Author Topic: The Sequel, Take 2  (Read 37667 times)

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Offline Dark_4ce

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Quote
Originally posted by Tiara

Ow... Those originals... ;7

Just don't let them leak accidentally cause I'll... well, you get the point :drevil:


*bows with respect and keeps a carefull eye on the shimmering axe.*

Oh yes I do....
I have returned... Again...

 

Offline Unknown Target

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Holy ****, I have a LOT of typos, missing info, etc, in this one. Definate proof-reading needed, before I make the whole thing into one document.

Also, Trashman, could you, like, make a seperate "HLP Movie Fan Fiction" thread or something? :D Cause your posts are confusing me :D lol


Anyway!

INT. Admin Quarters. Day.

The elevator door opens suddenly, and out rushes TOMCAT. In his hand, he's carying a half-crumpled piece of paper. Stopping in front of CLOAKED FIGURE's quarters, he turns. We cut to an over-the-shoulder view of TOMCAT, and we focus on the door. After a short pause, it whooshes open. CLOAKED FIGURE is inside the room. All is dark, and only his glowing red eyes are visible.

CF: (Peeved at being disturbed) What?

Tomcat: (stammering) Umm, co-communication, s-sir.

CF's arm suddenly reaches out of the doorway, grabbing the piece of paper. He takes a step outwards into the light to read it, and TOMCAT stumbles backwards a few paces. A slight chuckle is heard from CLOAKED FIGURE, but it soon dies down as he reads the paper.

CF: You are...sure of this?

Tomcat: (Regains his composure) Yes, sir! We intercepted it this morning.

CF: Soo....Shrike is...recruiting, is he? Well....it looks like my hand....has been forced.

Tomcat: Sir?

CF: Gather the troops.

Tomcat: But...sir! We don't have enough!

CLOAKED FIGURE's eye sgrow even brighter now. He takes a step towards TOMCAT, who stumbles backwards up against the wall.

CF: It will be...suffieceint....trust me.

TOMCAT stands up straight and salutes.

Tomcat: Yes, sir!

As he runs down the corridor, we cut to:

INT. Hard Light Armory. Late Day.

We open, sitting against a wall of gun racks. JOHNMIKE is sitting on a bench, reading a (respectable) magazine silently to himself. Suddenly, the door behind us bursts open. JOHNMIKE stands up suddenly. A group of soldiers, wearing a black and red version of the FORUM DEFENSE FORCE uniforms enter the room and advance towards JOHNMIKE.

Johnmike: Hey! You can't be in here!

The soldiers continue advancing. JOHNMIKE reaches for the pistol at his side, but the lead soldier fires a burst of gunfire into his chest, sending him crashing to the floor. The enemy boarders continue onwards. We cut to a view about 3 feet above the soldier's heads, looking flat-on at the weapons lockers. One of the soldiers begins to hand out the weapons from the weapons rack. We cut to:


INT. General Discussions. Night.

A worms-eye view of the large main doors to the room. A few random boarders pass over us. Suddenly, a pounding is heard on the door outside. We cut to a view of several boarders stop their conversations and look over at the source of the noise. The banging gets louder and louder. We cut back to the worm's-eye view again, until the doors suddenly burst open, and out pour thousands of the black-suited troops, firing randomly in the air. Screams are heard, as they duck for cover underneath the sofas. We cut to Stryke, covered with bruises and several casts, dive down under a table.

Stryke: Mother****ers! Not again!

He covers his head with his hands, and we cut to a larger view of the forum. Members are scattering in all directions. We cut to a back view of an overturned sofa. There, DEEP_EYES and FLASER are huddled behind it. Bullets are ripping the fabric to shreds. DEEP_EYES turns to FLASER, and the latter does turns to DEEP_EYES.

deep_eyes: Think we can take 'em?

Flaser: Dunno. How many are there?

We lock the camera to DEEP_EYES' head, as he raises it slowly upwards. We cut to a close-up of the couch, and see his eyes just peaking over. Suddenly, another hailstorm of bullets comes in. DE ducks back down.

DE: Oh....I dunno. Maybe 200 on my side, 300 on yours. But there were a couple hiding, so I dunno.

Flaser: Sounds pretty fair to me.

DEEP_EYES nods, and the two burst draw out a pistol each. Bursting from behind the couch, they scatter into opposite directions. We cut to slow-mo as FLASER leaps to the side, bullets flying past him, ripping everything around him to shreds. As he nears the ground, we cut back to normal motion. Following him, the camera running fast to keep up, bullets pining all around him, he leaps for a ventilation shaft. He slides into it, just as a hail of bullets rip up where he would've been.
We cut back to DEEP_EYES, now hiding behind a large pillar. Bullets are flying past him, bouncing off the pillar randomly. He unloads his clip. We cut to his waste as he reaches down for a spare. There's nothing there.


DE: ****.

He looks slowly across the pillar. The enemy fire is dying down now. Soldiers are checking the dead and wounded. DEEP_EYES takes a deep breath, and runs towards the door, but a soldier spots him.

Soldier: Hey! Stop him!

