4 Helios torpedoes, making rearming during the course of a mission a necessity. For your actual bombing technique, you'll have to fly at a precise angle toward each wing, blast your afterburners, and release both Helios bombs at the precise moment. Otherwise, you'll end up at a turret with 5%, 15%, or my personal favorite, an astounding 55% integrity left over. (I'm not kidding, but during one attempt, both torpedoes completely missed the arm, leaving me with a fully healthy turret and no chance of victory.) The Helios torpedoes are the most powerful weapons in the game; no turret, however well-armored, should be able to withstand a pari of them going off within 30 meters of it. Plus, as I'd like to point out, the turrets are located at the thinnest point of those gigantic arms, which by any definition of engineering should be the weakest point on the whole vessel. Not in this mission, though.
Meanwhile, those aforementioned uber-flak guns are pounding away at your hull, wearing down your shields. Since full power to engines is a requisite for moving around fast enough, this quickly becomes a problem, especially if you're being attacked by fighters at the same time. Now suppose you did manage to destroy the beam with one salvo, or with a quick pair of trebuchets if you were lucky enough to get off with 5% left. Now, you have to turn around, haul *** away from the Sathanas while it's in motion, and position yourself for another run. Oh, did I mention the fact that the Helios's absurdly slow lock time, coupled with that flak, make it damn-near impossible to attain aspect lock? All right, so you have two cannons down; now you need to rearm in the midst of the flak, while being shot at by enemy fighters. Now you have to do the whole thing twice again, and by your last run, you'll literally have seconds to spare and absolutely no margin for error. Nothing like doing the first three turrets perfectly, only to have your Helioses **** up on the last one.
Oh, I left out the one mistake that's my favorite of all: forgetting to switch from the Helios to the Trebuchet after rearming or at the start of the mission. There's nothing like doing that perfect run-up toward the cannon, letting your payload go, only to see two dinky missiles impacting with the turret and taking it down 5%. Yeah, that'll just make my day so much more fulfilling.
All right, so you've managed to finally get all four turrets down. Now, all you have to do is manage to avoid the absolutely massive capital ship that's about to jump out right on top of you. You can forget about those flak turrets; you'd need another two minutes at least to take care of them, and that's with the help of your incompetent wingmates, God knows where they ran off to. (Unbelievably, my wingmates once managed to take down these turrets by themselves; I still have no idea how or why. Of course, managing to take advantage of such a gift, I promptly misfired my Helioses and ruined my chances for that attempt.) As for that back bonus beam turret, I've never even so much as seen it during the mission, and with the time required to move down the whole length of the largest ship in the game, the odds of getting that one approach infinity to one.
So, you've managed to destroy the beam turrets and dodge the Sathanas. You'd think that this would be the end of it. But no, now you have to protect a puny Sobek that chooses to go mano a mano with a newly-arrived Demon. You're now supposed to take out three turrets on the Demon (at least they aren't as well-armed as the uber-guns of the Sathanas), one of which begins firing at the Sobek as soon as it arrives. If you don't kill that turret within the time frame of its first three shots, there goes the Sobek, which does absolutely nothing in the realm of fighting back against the Demon. Oh, I forgot to mention: you're already damaged from fighting the Sathanas, and you'll need to rearm yet again before taking it on. Also, you only have a limited time frame to take out this Demon; don't get it done in time, and you automatically fail the mission. Just today, I got the thing down to 2%, then it jumped without warning; despite the fact that I could take it down with one shot in the next mission and that it would provide absolutely no threat against the Colossus, and also despite the fact that I had done a 4/4 on the Sathanas, the oh-so-wise Command declared this whole thing a "failure." High standards, anyone? Finally, provided you've managed to take out both the turrets and the Demon, make sure not to jump before taking out every remaining fighter. Somehow, leaving one damaged Basilisk behind also constitutes as a failure. Thanks a lot, Command.
As you can tell, this mission has pissed me off to no end, and I needed a way to blow off some steam. I'm sure there's more than one of you that will agree with me: this mission's design blows chunks. I think that's why the next mission, High Noon, where you get to sit back and watch the Big C blow the ever-lovin' crap out of the Sathanas, was made to be so easy: the [V] boys knew that we had all given ourselves coronaries after attempting the previous mission. Anyway, I hope this has provided something of an amusement, and if you're reading this anytime soon, I'll probably still be getting pissed off at this paragon of frustrating game moments.