[iamzack]

I only date nerds. Nerd girls are even worse with the sex drive thing than nerd guys. Nerd guys at least have the decency to be like "hmm.. I should want sex more." Nerd girls are like "Sex? Why? I have better things to do. Like homework."

[watsisname]

Nerd girls tend to like the kinky sex more, though.

[Flipside]

Trying to figure out how to respond to this thread without sounding like a condescending old person...

Sex plays an important role in a relationship, but a relationship cannot be sustained by sex alone, that's not a relationship, it's what the Americans so wonderfully call a '****-buddy', blunt, but refreshingly accurate. The problem is, and I was just as guilty a decade ago, sex tends to eclipse everything else because it is such a powerful experience.

[mxlm]

Raleigh isn't interesting places.

Except for the university campus, surely?

My sister and her friends didn't seem bored when I visited her a year or two back.

[NGTM-1R]

Raleigh is boring, sure, but it's not that boring.

[Nuclear1]

Raleigh is boring, sure, but it's not that boring.

As someone who lived there for two years, yes, it is that boring.

[iamzack]

Extremely boring. We don't even have amusement parks. The nearest one is a water park an hour away. Le sigh.

[IceFire]

Well, I pity Trumbar, whoever that is then

Pity Trumby? I'm the one who's gone without for two weeks straight. >.<

My heart weeps for you.  Two weeks is such a long time compared to 17 years

Umm, got you beat, with  2 decades going on never.

With that kind of attitude it's going to continue.  Small steps towards life goals.... small steps.

[Liberator]

With that kind of attitude it's going to continue.  Small steps towards life goals.... small steps.

This kind of attitude is borne of that same 20 years of perceiving the opposition to have anything from apathy to active dislike to outright derision.  I've given up because I don't have anything to offer a potential mate. 

[iamzack]

Erh, it might help if you didn't perceive 50% of the people on earth as "the opposition."

[General Battuta]

Yeah. Women aren't sexual gatekeepers; men don't throw themselves out there for approval.

[Colonol Dekker]

No i throw myself out there to get my rocks off.

[Liberator]

Yeah. Women aren't sexual gatekeepers; men don't throw themselves out there for approval.

Perhaps, perhaps not, but women don't want a thirtysomething with no job and no future as the potential father of her children.  They want someone who will be able to provide for them and they're offspring as well as aid in the raising of said.   They want winners, I am not now, nor have I ever been anything like a winner at anything.

[iamzack]

If we're just talking about sex, then you can be the biggest loser on the planet and it won't really matter.

If we're talking about longterm stuff, if you're interested in it, then change whatever it is about yourself that generally repels people. I don't mean stuff like interest in computers, I mean stuff like thinking of women as somehow separate from people or being inappropriately overfriendly and creepy.

If you're not interested in it, then there's no problem. Why whine about not having what you don't want, etc.

[mxlm]

Perhaps, perhaps not

No. There is no 'perhaps' here.

[Flipside]

Desperation is the least attractive feature in a man, and women can sense it a mile away.

[IceFire]

Liberator, iamzack has some solid advice right there (to be honest I'm a bit surprised but kudos!). You can help yourself, you can change your lot in life, it isn't easy but you have to want it.  Talking about it and complaining about it won't get you anywhere although it is a first step in recognizing some of the components of your life that you don't like.  That needs to become positive...

Step by step man... work on the job and your life right now.  Then you can think about bringing in someone else.  Seriously... your life perspective can change and change significantly.  Its a wonder what small things can do to you for the positive.  Especially if you've been stuck somewhere.

I was stuck somewhere for 4 years... felt like I was running on a treadmill.  Things slowly changed... some of them I changed and some of them had to fall in to place on their own.  They didn't begin to fall into place until I got the process started... I'm still working on getting to where I want to be.  Maybe I always will be... but I'm starting to learn some wisdom in enjoying the process now that its rolling again and suddenly the 4 years of me being stuck don't seem so wasted because they helped me get to where I'm starting to go.

Its all about outlook... you have to take ownership of it.

[Thaeris]

"Victory is an attitude; this, do not forget." 

[Liberator]

"Victory is an attitude; this, do not forget." 

Probably said by someone after they won.

I don't think I've made this clear.  In my 3.1 decades of life on this pathetic, self-important mudball, I haven't ever won at anything I've tried.  That gets to you and eventually you don't try anymore and then you don't want to try any more because you realize there's no point to it, and likely never was.  Like House says, People don't change.

[iamzack]

Of course there's no real point. You're not gonna get some super special secret message about what you're supposed to do with your life. You're just supposed to find some way to occupy your time until you die. Keep yourself entertained. Hang out and chill. Et cetera.