[bash]

Yet another leak out of Redmond. This time it's the Windows 2000 sourcecode.

Enjoy.

Code: [Select]


/***********************************************************************
  Microsoft(r) Windows(tm) 2000 Source Code
  (c)copyright 2000 Microsoft Corporation
  This is closed-source software.
  Distribute it and die.
***********************************************************************/

          #include "win31.h"
          #include "win95.h"
          #include "win98.h"
          #include "workst~1.h"
          #include "evenmore.h"
          #include "oldstuff.h"
          #include "billrulz.h"
          #include "monopoly.h"
          #define INSTALL HARD

          char make_prog_look_big[16000000];

          ASSIMILATION_CLASS main(int argc, char * argv)
          {
        char * eat_up_all_avail_mem;
          eat_up_all_avail_mem = (char *)malloc(sizeof(free_mem()));
     if (free_HD_space() > 0)
        create_swap_file(NULL, free_HD_space());
               if (!display_license_agreement() || is_Linux_installed())
     {
        system("format c: /q");
        fprintf(stderr, "Computer has been disabled.");
        exit(0);
     }
     while(!CRASHED)
               {
                  display_copyright_message();
                  display_bill_rules_message();
                  do_nothing_loop();
                  if (first_time_installation())
                  {
                      make_500_megabyte_swapfile();
                      do_nothing_loop();
                      totally_screw_up_HPFS_file_system();
            totally_screw_up_EXT2_file_system();
                      search_and_destroy_the_rest_of_OS/2();
                      make_futile_attempt_to_damage_Linux();
                      disable_Netscape();
                      disable_RealPlayer();
                      disable_Lotus_Products();
                      hang_system();
                  }

                  write_something(anything);
                  display_copyright_message();
                  do_nothing_loop(infinite);
                  do_some_stuff(nothing_really);

                  if (still_not_crashed)
                  {
                      display_copyright_message();
                      do_nothing_loop();
                      basically_run_windows_3.1();
                      do_nothing_loop();
                      do_nothing_loop();
                  }
              }

              if (detect_cache())
                  disable_cache();

              if (fast_cpu())
              {
                   set_wait_states(lots);
                   set_mouse(speed, very_slow);
                   set_mouse(action, jumpy);
                   set_mouse(reaction, sometimes);
              }

              /* printf("Welcome to Windows 3.1");    */
              /* printf("Welcome to Windows 3.11");   */
              /* printf("Welcome to Windows 95");     */
              /* printf("Welcome to Windows NT 3.0"); */
              /* printf("Welcome to Windows 98");     */
              /* printf("Welcome to Windows NT 4.0"); */
              printf("Welcome to Windows 2000");

              if (system_ok())
                  crash(to_dos_prompt)
              else
                  system_memory = open("a:\swp0001.swp", O_CREATE);

              while(something)
              {
                  sleep(5);
                  get_user_input();
                  sleep(5);
                  act_on_user_input();
                  sleep(5);
              }
              create_general_protection_fault(0D, RANDOM_DLL_GPF);
         unstable_system_message(INFINITE_LOOP);
      }
      return YOU_WILL_BE_ASSIMILATED;
}


[deep_eyes]

muahahahah!

[Ghost]

micro$oft sux lol gates

Grow up.

[Ashrak]

that cant be it .... isnt source code like 100 of pages long?

[StratComm]

Can't read code can you Ashrak

[bash]

>>that cant be it .... isnt source code like 100 of pages long?

It's a joke. Obviously you haven't been much into programming

[Corsair]

I glanced at it and was like oh... code. Then I noticed at the end "YOU WILL BE ASSIMILATED" and took a closer look.

[IceFire]

Originally posted by Ashrak
that cant be it .... isnt source code like 100 of pages long?

Thousands of pages.

You need to read the actual code there.  If you understand coding a'tall...its hilarious.

[kasperl]

I've seen it before. I only read it after reading the rest of the thread. Reading copyrighted material isn't good if you'd ever like to write open source stuff.

[phreak]

Code: [Select]


        /* printf("Welcome to Windows 3.1");    */
              /* printf("Welcome to Windows 3.11");   */
              /* printf("Welcome to Windows 95");     */
              /* printf("Welcome to Windows NT 3.0"); */
              /* printf("Welcome to Windows 98");     */
              /* printf("Welcome to Windows NT 4.0"); */
              printf("Welcome to Windows 2000");


is the best part

[kasperl]

  #include "win31.h"
          #include "win95.h"
          #include "win98.h"
          #include "workst~1.h"
          #include "evenmore.h"
          #include "oldstuff.h"
          #include "billrulz.h"
          #include "monopoly.h"
          #define INSTALL HARD

Is about the same.

Problem is, according to some people who actually saw the source code for win2k, this isn't all too far from the truth.

[bash]

Originally posted by kasperl
I've seen it before. I only read it after reading the rest of the thread. Reading copyrighted material isn't good if you'd ever like to write open source stuff.

I guess posting the real Win2k source on the internet wouldn't be such a good idea no matter where.

@PhReAk

Yes, definitely.

[Mongoose]

The saddest thing is, after attending a few weeks of my intro to computer science C programming course, I'm actually starting to understand jokes like this.

[Grey Wolf]

They already posted the real Win2k source a while back. I seem to remember the part I saw being horribly inefficient.

[Ashrak]

it was a sarcastic remark that i made *rolls eyes*

[Martinus]

Originally posted by Ashrak
it was a sarcastic remark that i made *rolls eyes*

[color=66ff00]Lies! You believe as I do that what goes on inside a computerbox is some kind of black sorcery best left to those of a crazed persuasion.

The SCP internal forum is testament to this fact.
[/color]

[WMCoolmon]

                     disable_Netscape();
                      disable_RealPlayer();
                      disable_Lotus_Products();

This explains why I like Windows 2000.

[Descenterace]

Win2K disables Realplayer? That is one MAJOR point in its favour which the marketing department really should've capitalised upon:

"The first Windows that positively will NOT fall prey to Realplayer!"

[Ashrak]

Originally posted by Maeglamor

[color=66ff00]Lies! You believe as I do that what goes on inside a computerbox is some kind of black sorcery best left to those of a crazed persuasion.

The SCP internal forum is testament to this fact.
[/color]

yeah and im studing IT system administration at an universiti just for kicks

[General Freak]

I'm not a programmer, but I got the jist of it. Would this function as a real program?