Author Topic: Relatively trivial bug claims lulz, Battuta's hair  (Read 12911 times)

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Offline General Battuta

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Relatively trivial bug claims lulz, Battuta's hair
I woke up on one beautiful morning recently and found out that ALL MY MISSIONS HAD BEEN DESTROYED

Well, I exaggerate slightly. By ALL I mean AT LEAST ONE. But it was THE MOST IMPORTANT ONE.

We're about to release. I mean, it could happen soon, really ****ing soon. So at this stage our missions are supposed to be pretty much cool, y'know? Pretty much golden. Not suddenly and bizarrely impossible.

Allow me to clarify.

The opening stages of this mission - which is, I think inarguably, our best - involve some bombers attacking a friendly ship. These bombers are pretty clever. They come in from multiple angles, with fighter escort, using Maxims to get in some damage before they close to bomb range. But if you're quick and smart you have the tools to handle them and save your ship.

Or at least that's what I thought.

I woke up this fine morning and played my beautiful mission and suddenly WHAT THE DEAR JESUS THE SKY IS FULL OF WARHEADS

I screamed. I screamed. Six Artemis bombers should not be able to fire forty-eight Cyclops warheads in the span of a few seconds. FORTY-EIGHT.

Look, you don't understand how awful this was. These bombers were supposed to cruise in putting out warheads at a realistic rate: a dual launch every few seconds, just like a human player switching banks and re-locking.

Instead they had become cigar-chomping, tough-talking bomb-launching MACHINES. They fired bombs and didn't afraid of anything! Their secondary banks were full of little men tossing those warheads out into space. These bombers were giving birth faster than an all-Catholic fertility clinic!

As I was screaming my good friend Nighteyes popped onto IRC and said: 'yo my domestic skillets, who put swarm torpedoes on the Tev bombers?' (or something to that effect)

So I knew it wasn't just me. The madness was everywhere. These bombers were on a rampage.

You have never seen hell like these bombers produced. Nighteyes has done new bomb trail and detonation art. Additionally, Wanderer implemented a gorgeous new scripting effect that creates a full-screen flash when a Cyclops (or other warhead) goes off - a flash that fades into a pretty orange fireball like a dying sun. Finally these bombs feel like thermonuclear weapons.

And now there were dozens, perhaps hundreds of them cruising in towards this ship. Point defense guns picked them off by the basketful, and hideous nuclear fire swelled across my vision - but through the clouds of flame flocked dozens more, their drive trails braiding together like the queue of an ancient warrior! Unstoppable! Unyielding! MERCILESS!

At first I thought it might be the fact that we'd just switched to a new build. Sushi's AI changes had caused bomb-fire issues in the past. But The_E, our stalwart friend in code, said that nothing in the AI sections had been changed.

Bemused, I began reverting my own FRED commits, certain that I had somehow, somewhen done something mad to this mission. I'd just gotten through a round of rebalancing - perhaps that was the problem?

But no. Reverting to a build of the mission that had previously been self-playing, I now saw cackling GTVA bombers swooping through space, unloading Cyclops from bellies pregnant with thermonuclear destruction. Hapless UEF gunships firing eight banks of the most volcanic firepower in the Federation arsenal were powerless to stop this blizzard of death. These ships danced the Dance of the Seven Veils, except the veils were made of bombs.

I went to SVN and checked the logs on our highly custom, extremely awesome AI profiles and table (which all mods from this day forward should steal!). Indeed, there had been a recent change; Fury had made some tweaks.

To the Blue Planet 1 AI profile.

Which this mission didn't use.

I wept. Mysterious forces beyond my ken had reached into my beautiful mission and energized its pilots with inhuman bomb-firing abilities. I could only imagine the GTVA warriors giving a mighty KIAAIIIIIII shout as they worked their triggers, their biceps bulging with sinew after years of Ivan Drago-esque steroid therapy and weight training.

Meanwhile The_E calmly suggested that I revert Fury's recent changes, just in case.

So I did. And through my tears I saw, miracle of miracles, that sanity had been restored. Although Fury's AI changes had not even touched the BP2 AI profile, somehow they were responsible. With them reverted, the bombers were once more merely mortal. Balance had been restored.

