It may be a good idea to make the player wait for the wing that arrives, maybe do this by increasing the time it takes to scan..not sure how you would do this. So far nothing seems to have gone horribly wrong, my only realy gripe is that the mission is not very challenging, the player gets 10 other fighters, don't be afraid to swarm the player a little bit. Also the comms msg telling the player to stay away from the Centari cruiser does seem a bit odd as my wing had no probs killing it several times. Still for a first draft it is very impressive.
Also, what ambience is recommended?