[Klaustrophobia]

To play the other side here, you don't really know for sure that they weren't depressed at some point.  Maybe not as severely as you, but this isn't really a contest.  I've never sought professional help to be formally diagnosed, but I imagine I'd qualify as mildly depressed.

[BirdofPrey]

The way most people use the word though is as a synonym for being kind of down one day.  Being in a ****ty mood is not the same thing as being depressed.   I do understand other have varying severity if depression, I am talking about the people who seem to think all it is is being in a ****ty mood and tell me I should just cheer up as if it's that magically easy.

Of course these are also the same people who, when my insomnia is really bad, ask me if I've tried just sleeping.

[Sololop]

I've had insomnia a few years ago. 1-2 hours sleep per night, for months at a time. People always used to say stuff like "Try going to bed earlier" lol. I quit school, moved, and got a new job, and that seems to have helped a lot.

[deathfun]

These people are generally less annoying and more easily dealt with than if it's your father who is basically the one going "Sleep earlier, studies say computers make it harder to sleep, melatonin in the sun, etc". This is also why I don't talk to him about issues of the mind. Practical things sure, but as soon as the minds comes into play, his method of fixing the "problem" or my doing things "differently" is usually to skew things to suit the point he's trying to make. I had to go get my appendix removed, and he retorts with "this is your body rebelling against you" and spins it to a dietary/exercise thing

On the bright side, I'm up early now just like everyone wants me to be. Downside is now I have to nap at around 4, 5pm in order to make it through the day

Throat slitting is also a terrible way to go. Good to see you were able to find someone to stop you and that you're proceeding to do something about it

[Colonol Dekker]

Oh my god, the 90s is real in this (with a bit of '82)

Dear god that's the perfect advert. ........Tears of joy.

[Gray]

Oh my god, the 90s is real in this (with a bit of '82)

Dear god that's the perfect advert. ........Tears of joy.

This is disturbing and hilarious at the same time.

[Grizzly]

It reminds me of the Strafe trailer.

[z64555]

Promoting a product while blatantly attacking another product. Yeah...

[Lorric]

I am at the most terrifying point of my life.

Getting married? Congrats!

or... maybe its that time for colonoscopies 

I wanted to cut my throat monday. Needless to say, I did not. I am not comfortable talking about it all on the internetz yet. I got someone to stop me and take me to get help tuesday. and now I gotta hold till next tuesday.

That's the super short lite diet zero calories version.

An4x, I don't know what is troubling you, but I did notice that your cheerful presence on the forum has been in short supply for numerous months now.

I wondered if perhaps you had looked at your own words (I spend too much time here.) and gone off to do other things with your time. But anyway, for what it's worth, I like having you around here, because you're cheerful and cheerfulness is in short supply around here imo. So I'm certainly glad you did not end your life, and I hope you get through whatever it is that troubles you and become your cheerful self again.

Good luck.

[That Man]

Coffee/dinner tonight with:

• a lady I like;
• another lady and a man who recently had a rather acrimonious break-up;
• another lady I like who's also a balls-out amazing poet;
• a teenage girl who hits on everyone up to 10 years older than her;
• another lady who also happens to be a pretty redhead;
• another lady who also happens to be a pretty redhead and thought getting pregnant outside of marriage at 19 was a good idea;
• and yet another pretty lady who is a balls-out amazing poet and is, frankly, curvilicious.

Definitely a mixed bag. It won't be a dull evening, at least.

[InsaneBaron]

My life's latest adventure:

A while back I think I mentioned I was a janitor, emphasis now on was. My old boss, friendly old man, good guy to work for, retired. His replacement was a grumpy guy who kept yelling at us over pretty much everything, whether or not it was our fault. I gave him some time, but thing's didn't improve much, and having your job threatened every couple days was just too much stress to take, so I quit.