He raises his gun up. We cut to a view of DEEP_EYES back, as he's running in slow-motion towards the door. We cut to a slow-mo as the soldier raises his gun up slowly. Cut back to DEEP_EYES. Cut back to the soldier. Cut to the trigger. He pulls it, firing a single shot. Cut back to DEEP_EYES. The shot hits him in the square of his back. His arms fly up, sending the pistol into the air. Collapsing to the ground, we cut to a close up of his face as he hits. The pistol lands beside him, and we fade (quickly) to:

 

Offline Tiara

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Nice one as usual :D
I AM GOD! AND I SHALL SMITE THEE!



...because I can :drevil:

 

Offline neo_hermes

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Hell has no fury like an0n...
killing threads is...well, what i do best.

 

Offline Dark_4ce

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:yes: Good stuff! :yes: You're really getting into detail with all the camera shots. I like it! Next best thing to seeing it on the big screen! Now you just have to add some music to it. Heh heh! :D
I dunno, like saying "Cue the orchestral music." Or more specific "Cue the Zimmer music."  :D Keep it up.
I have returned... Again...

 

Offline Windrunner

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Thanks TrashMan. you've made my day. that was the longest i have been in this story ;). Nice reading
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I said a lot of things.  Some of them were even true. - Aldo_14

 

Offline phreak

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heh an0n said "Sir"
Offically approved by Ebola Virus Man :wtf:
phreakscp - gtalk

 

Offline Unknown Target

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Stay tuned...

In the next installment, I shall reveal the identity of Cloaked Figure.

Let the debates ensume. Anyone who gets it right will be put into the story (small or large part, I dunno). If ur dead, I'll either try to reincarnate or at least mention you ;)

 

Offline Shrike

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It's kier.
WE ARE HARD LIGHT PRODUCTIONS. YOU WILL LOWER YOUR FIREWALLS AND SURRENDER YOUR KEYBOARDS. WE WILL ADD YOUR INTELLECTUAL AND VERNACULAR DISTINCTIVENESS TO OUR OWN. YOUR FORUMS WILL ADAPT TO SERVICE US. RESISTANCE IS FUTILE.

 

Offline Unknown Target

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Who? :D

I'd be surprised if no one gets this. I thought it was pretty obvious :)

 

Offline Shrike

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Kier.  He helped set up the board back when we weren't on dynamic4
WE ARE HARD LIGHT PRODUCTIONS. YOU WILL LOWER YOUR FIREWALLS AND SURRENDER YOUR KEYBOARDS. WE WILL ADD YOUR INTELLECTUAL AND VERNACULAR DISTINCTIVENESS TO OUR OWN. YOUR FORUMS WILL ADAPT TO SERVICE US. RESISTANCE IS FUTILE.

 

Offline Hippo

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Black Ace? / CobaltStarr?
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AHTW

 

Offline StratComm

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It's not Carl, is it?  With the red, glowing eyes... *sets down lunch quietly outside the air duct* :nervous:

Actually Setekh was my first guess, but the way you've written him into the story makes that somewhat less likely.  

EDIT:  Make that much less likely.
« Last Edit: November 12, 2003, 09:44:54 pm by 570 »
who needs a signature? ;)
It's not much of an excuse for a website, but my stuff can be found here

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Last edited by StratComm on 08-23-2027 at 08:34 PM

 
Everyone knows it me.  And now, my identity revealed, I will proceed to kick ass until I am "Supreme Executive in charge of Everything".  Thank you.


My real opinion:  Its UT, you had something in your siggy about a cloak or something...Just as long as its not wEvil.
Can the reason that we fear the unknown be that we know ourselves too well?       -The Outer Limits

<*)}}}><  HAPPY FISHIE!!

 

Offline Goober5000

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Gotta be Styxx, implementing teh Plan;)

 

Offline neo_hermes

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some evil hobo with a bottle of jack daniels in his hand
Hell has no fury like an0n...
killing threads is...well, what i do best.

 

Offline Goober5000

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Quote
Originally posted by Goober5000
Gotta be Styxx, implementing teh Plan;)


You know, after re-reading the thread, I realized you already did reveal the cloaked figure's identity. :lol:

http://www.hard-light.net/forums/index.php/topic,13534.0.html

So I don't know whether that was a clever guess or a distant memory resurfacing. :nervous:

EDIT: Bah.  Upon re-reading the complete post, I realized that I skimmed it quickly and probably misinterpreted what was going on.  My new guess is GalacticEmperor.  (Incidentally, if this guess is correct, then GE was actually the first one to predict it, starting back on page 2.)
« Last Edit: November 13, 2003, 12:00:46 am by 561 »

 

Offline Gortef

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great one again UT, great one indeed :nod:
Habeeb it...

  

Offline Singh

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yup
As for who it is.
I predict its Shrike himself, impersonating someone :nervous:

Or maybe its UT himself!
"Blessed be the FREDder that knows his sexps."
"Cursed be the FREDder that trusts FRED2_Open."
Dreamed of much, accomplished little. :(

 

Offline TrashMan

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UT - I wont write anything more... Alltough my own story doesn't interfere with yours...I don't see what's to be confused about...

You could just integrate it and nobody would know....hehehe

EDIT: Yeah...do that..Since Shrike really didn't do anything (and sicne Trashy is locked up). and since nothing affects zour story, just integrate it...

Darn..maby I should have made myself look better...not a guy who gets fooled, bet-up, yelled at and incarsorated...But then again.. I newer was lucky:D
« Last Edit: November 13, 2003, 09:28:05 am by 624 »
Nobody dies as a virgin - the life ****s us all!

You're a wrongularity from which no right can escape!