[Fineus]

I've always considered myself to be a fairly shy person. I'm happy to talk to people I know but less inclined to start talking to strangers without worrying about what to say.

That said, I never imagined there was something actually clinically wrong. I figured I just had a shy streak.

My point is... where does shyness end and things like Social Anxiety Disorder kick in? Surely knowing you have that disorder would cause a further loss in confidence as you'd then be worried that you were different from everyone else as well... rather than just being shy. Or is this disorder something that was invented to make shy people feel better?

This one has me a bit confused. It's not exactly important right now, but I wouldn't mind knowing what people think.

[Descenterace]

It's typical of society today to label anything more than 2 Standard Deviations from the mean as a 'disorder'.

People are different. It's that simple.

[Primus]

Social Anxiety Disorder... My friend has it and eats medication for it. Without them, he has very hard time to be among strange people. He can go to shop, walk in downtown, take a ride in bus and so on. But he can't handle meetings like army draft, etc.

I hope you get the picture what I'm trying to explain, language barrier, you know.

Oh, I'm also happy to talk to people I know but rarely know what to say to strangers. I'm shy, but there's more than that...

[castor]

Originally posted by Descenterace
It's typical of society today to label anything more than 2 Standard Deviations from the mean as a 'disorder'.

People are different. It's that simple.

[Nuke]

some would discribe me as shy but i typically avoid people because of profound hatred for them. i have no problem talking to people i know or have an intrest in. and i have no problem chatting with people who pass by me at work but frankly id rather talk to my cats, or the voices in my head. they certainly have more to say.

[Rictor]

Originally posted by Kalfireth
That said, I never imagined there was something actually clinically wrong. I figured I just had a shy streak.

And you were right. There are very few people who would free of some Debilitating Behavioural Disorder, when put to the microscope, on account of the incredible number of so-called disorders and their broad, vague description. This is a clever ploy by the psycho-analytical industry, and it is an industry, to widen their client base from genuinely crazy people to include bored housewives, rebellious teenagers and in fact anyone who fails to walk around with a smile twenty-four hours a day.

As long as any given behaviour is not seriously affecting your everyday life (as in, you're afraid to go to the store in case someone accidentally brushes up against you) my advice would be to write it off as normal human imperfection. Personally, and I mean no offence, I think that society is just bored lately, so they start playing a little game called "Cure me Doctor, oh cure me". I mean, people managed for tens of thousands of years without any such thing as "mental health", and life was much harder: massacre after famine after plauge, and you were dead by 30.

This may make me seem like an uncaring prick, but I'm really just a skeptic.

[delta_7890]

Agreed with Rictor.  I'm a rather shy person myself.  Never engage in coversations unless I'm familiar with the person, or feeling especially brave.  Which is rare.  But if someone talks to me, I'm usually very friendly.

So long as it's not interfering with your everyday life, shouldn't be a problem.

[Fineus]

Not really.. I was rather hoping that's the way it'd go.

Generally I don't have time for social disorders and I couldn't ever imagine being frightened of going shopping for fear of talking to the checkout clerk. However after a prolonged bout of feeling rather shut in and having not spoken to many people (which is as much my own laziness when it came to going anywhere as anything else).. I felt a bit  out of sorts.

That said, I can cope with the notion of being shy far more easily than having something as important sounding as an actual disorder.

[wolfdog]

Hm, well, I am one of the people who have the 'privilege' to label themselves as having a "Social Anxiety Disorder".
(or at least, I think so, but the term we use here would be more accurately translated to "Social Skill Disorder")

It came with something  called PDDNOS*, and it's quite annoying sometimes, although it has it's advantages.
It goes as far as that I sometimes don't even dare to ask my parents for, let's say, the peanut butter on the other side of the table.
Calling or mailing people is also pretty much out of the question. If  I am somehow forced to call, mail or ask something to someone, I usually simply "block" (don't hear, see, feel or move and ignore everything) but in extreme cases, I might black out(as in fainting) or lose control (start crying and such) the last two are useually followed by several restless nights. (and the resulting bad temper )
 
I think it's pretty ignorant to say something like that isn't a disorder, but if you're only a bit shy... Well, in that case I agree with most posters above me.


*Pervasive Developmental Disorder not otherwise Specified

[Nuke]

i probibly got hal the disorders on the board, but i dont play the pop some pills and see a shrink game, because i know its bull****, and i dont have insurance. and i really dont care anyway.

[SadisticSid]

I seem to have a problem interacting with a group of people (not friends, that's fine) but when it's just me and someone else, it's quite easy. Then again I think most of what I like talking about wouldn't interest other people in a casual context, and I'm not one for silly anecdotes, so there's probably a logical rather than psychological reason why. Descenterace put it perfectly.

[Ghostavo]

Originally posted by SadisticSid
I seem to have a problem interacting with a group of people (not friends, that's fine) but when it's just me and someone else, it's quite easy. Then again I think most of what I like talking about wouldn't interest other people in a casual context, and I'm not one for silly anecdotes, so there's probably a logical rather than psychological reason why. Descenterace put it perfectly.

[IceFire]

I think the question should be out forward as: Does your shyness impede your normal day to day operations so much as so you plan your day around avoiding people that you may or may not know?

If you do plan your day to avoid people as much as possible all the time for fear of socializing with them then I'd say you have a problem that may require some sort of medical involvement (not necessarily drugs either).  But if not, then you are fairly normal.

I go between being somewhat of a shy person to wanting everyones attention.  Doesn't make much sense and I never could figure it out but there are times when I want to just be a part of the background and sometimes I want to make sure all eyes are on me.  I think I'm ok for the most part

[Fineus]

I also like to think I'm ok I certainly don't plan my day around involving others. But if it comes to public speaking or meeting someone new then I feel my social skills are somewhat lacking and I really can't think of how to go about changing that.

[WMCoolmon]

Bah. Sounds totally normal, unless 95% of the people I see on a daily basis are elitist *******s who think they're too good for me.

If you see yourself as not having developed the skills to go up to people and start a convo out of thin air (or the weather, or sports, etc), it's probably just that.

[Sandwich]

I used to be the shyest (is that even a word?) person around. Then one day I decided that there was no point in being shy. Even better - I discovered that drawing the attention of others around you to the mistakes you make, and making fun of said mistakes yourself, not only drastically lessens any negative social impact of those mistakes, but gives the people around you the feeling that you must be a confident person to be able to make fun of yourself in public like that.

Still, I don't particularly enjoy introducing myself to someone new... but that's often because I'm sick and tired of meeting someone, only to find out that they're only visiting Jerusalem for a week (i.e. there's not much point in investing in getting to know them).

I tell you what, though, once you take the first few steps that diametrically oppose your natural shyness, it gets easier and easier (as you build up confidence).

[Kazan]

Sandwich's solution there is a good one

[Nuke]

id have to disagree, i stopped being shy ahile back, after awhile i grew to hate people more. so now im pretty much just a crazy shut-in.

[Ford Prefect]

My main social handicap is that I really don't like being drunk.

[Taristin]

Originally posted by Ford Prefect
My main social handicap is that I really don't like being drunk.

Ah. I don't mind being drunk, but the process of getting there is annoying. And yea, it is a little restricting on the social life when you don't drink often...