The good news is, an old buddy of mine from high school, who swings by every now and then to chat, works as a dishwasher at a high-class restaurant. The staff there is pretty tight-knit, and he was able to set up a job interview for me with the head of the kitchen staff. I show up punctually for the interview. Boss runs in, looking panicked:

"You're Mr. Baron, right? I've got a five-hundred person party upstairs, a three-hundred person fundraiser downstairs, dinner's about to be served and one of my dishwashers didn't show up! Let's see what you can do!" (The guy who didn't show up wasn't the buddy in question)

I'd call seven and a half hours of work a pretty good outcome for a job interview. I start full-time in the summer. Best part is, I won't have to be a dishwasher for very long; the boss is planning to train me as a waiter.

TLDR: Insanebaron the Janitor is gone. All hail Insanebaron the Waiter!

[X3N0-Life-Form]

Glad that this turned out well for you
However:

You're Mr. Baron, right?

If your real name isn't Baron, you should change it to that, 'cause that would be several kinds of awesome

[Mongoose]

That's like the best job interview ever.

[Lorric]

TLDR: Insanebaron the Janitor is gone. All hail Insanebaron the Waiter!

Congrats!

That's like the best job interview ever.

Indeed. What a great opportunity that was. Get to prove you can do the job instead of trying to prove it with words.

If your real name isn't Baron, you should it to that, 'cause that would be several kinds of awesome

Yes, I also thought that sounded good.

[InsaneBaron]

If your real name isn't Baron, you should it to that, 'cause that would be several kinds of awesome

Yes, I also thought that sounded good.

Not a bad idea. Although to do that, I'd need a lawyer, and to hire a lawyer I need money, which means I better do well at this waiter gig.

[deathfun]

I've been meaning to change my name to Deathfun
The joke was that I'd have to change my last name too if I did

[z64555]

I've been meaning to change my name to Deathfun
The joke was that I'd have to change my last name too if I did

Oh, so you'd be Mr. Fun? 

[Klaustrophobia]

You need a lawyer to change your name? 

[InsaneBaron]

You need a lawyer to change your name? 

I think you do in the US, but I could be wrong. Never looked into it.

[deathfun]

How To Apply For A Legal Change Of Name

Changing your name is an important decision that may have consequences or effects on your personal life and business matters. In most instances a legal change of name will change your birth record. Prior to completing a change of name application please ensure that you have read through the following points:

    For basic eligibility requirements for change of name
    For information on requesting waivers of parental consent
    Will my fingerprints have to be provided in order to successfully complete a change of name application?
    What is the required fee to apply for a change of name?
    For information on changing your name after marriage, reverting to a maiden surname or previous married name
    Fill out and print the online "Application for Change of Name". Typing your information directly on the form avoids the potential delays caused by misinterpreted handwriting. Any parts of the form you do not fill out online can be left blank and completed by hand after the form is printed.
    Pick up a copy in person at a Vital Statistics or Service BC office.

Application Requirements

    All applications must include completion of Parts 1 (a) and (b) by the applicant. This may be a person changing his/her own name or a parent applying to change his/her child's name.
    Surrender of all original birth certificates is required for each person born in Canada and changing a name legally. If born outside Canada, certified copies of immigration papers, permanent resident card or citizenship card.
    In addition to a birth certificate, a marriage certificate may be required plus proof of custody if a parent is applying to change a child's name without the other parent's consent.
    Advertising of your intent to legally change your name is no longer required.
    Individuals 18 years of age or older who are changing their names are required to have electronic fingerprints taken by the RCMP, or an RCMP-accredited affiliate. Fingerprinting officials collect a fee for taking fingerprints in addition to the criminal record check fee of $25, and provide a receipt upon payment. Include the original receipt or a certified copy with your application.
    All appropriate fees enclosed.

http://www.vs.gov.bc.ca/name/howto.html

Looked at one for the United States and the wasn't any mention of requiring a lawyer

Oh, so you'd be Mr. Fun? 

Well I could do that, that would work. First name Death, last name Fun!
Alternatively, I wonder if you could make it so you don't have a last name...