Alright, we start with the team roster. There's a bunch of gobbos, and some hopefully better players. Oh, and the team name is Flyin' Goblinz'
This is how you guys look like. The photo is taken just when the team was created and nobody has died (yet). Just like from the earlier classroom photos!
We are playing against Bretonnians. Noble knights and dirty peasants and all that. The team is Fearless
We are playing a team with a lower value, so we get to choose our inducements. In this case, it's two bribes. To keep the Secret Weapons running
The stadium is called GobboAir Platz
Here's a team presentation picture that seemed interesting. A chainsaw running on whale oil produces hefty smoke, it even looks like Slayazh has a beard, but that's smoke!
Enigob Skullbasha swings that ball, and knocks down dirty peasants. No injuries or KOs, unfortunately
The first blood is drawn with this blitz from a totally normal Puny Goblin #1
But he manages to surprise the mighty knight by doing a roll. The knight wastes critical 200 milliseconds gaping the goblin with his maw open.
And that's a clear mission kill. The knight breaks his back on the way down. That guy wont be playing Blood Bowl ever again!
We humiliate Brets even further on Turn #2 by surfing their Sancho Pancha
To finalize the deal, our Bombardier throws a bomb to a peasant.
But he fumbles the pass, and the bomb explodes next to his feet, knocking him out for good. And he's now out for the entire match! Slayazh counts his lucky marbles that he is still alive and well, as he was pretty close to the epicenter of the explosion.
Meanwhile, our Pogoer did a bit of run away play, and gets blitzed
Luckily, this blitzer stumbles on the last possible meter and comes falling down
It's re-rolled, but the resulting block dice say Pogoer stays where he is. Whew!
Slayazh offers help with his Chainsaw
But he fails(!) to break armor! How the hell do you manage that with a Chainsaw???
Enigob is flaying his morning star, but the reason you haven't seen a lot of mentions about it is because even if he has been successful in hitting, he hasn't particularly managed to deal damage with it. Here's a momentary shot where he stuns a peon.
The Pogoer is a lone wolf, and once again goes alone. He utilizes all the potential stored energy of the spring, and leaps over the knight.
This I think, is our Spooninator troll, doing what he does best, bashing skulls.
Spoon, could you hit them vewy woughly next time? So that they stay out?! Capiche?
Slayazh is pissed off with the knight's weapon carrier, and attempts to saw him. He fails.
However, our upfield protector goblin (haha!) has had enough, and boots the player laying on the field. Preferably there where it hurts
Unfortunately, the referee is a spoil sport clean game Lemmy, and gives a red card for that behavior. Not on his pitch he says. Remind me to make sure that he needs the services Referee Protection Program after the match.
Pogoer has had enough of the incompetence (there were several near misses on this turn) and runs over the finish line
Oh hells no he didn't do that!
Also, meet our charming cheerleaders
Oh, I sort of forgot that the Referee spots the Secret Weapons after they have been on a pitch for one drive. That means I'll have to draw out the games in future until Turn 8 so that the Secret Weapons have a chance to stay on the pitch for the second period.
Let's see if our clean game Lemmy can resist the lucrative call of personal profit.
He can't for Slayazh, so he will be on the pitch for the next two turns more.
And he can't for Enigob either.
It's about God damn time Lemmy!
Then disaster strikes. The ball lands immediately next to the middle line, and the bloody Bretonnians catch the ball straight from the air. We don't have any players there, as I intentionally withdrew them closer to the center. That may have been a mistake
The team responds immediately by swarming the area. Slayazh manages to KO one. You have to roll one better Slayazh, to keep the opposition players off the pitch for the ENTIRE game!
Our second troll Gutstench then performs the first GobboAir flight. It's a bit annoying that the range of the flight is just one short of reaching the intended destination, the ball carrier. Well, go there anyways.
Yes, yes, he's flying!
Wait, wut???? So lemme get this straight - Gutstench managed to throw the goblin, but he threw him inaccurately. The gobbo landed directly on top of Slayazh, and knocked him out for good.
Further madness results in the knight getting blocked several times in a sequence, but not getting knocked down. The only option was then to surround him
Here's a snapshot of Spoon being Really Stupid
. C'mon troll, it's not that hard! You only had to hit him vewy woughly!
Gutstench shows how it's done
We then get a knock down on a yeoman
It's gotta be that roll that confuses them!
Finally, we boot one knight conveniently lying down. That doesn't do anything.
Then it's time for the half time