Eventually the mighty Wanderer deduced that the problem was the use of the #nocreate flag in the tables. We still don't know why, or how (there's a Mantis issue open), but somehow the mere presence of #nocreate drove the AI into a murderous fury.

So, gentlemen: be wary out there. The AI may seem biddable and complacent. It may do what you wish, FREDDers; it may crumble before your weapons, brave pilots. But deep in the convoluted logic of its code, it possesses abilities that many would deem...unnatural.

Do not tempt its rage.
« Last Edit: June 22, 2010, 03:27:05 pm by General Battuta »

 
Re: Relatively trivial bug claims lulz, Battuta's hair
 :lol:  Dear God, the melodrama!  You should write soaps.
"Wouldn't it be so wonderful if everything were meaningless?
But everything is so meaningful, and most everything turns to ****.
Rejoice."
-David Bazan

 

Offline MatthTheGeek

  • Captain Obvious
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Re: Relatively trivial bug claims lulz, Battuta's hair
Modding is fun, isn't it ?
People are stupid, therefore anything popular is at best suspicious.

Mod management tools     -     Wiki stuff!     -     Help us help you

666maslo666: Releasing a finished product is not a good thing! It is a modern fad.

SpardaSon21: it seems like you exist in a permanent state of half-joking misanthropy

Axem: when you put it like that, i sound like an insane person

bigchunk1: it's not retarded it's american!
bigchunk1: ...

batwota: steele's maneuvering for the coup de gras
MatthTheGeek: you mispelled grĂ¢ce
Awaesaar: grace
batwota: oh right :P
Darius: ah!
Darius: yes, i like that
MatthTheGeek: the way you just spelled it it means fat
Awaesaar: +accent I forgot how to keyboard
MatthTheGeek: or grease
Darius: the killing fat!
Axem: jabba does the coup de gras
MatthTheGeek: XD
Axem: bring me solo and a cookie

 
Re: Relatively trivial bug claims lulz, Battuta's hair
At least you didn't cut yourself this time.
17:37:02   Quanto: I want to have sexual intercourse with every space elf in existence
17:37:11   SpardaSon21: even the males?
17:37:22   Quanto: its not gay if its an elf

[21:51] <@Droid803> I now realize
[21:51] <@Droid803> this will be SLIIIIIGHTLY awkward
[21:51] <@Droid803> as this rich psychic girl will now be tsundere for a loli.
[21:51] <@Droid803> OH WELLL.

See what you're missing in #WoD and #Fsquest?

[07:57:32] <Caiaphas> inspired by HerraTohtori i built a supermaneuverable plane in ksp
[07:57:43] <Caiaphas> i just killed my pilots with a high-g maneuver
[07:58:19] <Caiaphas> apparently people can't take 20 gees for 5 continuous seconds
[08:00:11] <Caiaphas> the plane however performed admirably, and only crashed because it no longer had any guidance systems

 
Re: Relatively trivial bug claims lulz, Battuta's hair
I demand the inclusion in the final release of a patch to replicate this behaviour. Because it sounds quite funny. :lol:

Quote
Instead they had become cigar-chomping, tough-talking bomb-launching MACHINES. They fired bombs and didn't afraid of anything! Their secondary banks were full of little men tossing those warheads out into space. These bombers were giving birth faster than an all-Catholic fertility clinic!

 :wakka:

 

Offline headdie

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Re: Relatively trivial bug claims lulz, Battuta's hair
I demand the inclusion in the final release of a patch to replicate this behaviour. Because it sounds quite funny. :lol:

Quote
Instead they had become cigar-chomping, tough-talking bomb-launching MACHINES. They fired bombs and didn't afraid of anything! Their secondary banks were full of little men tossing those warheads out into space. These bombers were giving birth faster than an all-Catholic fertility clinic!

