Have you ever even played games like, say, Grand Prix 2, RFactor or IL-2 series?
The vehicles are part of "level design" and "game balance" in simulators. And the challenge and thrill of playing IL-2 comes from shooting other pilots down and avoiding the same fate. Some enjoy ground attacks, but I prefer to fly against human opponents. It is a test of skill in controlling your airplane, making it do what you want it to do. Tricking your opponent into doing mistakes, while avoiding them yourself.
With a complex simulation underlying in the game world, there are millions of options you can do. If you have a working knowledge of flying in reality, it's easier to put in use in a simulation than a more arcade-y game. If you don't have a working knowledge of aviation, you can even get one from the game. And by that I mean basic understanding of how flight dynamics works.
The controls might be complex but, in reality, not any more than FreeSpace with its gazillion wingman and targeting commands. Basic fighter flying doesn't involve the more sophisticated features like level bombing target sight data inputs. But they're there in case you want to try your hand at them.
And I have to say there IS something rather nice about dropping 1000 kg bombs from 3000 metres dead on through the enemy carrier flight deck... I don't do it often because the climb to altitude and the flight to target and back takes simply too long - I prefer fighter action. But sometimes it's a nice change of pace, especially if you have wingmen on TeamSpeak flying bomber formation or escort fighters.
To me, realism has everything to do with immersion - assuming the game is supposed to be about real events, places or vehicles. Inaccuracies in physics like stupidly simplified flight model makes the game unplayable for me, with no real challenge on that department, and thus most likely boring. Part of the excitement in flying airplanes in IL-2 is how hard it can be and how much concentration it takes to just land some of the airplanes, nevermind lining up for a shot, hitting people while diving at 600 km/h, avoiding crashing into them, avoid overshooting them, avoid stalling, avoid ripping your wings off from excess speed or g-forces, avoid blackout, and most importantly, avoid letting people get into advantageous position for them.
It might seem like a lot of things to avoid, but it all blends into one continuity that makes the game (or simulation) fun, challenging and difficult to master.
I love it. I don't expect you to share my sentiment, but please don't drop statements like "realism is the cancer that is killing games" since it's simply false. Or do you consider abstract games like PacMan or Tetris the pinnacle of gaming?