Author Topic: Movie adaptations: why do they suck?  (Read 10526 times)

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Offline Galemp

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Movie adaptations: why do they suck?
Tomatometer ratings for the past fifteen years.

Max Payne: 18%
Hitman: 15%
Postal: 8%
Dungeon Siege: 4%
Dead or Alive: 35%
Silent Hill: 30%
Bloodrayne: 4%
Doom: 20%
Alone in the Dark: 1%
Resident Evil: 34%
Tomb Raider: 19%
Final Fantasy: 44%
Wing Commander: 9%
Street Fighter: 27%
Mortal Kombat: 24%
Super Mario Bros: 6%

Discuss.
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Offline Stormkeeper

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Re: Movie adaptations: why do they suck?
I guess its because you can't get the feeling of dodging missiles and lasers across in the silver screen easily.
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Offline Mongoose

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Re: Movie adaptations: why do they suck?
Hey, Street Fighter was awesome. :nervous:

 

Offline BloodEagle

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Re: Movie adaptations: why do they suck?
Hey, Street Fighter was awesome. :nervous:

I assume that you're talking about the live action movie. And I disagree.

 

Offline Stormkeeper

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Re: Movie adaptations: why do they suck?
Hey, Street Fighter was awesome. :nervous:

I assume that you're talking about the live action movie. And I disagree.
So do I. Most vehemently, but most civilly. It was epic in terms of failure, in my opinion.
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Re: Movie adaptations: why do they suck?
I'm surprised that Max Payne is currently holding out at number one at the box office right now :wtf:. As far as I'm concerned, we should :warp: the people who try to make video game movies. Unless someone revives the Halo movie w/out making it suck :doubt:...

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"Take my love. Take my land. Take me where I cannot stand. I don't care, I'm still free. You can't take the sky from me. Take me out to the black, tell them I ain't comin' back. Burn the land boil the sea, you can't take the sky from me. There's no place I can be since I've found Serenity. But you can't take the sky from me." - Ballad of Serenity

 

Offline Mongoose

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Re: Movie adaptations: why do they suck?
Jean Claude van Damme trying and failing to fake an American accent, and one of the greatest speeches in movie history.  What more do you need?

 

Offline Stormkeeper

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Re: Movie adaptations: why do they suck?
I've yet to see a movie adaptation that is really successful, unless you wanna count Final Fantasy Advent Childer, which was more like a sequel.
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Re: Movie adaptations: why do they suck?
Jean Claude van Damme trying and failing to fake an American accent, and one of the greatest speeches in movie history.  What more do you need?

The best American accent that I've heard is Hugh Laurie as House. A little shaky in the first few episodes, but by the fifth episode he hits it perfect and keeps it up.

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"Take my love. Take my land. Take me where I cannot stand. I don't care, I'm still free. You can't take the sky from me. Take me out to the black, tell them I ain't comin' back. Burn the land boil the sea, you can't take the sky from me. There's no place I can be since I've found Serenity. But you can't take the sky from me." - Ballad of Serenity

 

Offline Vidmaster

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Re: Movie adaptations: why do they suck?
why they always suck? because none has made a good one.

Big exception is the new Max Payne. Hopefully, this one sets a new trend.
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Offline Galemp

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Re: Movie adaptations: why do they suck?
Big exception is the new Max Payne. Hopefully, this one sets a new trend.

Critics say otherwise. Personally, I'm devastated. Max Payne is one of the most cinematic games I've ever played, and it perfectly straddles the line between being a spoof of the Detective Noir genre and being a shining example of it. I wanted a loving treatment of the source material.

Of course I haven't seen it yet...
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Offline Vidmaster

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Re: Movie adaptations: why do they suck?
I liked it. Basta.

If sb expects just the game's story without the gameplay, there would be no reason to actually make a movie.  ;)
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Re: Movie adaptations: why do they suck?
Meh, personally I liked Doom and Mortal Kombat, and Silent Hill wasn't that bad either (though clearly born from a videogame). Not saying they were great movies, but they were okay.

As for other video game movies, who knows. Maybe because all the directors are no names?
Or why do Book adaptations suck for the most part? Thing is, both books and video games are stories with lengths that are much greater than simply 2 hours. So how does one shrink that much story, into that small of time and still maintaining the broad appeal? Or maybe that's the thing. People make these movies for people who played the video games, but the movie should be able to stand on its own.