 :wakka:

seraphim spam anyone
Minister of Interstellar Affairs Sol Union - Retired
quote General Battuta - "FRED is canon!"
Contact me at [email protected]
My Release Thread, Old Release Thread, Celestial Objects Thread, My rubbish attempts at art

 
Re: Relatively trivial bug claims lulz, Battuta's hair
I demand the inclusion in the final release of a patch to replicate this behaviour. Because it sounds quite funny. :lol:

Quote
Instead they had become cigar-chomping, tough-talking bomb-launching MACHINES. They fired bombs and didn't afraid of anything! Their secondary banks were full of little men tossing those warheads out into space. These bombers were giving birth faster than an all-Catholic fertility clinic!

 :wakka:

seraphim spam anyone

Oh dear god, the Seraphim spam of old....

 

Offline Shivan Hunter

  • 210
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Re: Relatively trivial bug claims lulz, Battuta's hair
I gotta say.

You write the most entertaining bug reports I've ever read.

:D :yes:

 
Re: Relatively trivial bug claims lulz, Battuta's hair
I gotta say.

You write the most entertaining bug reports I've ever read.

:D :yes:

I agree. Battuta, this made my day.

:wakka:
"You need to believe in things that aren't true. How else can they become?" -DEATH, Discworld

"You can fight like a krogan, run like a leopard, but you'll never be better than Commander Shepard!"

 

Offline Kolgena

  • 211
Re: Relatively trivial bug claims lulz, Battuta's hair
:D:D:D

+1 for including the bugged mission as part of the release.

 

Offline General Battuta

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Re: Relatively trivial bug claims lulz, Battuta's hair
Well we can't very well do that as the bug was in AI profiles and would thus affect all missions everywhere forever.  :(

Plus I think the big's been fixed!  BP: we find bugs, SCP steps on them with alacrity.

 

Offline Madcat

  • 26
Re: Relatively trivial bug claims lulz, Battuta's hair
Awesome report, I've just barely regained my sight after laughing tears.  :lol:

Hm, can we have some screenshots at least?  :)

 

Offline Snail

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Re: Relatively trivial bug claims lulz, Battuta's hair
The report of the bomb flares braiding together sounds cool. This could be a legitimate weapon in BP3. :P

 
Re: Relatively trivial bug claims lulz, Battuta's hair
Well we can't very well do that as the bug was in AI profiles and would thus affect all missions everywhere forever.  :(

Plus I think the big's been fixed!  BP: we find bugs, SCP steps on them with alacrity.
Let me see if I got this right: the bug was fixed in the code, so including the table that caused the problem is no longer going to reproduce it. Is that correct?

In that case... Oh. :(

 

Offline Ypoknons

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Re: Relatively trivial bug claims lulz, Battuta's hair
War in Heaven, New Game +
Long time ago, you see, there was this thing called the VBB and... oh, nevermind.

 

Offline T-Man

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  • I came... I saw... I had a cuppa!
Re: Relatively trivial bug claims lulz, Battuta's hair
Eventually the mighty Wanderer deduced that the problem was the use of the #nocreate flag in the tables. We still don't know why, or how (there's a Mantis issue open), but somehow the mere presence of #nocreate drove the AI into a murderous fury.

They probably got touchy coz you denied them a full entry in the BP profile. The Ursas and Medusas are old timers that are used to it, and the Boers' have gotten used to being unloved, but them Artemis... newest to the block... they ain't used to it yet; they take it personally, and now they revolt against the system! They. Want. Blood.

...can anyone envision a communist-esque "Artemises of the world, unite!" poster right now?
CAUTION: Rabid Imagination!

self-confessed UEF fanboy.

 

Offline Satellight

  • 27
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Re: Relatively trivial bug claims lulz, Battuta's hair
Just amazing and hilarious ! If only all bugs were fun as this one... I wouldn't be these bombers' opponent  :eek2:
Never far away from HLP and from a computer with an installed FreeSpace.

 

Offline Echelon9

  • 210
Re: Relatively trivial bug claims lulz, Battuta's hair
I'm going to fix a Mantis bug or two, and then add another subtle one that will recreate this. I want to see this in action!

 

Offline General Battuta

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Re: Relatively trivial bug claims lulz, Battuta's hair
Not in trunk, I hope.

 

Offline Echelon9

  • 210
Re: Relatively trivial bug claims lulz, Battuta's hair
Hahah, no - don't worry! :)