Very nice stuff here, but I have to indulge in some nitpicking here. Hang on a sec...
DISCLAIMER: EXAMINING/SEEING/READING THE NITPICKING MODE MAY INDUCE SOME ANNOYANCE OF THE ARROGANT TONE OF THE NITPICKING. IF ARROGANT NITPICKING OFFENDS YOU, PLEASE READ NO FARTHER. IF ARROGANT NITPICKING DOES NOT BOTHER YOU (MUCH), THEN PLEASE PROCEED. SU-TEHP (AND BY EXTENSION, FREDZone) CANNOT BE HELD RESPONISBLE FOR ANY BRUISED EGOS THAT MAY RESULT FROM THIS NITPICKING.
*engaging FS Story Nitpicking mode*
Ahem, according to the original FS2 campaign, the 4th Fleet is located in Vega, not Beta Aquilae. I have extrapolated that it is actually the 5th Fleet that is located in Beta Aquilae, although this piece of information has not been independently confirmed by
. I have made a list of GTVA (Terran and Vasudan) and NTF fleet organization, which can be found on the FREDZone forum here:
http://pub11.ezboard.com/fjtofrm11.showMessage?topicID=23.topic Of course, you are not bound to using this list (nor do I have any method of coercing you to use this list
), but I would not mind in the least if you did.
Furthermore, the "Welcome to the Independence" phrasing does have some grammatical errors (missing commas, run-on sentence, etc.). Perhaps, a better phrasing would be as follows:
"Pilot, welcome to the GTCa Independence, flagship of the Beta Aquilae fleet."
*disengaging FS Story Nitpicking mode*
I hope my nitpicking didn't offend too many people.
BTW, that animation of the Warlock carrier, is that just one frame or does it have several frames? ('Cause if it has many frames and has the Warlock move, I can't wait to see it for myself!
)
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FRED Zone's Grammar editor/ FS history moderator
Former member of TCA
Member in good standing of 99th Skulls
Honorary member of TCS and UGC
"I created your civilization...now I will destroy it!"
--Ra, the Sun God