I mean for Hitman, the actor quite honestly looked stupid. If they had Jason Statham in there instead, I might have considered seeing it, but not that dumb looking guy. Of course Statham also did another movie on your list, in the Name of the King, which by all accounts was a huge pile of ****.

 

Offline Jeff Vader

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Re: Movie adaptations: why do they suck?
Meh, personally I liked Doom and Mortal Kombat,
Mortal Kombat was okay. But Mortal Kombat: Annihilation was something that successfully both sucked and blew, effectively deterring me from the rest of the films of the franchise.
23:40 < achillion > EveningTea: ass
23:40 < achillion > wait no
23:40 < achillion > evilbagel: ass
23:40 < EveningTea > ?
23:40 < achillion > 2-letter tab complete failure

14:08 < achillion > there's too much talk of butts and dongs in here
14:08 < achillion > the level of discourse has really plummeted
14:08 < achillion > Let's talk about politics instead
14:08 <@The_E > butts and dongs are part of #hard-light's brand now
14:08 <@The_E > well
14:08 <@The_E > EvilBagel's brand, at least

01:06 < T-Rog > welp
01:07 < T-Rog > I've got to take some very strong antibiotics
01:07 < achillion > penis infection?
01:08 < T-Rog > Chlamydia
01:08 < achillion > O.o
01:09 < achillion > well
01:09 < achillion > I guess that happens
01:09 < T-Rog > at least it's curable
01:09 < achillion > yeah
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Offline Mongoose

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Re: Movie adaptations: why do they suck?
Mortal Kombat was okay. But Mortal Kombat: Annihilation was something that successfully both sucked and blew, effectively deterring me from the rest of the films of the franchise.
I've never seen the original, but I've somehow wound up sitting through that sequel multiple times.  Basic cable, how I loathe thee...

 

Offline TrashMan

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Re: Movie adaptations: why do they suck?
Meh, personally I liked Doom and Mortal Kombat, and Silent Hill wasn't that bad either (though clearly born from a videogame). Not saying they were great movies, but they were okay.

Agreed.
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Offline IceFire

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Re: Movie adaptations: why do they suck?
Wow Wing Commander takes a beating there...it wasn't that bad.  It had some stupid moments but it had some style and the CGI was really good for the time. Its still pretty good.

Most of the people who do the movies don't get it.  People want to see a good movie based on the story of the video game.  They don't want to play the video game while watching the movie.  If they wanted to do that they could play the video game.

Actually the best game to movie adaptation (I haven't seen Max Payne yet) I've seen is Final Fantasy.  Not everyone liked it but I thought it was a good movie.  The animation style was ambitious and difficult at the time...but they laid allot of groundwork. And the story was pretty decent too.  That one was about the story really...not about the video game.  But then the Final Fantasy games are just so different than your normal shooter.
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Re: Movie adaptations: why do they suck?
Meh, personally I liked Doom and Mortal Kombat,
Mortal Kombat was okay. But Mortal Kombat: Annihilation was something that successfully both sucked and blew, effectively deterring me from the rest of the films of the franchise.

   Oh, Annihilation was a complete piece of crap "ANIMALITY!!!!"
   As for Street Fighter, I haven't seen the live action one, but the japanese animation of the same name is worth a watch. A lot of the dialogue is horrid, but a lot of the fights are pretty damn good (Chun Li vs Vega).

 
Re: Movie adaptations: why do they suck?
Is that Final Fantasy: Spirits Within or Advent Children?  Calling the former an adaptation is....well, probably incorrect.


Anyway, really, it comes down to 4 things: 
1: People want to make movies of popular games.  Nobody is dying to make DaiKatana the movie.
2: Popular games almost always follow a pattern that sticks them firmly in action or horror genres.  Schindler's List: The Arcade Game ain't breaking sales records.
3: Generally speaking, most action and horror movies suck.
4: Since there's a pretty good chance the movie will suck even with talent behind it, and it will still make money even if it sucks, why bother trying for more then 'sucks'?

 

Offline NGTM-1R

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Re: Movie adaptations: why do they suck?
Time.

How long did it take you to play through Bioshock? Wolfenstein (the original one)? Duke3D? Doom? And let's not even touch anything turn-based or RTS, which can last for days.

There's your answer. They don't compress.
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